MATT: Hello, and welcome to tonight’s episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons and Dragons First and foremost, we are super excited that we actually have in the flesh here with us tonight the wonderful Ashley Johnson! (cheering) ASHLEY: So glad MATT: We missed you so much ASHLEY: I missed you. Everybody LIAM: You are not allowed to go LAURA: Yeah, we’re going to put her in a locked room ASHLEY: I’d be okay with it LIAM: You’ll eat your rice and play Dungeons and Dragons MATT: I’m glad you could join us here for this All right, so next up I believe, Laura, we have some new merch? Apparently, which I forgot about until you showed me before the show LAURA: I was just showing this off before the stream. We have this amazing Matthew Mercer shirt (cheering) LAURA: It’s kind of wrinkly because I was sitting on it but MATT: I have a shirt LAURA: So hey, that’s in the store. That’s in the store right now TRAVIS: It’s got the logo on the back too ASHLEY: You have a t-shirt LAURA: And it’s subtle, I like that anybody that doesn’t know what it is would just think it’s a cool silhouette shirt. And then anybody that does know what it is, it’s like they’re “in.” TRAVIS: Is that the kind DM shirt, or is that the evil sarcastic– LAURA: He’s smirking evilly. It’s an evil smirk LIAM: You know the meme, when the dungeon master smiles, it’s too late MATT: Exactly. I really like it. I think it’s inspired reminiscent of another project I work on And it makes me happy LAURA: That’s what inspired us to do it LIAM: By the time he’s smiling, you’re already getting choked out MATT: Good times. Next up, just a reminder, we have the Critical Role Vox Machina Origins comic book available on Comixology, on Dark Horse Apparently, where it is at now? LIAM: It’s the second highest rated comic book on Comixology at the moment LAURA: Because Critters are awesome TALIESIN: Sitting at nine on the current bestseller list LAURA: Of all time? SAM: Of all time LIAM: On Comixology MARISHA: We have the best fans TRAVIS: Yeah, pretty much TALIESIN: It’s a good book! MARISHA: It’s so good MATT: Next one is coming soon LIAM: We saw it MATT: Excited for you guys TALIESIN: It’s got so much MATT: We’ll have information soon on when the next comic comes out next month. Don’t forget we have Talks Machina next Tuesday to discuss this episode. Next Tuesday at 7:00pm Pacific with our fantastic host Brian Foster to discuss Travis’ third testicle TALIESIN: Oh, they found out about that MATT: Yeah. It’s on the list here. Also, don’t forget it’s the last week of September so if you haven’t had a chance yet and you always wanted to go ahead and join the Geek and Sundry Twitch community and subscribe, or any other Twitch community that you’ve been waiting for, they’re half off this month. So now’s the time to jump in Laura and Travis, you’re going to be at a convention in Atlanta this weekend LAURA: Why yes, we leave tomorrow morning actually TRAVIS: Bright and early, Anime Weekend Atlanta We’re there Friday, Saturday, Sunday, come down, see us and throw things in our face. That’d be great LAURA: And we’re also going to be in Australia in a couple weeks, or this November SAM: Ashley, what’s going on with you? Anything to plug? Any other projects that you’re working on? LAURA: Are you working on any kind of shows or anything? MARISHA: Yeah, it seems like you’ve been so busy ASHLEY: I just didn’t want to come. I’ve just got other things to do. Shop online. I’m just busy, guys. Looking at Cute Emergency on Twitter, there’s just so many more important things to do than this. Just kidding, that’s not true MARISHA: You do retweet Cute Emergency quite a lot TALIESIN: You’re how I found Cute Emergency ASHLEY: Oh really? That makes me so glad. We love aminals MATT: All righty. Well then, without further ado Let’s go ahead and dive into tonight’s episode of Critical Role [dramatic music]
LIAM: –me, daddy MATT: Little late on the draw there, bud MARISHA: Like, unfashionably late LIAM: What an accident that was. Oh no! MATT: Welcome back. So last we left off, Vox Machina had made their way through the innards of the undead risen primordial earth titan. On its shoulders was held the long-abandoned until recently city of Thar Amphala, from the Shadowfell. A city that once held the armies of Vecna, the Undying King who has since risen once more, and achieved godhood in recent days You traversed to this titan, through its innards up into the city of Thar Amphala; which you notice the outer wall currently manages to maintain an arcane dome that holds at bay any of the outward assailing forces of the wyvern riders or Devo’ssa, the brass dragon. Where the inside of it contains, in wait, a cloud of various gloomstalkers and a skeletal dragon that just peruse the city in safety as you make your way through the streets in search of the recently reassembled and standing tower of Entropis Now upon seeking a sword that you were notified had historical binds to the hatred of Vecna and hopefully his downfall, the Sword of Kas, you went seeking this weapon, long ago discarded and bound within a buried catacomb within a pit of acid along with various corpses left over from an ancient war. And in doing so, unfortunately notified Vecna of your arrival. As Vex passed through into the ethereal plane, the ring that kept any sort of scrying at bay was lost. And both Vax and Keyleth came to his attention. All of you managed to flee back to Scanlan’s mansion where the rest were in wait However, with a notification fresh at hand, the skeletal dragon swooped into the chamber where the mansion was set, on its back riding Lady Delilah Briarwood and the re-risen Sylas Briarwood The mansion was dispelled, you were exited from the pocket plane and barely maneuvering, due to a very lucky roll, having your Plane Shift dispelled you made your way into the Feywild as a Hail Mary. And through a dick-drawing, made contact with the one archfey that you had encountered in your previous journeys, Artagan Upon being summoned, and your knowledge of the strange time-altering nature of exiting the Feywild, you asked if it was within his power to ensure the condensing of the time passage when you were to return. He agreed, under two conditions One, when this was all said and done, you would help him assemble a doorway in the Prime Material Plane, in which he could visit your space. And two, upon realizing that Vax was of some undying or re-rising nature, wished to strangle him until dead. You agreed, and shortly thereafter Vax expired into ashes and you all spent time awaiting his return We’ve left off with the return of Vax, but if there’s anything you wanted to do over that period of time before his arrival, now would be the time to do it SAM: Before his arrival? TRAVIS: When he walks back
LAURA: So that we can do some spells that will be in effect for a day. Potentially SAM: But he takes a while to come back MATT: It takes a little while, yeah LAURA: So we should do some of our spells right before we go to sleep SAM: Yeah, for sure. Is that now? LAURA: I don’t know! SAM: Is sleep now? MATT: That’s up to you LAURA: We do need to do Heroes’ Feast. I have one chalice left ASHLEY: But then Vax won’t be in the– LAURA: Unless we leave him a plate MATT: Well, the meal appears for a short time LAURA: Then we need to do that right when he gets back MARISHA: Right before we sleep? LAURA: Yeah, hopefully he’ll be back before– SAM: We’ll wait a few hours LAURA: We’ll wait a few hours to see if he shows up and then we’ll cast it to see because we need time to be able to do it MATT: We’ll say for the truncating of the wait period that eight hours go by, 12 hours go by, it’s hard to tell time in the Feywild, since it doesn’t have a day-night cycle, it’s always on the cusp of sunset. And the longer you wait, and the more the boredom sets in, the more the stress of the coming fray creeps into the back of your mind, you find that it seems like far too much time has passed and you begin to worry, you begin to twitch, you begin to do search parties around the surrounding forest, the possibility that he returned and got lost. You don’t know how much time has passed until you convene to desperately ask if there was any possible sight, and at that point you hear the snapping of foliage beneath a distant foot, and you all turn and by the nearby tree you see entering the pale, nude, long dark-haired body of Vax returned in his revenant form for a second time TRAVIS: Yep, that’s him LIAM: That was a thing. Does anyone have my clothing? LAURA: Yes TRAVIS: No, they took it and ran, it was part of the penance. We fought bravely. It’s buck naked from here on out LIAM: That’s going to make tomorrow a little squirrely MARISHA: Scanlan awkwardly put it in a weird druid circle rock thing, it’s over there SAM: We were protecting it for you MARISHA: He doesn’t know how to do druid circles really right SAM: The goddess Ioun told me to protect it in a circle reminiscent of the circle of my third eye MARISHA: (whispering) I don’t think he’s telling the truth LIAM: Do you have all my shoes and glasses so I may have them? SAM: As Ioun wills it, yes LIAM: Okay, could you lead me and my penis towards them now? SAM: Ioun be pleased, I will LIAM: We’re still standing here. It’s getting awkward SAM: I’m a holy man. It’s supposed to be awkward LAURA: I’m going to start the Heroes’ Feast, I’m just going to get the chalice TALIESIN: I’ll help with that, that sounds like a great use of time and not watching this TRAVIS: I have a question. Should we ask the Sword of Kas, since it’s fought Vecna before, does it know of any weaknesses? LAURA: That’s actually really smart. Wow, that’s really smart, Grog! ASHLEY: Oh good idea TALIESIN: Don’t think too hard about it SAM: We can’t hear him so you’ll have to talk Hello? TRAVIS: Sorry LAURA: That took a lot out of you TRAVIS: I need to sit TALIESIN: Grog, I have an idea. Why don’t you ask the sword if it has any idea of Vecna’s weaknesses? TRAVIS: (gasp) That’s a good idea Percy! TALIESIN: I’m so glad I had it TRAVIS: Oh my god, yes. Wait, wait, if I pull it out of the sheath to talk to it– can I talk to it through the sheath? MATT: You probably have to draw it TRAVIS: I might have to draw it and then it’s going to need the (glugging) LAURA: Here TRAVIS: You?! LAURA: You can cut me TRAVIS: Look, listen, I made a promise to your brother, he was very adamant that I’m supposed to stick it– TALIESIN: I’ll take it. It’s my turn SAM: Percy, what a tough thing for you to do TRAVIS: Do you want just a hand slice or do you want to up the ante and I stick it in your thigh? I do have to bathe it, it has to be quite a coating LAURA: Just do it, we’ll heal him up TRAVIS: Okay, cool, come on Percy. Buy the ticket, baby! So can I unsheathe Kas? MATT: As you pull the blade out, there’s a very silent glass against textured metal sound. The blade is so dark that barely any of the light seems to come across it. Where the blade is, up close, you can barely make out the outside of it, but as soon as you draw it the voice goes, “Hungry.” TALIESIN: All right, just on the count of three TRAVIS: Do I get to pick where? Okay. I reach around to the back of his knee and I pull along there LAURA: Back of his knee?! Are you trying to take him out of commission for future fights? That’s
really terrible TALIESIN: I said yes LAURA: I want to cast Cure Wounds at third level on Percy TRAVIS: Yeah, when you shave your legs the back of your knee is the tricky part, right? TALIESIN: It’s just so I can swim faster, that was not for you to advertise MATT: As you deal with the nearly hamstrung self that is your right knee, the sword is coated well enough in Percival blood as it seeps into the darkened blade, and the voice goes “Ah, yes.” TRAVIS: Respectfully, Kas, I had a few questions because I am on board to satisfy your maniacal desires to fuck up Vecna and all that he stands for, right? Oh no, Kas? MATT: “Yes?” TRAVIS: Oh, thank god. Might need more blood soon Do you know of any weaknesses that Vecna has, or opportunities that we could explite? MATT: “He is more intelligent than most, but his arrogance gets the best of him. He likes a show.” TRAVIS: Apparently he’s really smart, and is arro– aromatic LAURA: He smells? MARISHA: Enigmatic? LIAM: Acrobatic MARISHA: What does he mean? TRAVIS: He likes to put on a show, I think LAURA: He likes to put on a show TRAVIS: Yeah MATT: “He builds webs of plots, so many things intertwined.” TRAVIS: Doesn’t make much sense, apparently he builds whips out of plots MATT: “Cut the threads, and the web can falter.” TRAVIS: Oh right, he strings things together like a web, you know, like a dog makes LAURA: Oh that’s smart, okay MATT: “I can cut these threads, bring me to these threads, bring me to him, I must cut him down, “now, now.” TRAVIS: Yeah, oh god, he’s really adamant about cutting the webs SAM: He’s a sword, he cuts, that’s his thing MARISHA: Wait, cutting webs? TRAVIS: Yeah. I guess Vecna has spider abilities Pro-tip LAURA: Okay. That’s interesting, we didn’t notice that before TRAVIS: Any physical weaknesses, or things that he is vulnerable to that we should know? MATT: “Me.” TRAVIS: Him, okay, cool, I think we’ve got everything MARISHA: He’s vulnerable to– oh, to– TRAVIS: To him MARISHA: Got it, I got what they got TRAVIS: All right, next time I pull you out in the light it will probably be to kill Vecna or someone that I don’t like MATT: As you put it away you hear a (sigh) TALIESIN: You’re actually going to pull that sword out and it will have committed suicide TRAVIS: How’s your knee, is it okay? TALIESIN: It’s feeling much better, thank you LIAM: Should we maybe talk out our plan for the moment? SAM: Sure. That sounds fun LIAM: No it doesn’t, but I do think we should probably have at it. We’ve got the trammels, Grog’s got them LAURA: So Sylas is back MARISHA: Along with Delilah. That’s fun LAURA: So my blessing, from Pelor MARISHA: Hashtag blessed LAURA: Hashtag blessed. Gives radiant damage to anything evil that attacks me with a spell. That’s pretty neat, huh? I have a feeling radiant damage is going to be really important in this fight MARISHA: I recently was able to attune to this armor that I haven’t been able to attune to for a long time and now I’m resistant to spells. So that’s good LAURA: What? MARISHA: Yes LAURA: You’ve just been wearing it and it’s not done anything? MARISHA: Kind of. Well I had to attune to my ring and my antlers, and then I got the staff, so I let that go, but now I just wore it for long enough LIAM: What are your three attuned right now? MARISHA: I have four, because I took a feat when I leveled up. Yeah that’s pretty dope TRAVIS: I got a whole bunch of more hit points SAM: What’s a hit point? TRAVIS: It’s like, I don’t know. But I was thinking, I have all three trammels, right, and I need to get real close to do anything to Vecna. Is it stupid for me to have all of them? LIAM: Yes it is, we need to spread those out. We need to decide who is doing what, at least what we think is going to happen. I think I should take one of the trammels LAURA: You’re speedy, of course MARISHA: And I think it’s smart if Pike and I dedicate a decent amount of our spell power to Freedom of Movement right before we go in
TALIESIN: That won’t be necessary for me but for the rest of you TRAVIS: So we don’t get paralyzed SAM: If Vax has a trammel, and Grog has a trammel, who has the third trammel? LIAM: One of these two LAURA: I could do it SAM: Someone who can fly. You can fly LAURA: I have a broom after all. But Pike can fly now too SAM: Don’t you have to be super strong to use these trammels? MARISHA: Pike is super strong, she’s a monstah! SAM: No, I’m fine with that. Can she fly? LAURA: She can fly ASHLEY: I can now SAM: How? ASHLEY: Well it’s for ten minutes SAM: That’s all we’ll need LAURA: Ten minutes is a long time if it’s right at the beginning of the fight SAM: But that’s when we’ll need to use the trammels MATT: Giant wings LAURA: It’s pretty tight. Oh my god you can fucking fly! TRAVIS: I reach over to Pike, I spin her around, are there any wings on the back? MATT: No ASHLEY: I don’t know where they are! TRAVIS: I don’t know how to break this to you They’re not there yet SAM: Sometimes they’re on the ankles TRAVIS: I turn her upside down, look at her feet MATT: No wings TRAVIS: I turn her back. Just keep wishing, they’ll grow in. Okay ASHLEY: Oh, thank you, Grog LAURA: So do you think you’re stronger, and you’re more proficient with actual melee weapons, right? Because I don’t think I can shoot a trammel from my bow ASHLEY: I feel like I’d be pretty proficient because it takes the strength to do it? I’ve got it LAURA: Okay, let’s have Pike hold the other one So Pike, you’re the third. And we have to protect our cleric SAM: What are all of us doing? I’m praying into a book LAURA: Fighting SAM: Sure MATT: To give you a mechanical idea, based on what Ioun had notified you, the more damaged Vecna’s avatar form is, the lower the DC to drive a trammel into the body LAURA: Oh, so we got to bloody him up and then– MATT: Possibly. Or roll really high early on, the choice is up to you, that is the risk you have to take LAURA: We don’t know, if we try it with the trammel and it doesn’t work, it doesn’t break the trammel, we just have to try again? MATT: You have two strong and one fragile trammel in your midst LAURA: Oh wait, who’s holding the fragile one? LIAM: I am LAURA: You’re holding the fragile one MARISHA: Okay, so save that one for when he’s real fucked up. Percy and I had a thought for Grog TRAVIS: Thank god, because I don’t have any more MARISHA: If you borrow Percy’s Spider-Climbing boots I can maybe make some pillars to add for cover for some of us more rangey people, but then if I add pillars of different heights you can climb up them TRAVIS: Do I have to attune to them? TALIESIN: No TRAVIS: Does my speed translate to going up things as well? MATT: Oh yeah TALIESIN: I don’t know what boots you have right now TRAVIS: I have the Feral Leaping boots TALIESIN: Would you rather just run like Spider-Man? Up to you TRAVIS: If he’s more than 20 feet in the air, I’m fucked SAM: How can we get Grog to fly, though? Because these pillars can’t go all the way to the heavens, can they? MARISHA: I mean I could Shapechange into something and give him a mount, he can ride me LIAM: What about you Scanlan? LAURA: Can you still cast if you’re a dragon or something? MARISHA: I can cast in Beast Shape, Shapechange is a spell, so if I’m a dragon, beholder, that’s what you get MATT: If the creature you transform into has spells you can use those spells, but that’s the only circumstance LAURA: There’s coffee all over it TALIESIN: Yes there is, there’s coffee on everything there MARISHA: Your dice tray dried nicely, though TALIESIN: I think it actually has a little bit of nice character. Look at that MATT: A testament to Wyrmwood’s craftsmanship Critrole! LAURA: This got put in the dishwasher, and the leather got cooler after it got put in the dishwasher MATT: Anyway you guys SAM: No no, we’re focused. I guess we could use these pillars, but it seems like a waste of your spell to get him halfway up towards Vecna, if Vecna is flying LAURA: The thing is if you’re flying you can get knocked off, I’ve been there, and then it’s super bad, so actually the pillars are really wonderful in that regard SAM: If he’s straight above us MARISHA: Well I can do six of them, I can do a lot of pillars LAURA: He could be off of the tower, yes, and then it’s all ranged attacks, that’s what we have SAM: All right, no plan TALIESIN: The plans are easy, the magic users are going to be attacking Vecna with all they’re worth LAURA: Hopefully we’ll be able to take out the Briarwoods before the fight MARISHA: I can cause up to six pillars, each pillar is a cylinder five feet wide and up to 30 feet high, and can do six of them SAM: Can you do them on top of each other? MARISHA: Well, he wasn’t that much more than 30 feet last time LAURA: He was above us, but if he goes off of the tower LIAM: I was about 50 or 60 feet in the air and I was above him MARISHA: If I get Grog 30 feet up you still have your throwing axe, he’s still reachable another 30
feet for you right? Theoretically TRAVIS: Yeah, but I’m not using the axe or the hammer, I’m using the sword MATT: You can still attach the Chain of Returning to the Sword of Kas TRAVIS: Yeah, but it’s only one attack per action MATT: Correct TRAVIS: Instead of three MARISHA: But it’s something, if he’s out of range TALIESIN: I’ll have enough bullets that I may not be able to hurt him, but I can make him drop TRAVIS: What are you planning on doing? SAM: My plan is to not run away, because we’re going to die fighting or we’re going to save the world, right? So I definitely won’t be running away. Definitely LAURA: Scanlan SAM: I may run away LIAM: If you do, and he slaughters everybody, and subjugates the entire world– SAM: I’ll tell your story, and I’ll tell it very well LIAM: As the Crumbly, the little guy to Jabba the Hutt, for Vecna LAURA: Scanlan. If you promise you won’t run away, I’ll put this fucking hat back on SAM: (gasps) LAURA: And I bring out the stupid pointy hat that he gave me SAM: Wow! That’s a deal TRAVIS: Here’s the thing, last time we fought Vecna, he went higher than 30 feet, he was up where Vax was before he fell LIAM: I was above him though, and I was 50 or 60 up, he wasn’t that high TRAVIS: Oh TALIESIN: Up to you, that is an option that is up to you. But let me know, because either way I’m going to either keep my boots or not keep my boots MARISHA: Do we remember how high the tower orby situation was, did we get a number for it? MATT: The tower of Entropis? The very height of it you didn’t gauge entirely as you flew up, but even at a bit of distance, it was hundreds of feet high MARISHA: No, I mean, there was the dome above that MATT: Oh, the dome above that is probably about another 100 or 200 feet above that. It’s a big dome and it encompasses the entire city of Entropis TALIESIN: And we don’t know who’s casting that, we don’t know where that’s coming from MATT: Make an intelligence check TALIESIN: Okay MARISHA: I mean there’s that gemstone thing that he’s using LAURA: Natural 20! TALIESIN: No, but a 21 will do it MATT: You recall, the Thar Amphala that is currently embedded in the titan is not the entire city, it’s only the inner circle of the city. You encountered the inner circle of the city, and you saw a little bit of the edges, there’s a wall that is built on the inside of Thar Amphala. This was the same wall that contained the threshold crests that caused it to transport from the Shadowfell to the Prime Material Plane. You looked at the energy of this field, you’ve seen it pulse from the wall upward, like (pulse sounds) TALIESIN: We could break through. We could break the wall MARISHA: That’s right! And then we could bring in the forces LAURA: And then J’mon Sa Ord will be able to help us. Help us! MARISHA: Help us! Help us J’mon, help us! LAURA: That’s good, we go over the walls first Here’s the good thing about us bamfing to the Feywild, right. They think we left, and if we all actually stick together and don’t fuck up with this fucking ring next time, they won’t know that we’re there again. Because last time they had an idea because you guys, you know, almost died as we were going in MARISHA: Yeah I know, I remember SAM: I have an idea about Grog flying that just occurred to me. Trinket’s big LAURA: He is SAM: Trinket could be Polymorphed into something else big, like a flying eagle of some sort. And actually be useful LAURA: How dare you. If they Dispel that won’t he just turn into Trinket and he’ll fall? SAM: Yes, but with big risk comes big reward LAURA: Trinket? MATT: Trinket over there is on the side, arms playing pillow to the muzzle LAURA: Okay. Bud? If you fuck this up, Scanlan! Oh, I don’t have any more spells, do I, to do it? He can understand me, I just can’t understand him, with my Speak With Animals. Shit ASHLEY: Tell him to just shake his head LAURA: Okay. Oh, it’s 1st-level, I have a 1st-level left. Okay, here’s the thing, Scanlan wants to turn you into something that flies MATT: You hear this slight squeak of a bear fart in his direction LAURA: Good job. Yeah. Would you be willing to– are you okay with that, for the actual big– I mean, you could be up close and personal with fucking Vecna MATT: Trinket walks up to you now, and his fully grown form is a good foot and a half taller than
you at the shoulders. He comes up and gets really close and (bear breathing), and butts his head against you, and then licks the side of your face LAURA: Yeah? MATT: And sits back LAURA: Aw. You can do it. Don’t hurt him! Okay SAM: It’s a plan B LIAM: Do you have anything gnarlier than– I mean, I’m a little invested too, I’ve spent a lot of years with this bear– like, anything gnarlier than– an eagle’s cool, but like anything with spikes, or rhino armor, or anything like that? TALIESIN: Like a flying rhino? LIAM: Can you do a flying rhino? SAM: What flying things have we seen that are scary? LAURA: A wyvern MARISHA: Polymorph, I don’t know– SAM: I can’t Polymorph; I could True Polymorph Trinket and permanently make him a wyvern MATT: It can still be dispelled if it is permanent on True Polymorph, by the way SAM: It can be dispelled, just at an action? MATT: Yeah. That was an errata to the spell that I’ve discovered as the internet made very keenly aware to me SAM: Even if it becomes permanent? MATT: Correct SAM: Wow MARISHA: Then what the fuck does “permanent” mean? SAM: A simple, level three Dispel Magic can get rid of a 9th-level permanent Polymorph? MATT: Well, you have to know that the creature has been polymorphed into that form. And even then, it’s a 9th-level spell that you’re trying to dispel, which is not– MARISHA: So they have to at least cast it at 9th-level, in order to dispel it MATT: To be instantaneous. Or they have to roll against it SAM: I’m not going to waste my True Polymorph on that. Just standard Polymorph LIAM: Does that mean you could permanently do it to him, and then we cast Dispel Magic on him later to undo it? MATT: Yeah. You could do that LAURA: Yeah. Oh, so you could use that tonight LIAM: Tonight. To lock him in SAM: Yeah. But it could still be dispelled TALIESIN: He would have to burn a dispel at 9th-level MARISHA: Wait, are you talking about Polymorph or True Polymorph right now? SAM: I was just talking about Polymorph LAURA: I think Polymorph tomorrow and then use your 9th-level spell for something major LIAM: But if it’s permanent, why not do it tonight? LAURA: Because he can use a 9th-level spell tonight for something MARISHA: Because Polymorph only lasts for, like, an hour. What else you have? LAURA: As we’re doing this, we’re making the feast, because we’re about to get ready to go to bed, right? MARISHA: Nom, nom, nom, nom, nom food LAURA: Yeah, so we make our feast before we go to sleep MATT: All right. Polymorph is a concentration spell, so keep that in mind SAM: Yes LIAM and TALIESIN: Oh MATT: Yes LAURA: Oh, shit SAM: Yeah MATT: You wouldn’t have to concentrate with True Polymorph SAM: True MATT: But. Those are just the specifications SAM: What’s more important? LIAM: Could he be a baby, like a young ancient dragon? SAM: Yeah LAURA: You can turn Trinket into a dragon? SAM: Well, let’s see here. He has a challenge rating, doesn’t he, this Trinket LAURA: Yeah MATT: I will put Trinket at about a challenge rating of six, I’d say. Because he’s not a full, powerful creature; he’s a complement to you LAURA: Right MATT: I’d put him at a six, maybe. High end SAM: So monsters of a six. I don’t even know; I’ll look at the list MATT: Okay. Think about it. Regardless. Who’s casting? You said you were casting Heroes’ Feast? All right, as you set up the table, you summon forth the meal that is infused with divine energy You all begin to eat in solemn quiet, occasionally discussing plans and tactics. The delicious– LAURA: Artagan can join us MATT: Oh, he does. Don’t worry. As soon as you guys begin to eat, at the far end of the table you see the orange mane erupt from the side of table as he takes a seat. “Oh, wondrous. I appreciate “this, thank you.” LIAM: So did that live up to your expectations, then? MATT: “Hello. It was all right.” LIAM: New hobby, or–? MATT: “I don’t know. Have to try when they’re not willing. That’s a joke; that’s a joke.” LAURA: Okay. Hey, Artagan, can you look at this wand? MATT: “Which wand?” LAURA: This wand in my hand MATT: Which wand are you handing him? LAURA: It was a wooden wand from one of Vecna’s people that I hijacked MATT: It’s a war wand. It’s a plus one wand. For anyone who’s casting a spell through it, it’s a plus one modifier to DC LAURA: Oh, do you have to attune? MATT: Generally you have to attune to these, yeah LAURA: Okay. Great. All right. Thanks TALIESIN: There’s nothing special about these symbols that they wear around their necks, are they? Just since it is in your interest to keep us alive long enough to build you a portal MATT: “Well, it doesn’t require or contain any magic, if that’s what you’re asking.” TALIESIN: Yes TRAVIS: It’s just jewelry MATT: “Well, it’s a focus. It’s a divine focus for those who wish to utilize it to draw energy from “their deity of choice, and/or just a token of brotherhood.” TRAVIS: Boring MATT: “Delicious meal, by the way.” TRAVIS: Yeah MATT: “Is it yours?” ASHLEY: Yes MATT: “Thank you.” TRAVIS: So good ASHLEY: Oh, you’re so welcome
MATT: “All right. When do you intend to go back?” LAURA: As soon as we go to sleep and wake up MATT: “Well then. Sleep it is.” And he gestures over, his hand behind you, and as you look back you can see there’s a series of beds that have all constructed out of the nearby moss and vines. They grow and lift up out of the natural floor of the Feywild. As the beds form, you watch as the tethered vines and roots to the ground begin to form these dome-like tents over each specific bed LAURA: Oh, good. Privacy MARISHA: Are you doing anything? SAM: Oh, yeah MARISHA: With your thing, before we go to sleep? SAM: I mean, if I True Polymorph him, Trinket, I could do a wyvern, or a young white dragon, or– Is J’mon a brass or bronze? TRAVIS and MATT: Brass SAM: I could do a young brass, young white dragon, or a wyvern. Or I could have another Scanlan LAURA: Oh. I vote Scanlan SAM: Scanlan Two can cast Polymorph LAURA: And he’ll just hang around with us? Second Scanlan hangs around with us until what? LIAM: I mean, that is flat-out amazing SAM: We’ll see. (laughs) Or not TALIESIN: The world is ready for two Scanlans SAM: I’m pretty sure it will be apparent that he is not a real person ASHLEY: How will he know which is which? SAM: That’s true. Well, you’ll know, because, come on. This charm can’t be replicated LIAM: Nah, we need two hats or something MARISHA: Hang on, I will say, a second Scanlan will immediately clue in Vecna that there’s some trickery magic going on SAM: Sure MARISHA: Is there a way that second Scanlan can be, like, definitely hidden? So he can just be (snaps) support Scanlan? Counterspell Scanlan? TALIESIN: If we give him the Hat of Disguise, then there’s just a magical field being about a magical– LIAM: Can the Meat Man join us? LAURA: Yeah, let’s do that SAM: Yeah. He could be the Meat Man TRAVIS: No truesight? No seeing through this? LAURA: I’m sure they have truesight. Vecna’s a god. Of course he can see everything SAM: But I think you have to use truesight. It doesn’t just happen MATT: As a god of secrets, probably see through an illusion TRAVIS: No, no, on. We’re going to pull it over on Vecna. We’re fine. This is a great plan MATT: Just throwing it out there, based on your experience, even the creatures around the tower have truesight LAURA: Oh, shit. So he’s going to know even, like, he’s going to know Trinket’s not a fucking– Is that seen on truesight? Oh, no, he’s actually that animal. So he’d have to know TRAVIS: Do it, man. Do it. We’re overthinking it MARISHA: Because he can also maybe just cast support stuff for us, right? LAURA: Yeah, exactly. Fuck it. Do it! LIAM: Can Vecna just dispel the second Scanlan away? SAM: He can can certainly try TALIESIN: And he will have to burn some stuff MARISHA: And the only other thing would be, like, a second Pike to do all of the Freedom of Movement stuff, and things like that– SAM: That’s nice MARISHA: Those Counterspells, man– MATT: Just keep in mind, Counterspell can’t be done unless they’re on the field to see the spell being cast and within 60 feet. So second Scanlan would have to be in the fray MARISHA: Can second Scanlan be invisible second Scanlan? SAM: He can for a while, yeah MATT: You can. And things that see through invisibility, like a god of secrets, would probably see through it LIAM: You can never have enough Scanlan. There’s always room for Scanlan SAM: These are good catch phrases, for sure TALIESIN: Depending on whether or not you have the mount, let me know if you want to trade boots or not, since these are non-attunable MARISHA: Okay, hang on, if someone has to roll to see if second Scanlan is dispelled, do you have to roll? MATT: No MARISHA: Second Scanlan has to roll? MATT: Vecna would have to roll MARISHA: Vecna has to roll TALIESIN: And Vecna will win LIAM: You know how Vecna rolls TRAVIS: And we’re definitely doing the pillars? MARISHA: I can throw up pillars TRAVIS: No, I mean, are we, or are we not? MARISHA: Yeah LAURA: We are doing the pillars, if he’s not doing something on Trinket MARISHA: I think the pillars could be good for cover and other things. Because I’m assuming we’re– TRAVIS: Okay, cool. We’re doing the pillars LAURA: Scanlan, do something so that we can sleep SAM: All right. I need the strength of two mes to win this fight. So I’m going to drop to my knees, and Wish to the gods that there was somehow more of me, that I could somehow be in two places at the same time. I wish for more me. Me-more. Me, but more. Más Scanlan MATT: All right. As the words leave your lips, you can see Artagan himself, as he finishes the meal, leans back. “Hmm.” Like, seemingly taken aback by the power of these words you’ve spoken, as you watch as hints of nearby slowly melting snowfall that seem to have gathered elements at the base of
the trees nearby begin to slowly congeal into a form. You do realize that this is going to take you 12 hours to complete, right? SAM: Oh, yeah LAURA: So you should’ve started that earlier SAM: Shit. (laughs) MATT: Yeah MARISHA: So can we decide that earlier? MATT and TRAVIS: No MARISHA: That’s cool SAM: You guys can sleep, then I’ll sleep, you wait for me MATT: You’ll be arriving a little later than originally anticipated. Who knows what ramifications that’ll have TRAVIS: Just do it, man SAM: Sorry. It’s already being done MATT: All right, so SAM: Shit! We should have done that when we were waiting for fucking Vax! LAURA: I know! MARISHA: I thought that’s what we were doing! SAM: I didn’t know it takes that long! MARISHA: We tried. Wait, we definitely mentioned that! MATT: Simulacrum is a 12-hour casting time SAM: (whispers) Okay TRAVIS: It’s okay ASHLEY: It’s okay. It’s done LAURA: What’s done is done MATT: Over the next 12 hours, you sit there focusing on trying to press your will into this congealing snow golem of Scanlan, and watch as it slowly takes form and breathes air, and– with no equipment, of course– but has your knowledge, your spells. Eventually, the completion of the spell brings to life a secondary Scanlan, under your beck and call SAM: Oh my god. Hello, Scanlan, is it you? MATT: “It’s me.” SAM and MATT: (gasps) Oh! SAM: You’re shorter than I thought you’d be MATT: “Speak for yourself.” SAM: All right, let’s just see if you’re really Scanlan MATT: He’s already naked SAM: Oh, okay. Let’s see. I whip out my little measuring tape. One inch, by one inch, by one inch. Mm-hmm. That part’s the same MATT: “Mm-hmm. How do we know I’m not the real Scanlan?” LAURA: How do we know you’re not the real Scanlan? SAM: I think there’s only one way to find out LIAM: Sing off SAM: (singing) Naa! MATT and SAM: (singing in unison) “Naa! Molto bene, molto bene–” TALIESIN: Well, that’s everything I needed MATT: You’re halfway through your sleep LAURA: Shut up, Scanlans! TRAVIS: Isn’t Wish instantaneous? MATT: The spell is instantaneous, unless it’s copying the effect of a spell SAM: All right. This worked. Scanlan, let’s go to sleep MATT: “All right, Scanlan. Where to?” SAM: I’ll spoon you MATT: “Okay.” All right, you guys head off to your domicile LIAM: This is the last check off your list, I think TALIESIN: Some items for other Scanlan SAM: Oh, we have extra items? TALIESIN: Yeah LAURA: Oh, yeah. Other Scanlan can wear things? He’s fully– MATT: He can wear things TRAVIS: You want bracers of defense? Plus two to your AC? LAURA: Oh, yeah, put on that armor that I gave you SAM: Because he doesn’t have any of my items, does he? MATT: Nope. He is naked LAURA: Put him in the armor I gave you that you don’t wear SAM: Yes, yes, I will put him in the armor of– LAURA: Acid resistance SAM: Acid– No, I have acid, you had cold LAURA: No, I have cold now. It was– SAM: Oh, we had two acids! LAURA: Yeah, that’s what it was SAM: Yeah. So it’s acid resistance MATT: Okay. There you go ASHLEY: I have a shield of fire resistance LAURA: What about the wand of plus one, for the spells? SAM: Wand of plus one, what is that? LAURA: It’s a war wand SAM: Yeah, great. Do that TALIESIN: And then, here SAM: He’s also got bracers of defense, gloves of missile snaring, and a dragon slayer longsword? Sure, why not MATT: All right, so you got those. So you go ahead and find yourself to sleep. The rest of you, the night’s rest, if there’s any final words before the fray comes, anything you want to do to calm yourself before the final battle, now’s the time LAURA: Oh god ASHLEY: Fuck LAURA: This could be it, huh? MARISHA: This is real fucked up TRAVIS: I’m real excited, actually. Like, you know, you always want to test yourself to see what you’re made of, what is your mettle really like We’re going to find out. We’re really going to find out. Nobody else excited? TALIESIN: I don’t know if excited is the word MARISHA: There’s been a few times that we’ve all known we could die together, but this might actually be it LAURA: Oh. That’s true MARISHA: Yeah LAURA: You know what? We’re doing it for a good cause, though. Saving the world MARISHA: It’s fine. Yeah? TRAVIS: Yeah. Together, right? SAM and ASHLEY: Together TALIESIN and LAURA: No regrets LIAM: These last three or four years have been the best of my life MARISHA: Same TRAVIS: Yeah LAURA: I had a good run a few years before that, but this is pretty great
TALIESIN: I’m going to remember that you said that SAM: Last year I was a crime boss, but the last few days have been really fun TALIESIN: Everything since I met you all has felt like a dream. Even the worst of it TRAVIS: I love all of you. (snores) MARISHA: Aw, that’s so cute; he’s honest when he’s asleep TALIESIN: Would it be wrong to shave his beard, just one more time? TRAVIS: (snorts awake before returning to snoring) LIAM: We need his head in the game LAURA: Yeah. It gives him strength MARISHA: I think it’s like his focus, you know? TRAVIS: Boobies TALIESIN: One of them, yes ASHLEY: I feel like I don’t want to go to sleep LAURA: (whispers) I know. We need to, though MARISHA: Like, it’s weird to say goodnight, right? LAURA: We can totally take this guy. Fuck it We’re not going down SAM: Yeah LAURA: Yeah SAM: Yeah. He doesn’t know what’s going to hit him LAURA: Exactly SAM: We’re the S.H.I.T.s LAURA and MARISHA: Yeah! LAURA: Fuck him ASHLEY: Yeah LAURA: We’ve got other gods on our side. He’s a fucking half-ass god ASHLEY: That’s true LAURA: That’s right. And you– You’re not going anywhere MARISHA: All right. Good night? LAURA: Good night TALIESIN: In the morning LIAM: Yeah, Percy, get your rest, because your last words to me tomorrow need to be indignant and irritated TALIESIN: I’ve already planned them out LIAM: Goodnight, brother TALIESIN: Goodnight, brother TRAVIS: And we sleep MATT: All right. You all find yourselves resting, uncomfortable at first, but the knowledge and the exhaustion hitting you, eventually it takes you The dreams lead seamlessly, one to the next Memories of your meeting, of your story, of your experiences, bleeding between your fears, your victories, and the people whose lives you’ve touched and who’ve touched your lives. Of Wilhand The fall of Kevdak. To the respect of your father, and the vengeance of your mother. To climbing the destiny of the Aramente. To rebuilding the memory of one’s family And to spooning a second version of yourself (laughing) LIAM: (singing) Oh, my darling, I hunger for your touch– MATT: And knowing that you’ve taken your faith from a place of being forgotten to a newly built symbol of hope. These thoughts all mingle, as the dark of rest takes you. And as you all awake, in the center of this strange, mystical meadow, peeking through the hints of purple and orange that signify the sky that breaks through the canopy of this forest, the pools of Nala that once brought you here long ago. You all awake, the beds gone, the tents gone. You’re all lying amongst this field in a circle, around each other. As you come to consciousness, you all sit up, take a breath, feel the warmth and the knowledge of what has to be done wash over you, the shadow between two distant trees reveals the orange mane of Artagan once more, as he steps forth, his high green collar disappearing into his long sleeves, and a cloak that billows past his shoulders and loops into his back, as he almost glides effortlessly through the grass. “I take it you all “slept well?” TRAVIS: Yeah MATT: “Well, then. Time is of the essence. You’ve been here more than a day.”
LAURA: Just barely MATT: “Just know. But whenever you’re ready. I’ll see what I can whip up.” As he wipes his fingers against each other, you can see the sparkle, spiral of purples and blues and oranges and colors, causing this glow under his face and his hair as he gets excited at the prospect of seeing just how far he can tweak the boundaries of the Feywild that he calls home MARISHA: All right TALIESIN: Here we go TRAVIS: What are you holding over there? SAM: Myself. My other hand LAURA: Trinket’s back in the necklace for the bamfing over MATT: Okay MARISHA: To Thar Amphala. On the back of a titan On the Material Plane MATT: “Take them.” As you concentrate, and the spell begins to swell around you, this familiar energy begins to ride up in your stomach. You feel the butterflies take form. And as the realm begins to darken, the colors that you see, spiraling out of Artagan’s hands, begin to consume you as well And nausea takes over and you feel yourself wretched left and right, as darkness begins to swell once more and close in, the colors surround you entirely. And you feel like you’re being pushed through a window. As you all land and catch your feet, the darkness subsides, the color subsides, and you all feel immediately queasy, falling to your knees As you glance around you, you can see you stand in the rubble, the exterior of a building that has fallen long ago. You see large chunks of the secondary floor fallen inward and dust (poof) around you as your knees hit. You look up and can see the familiar green-blue crackle of the barrier above you. You’ve managed to make it on the interior of Thar Amphala. You look up to see, immediately, clusters of gloomstalkers in the distance. They haven’t quite gotten a view on you LAURA: In the building, now! MATT: You guys all dart. Make a stealth check, please TRAVIS: First roll, first roll, first roll LIAM: Natural 20 ALL: Hey! MARISHA: Good luck! LAURA: Oh, that’s good MATT: That’s one way to do it MARISHA: Oh, natural 19 ALL: Ooh SAM: Scanlan One, 19. Scanlan Two, 21 TALIESIN: 19 MARISHA: 28 LAURA: 35 ASHLEY: 18 TRAVIS: 11 MATT: Okay. This building is mostly collapsed; there’s a small alcove in the corner where part of the secondary story is still there. You guys dart into the side of it and you rest there for a minute in quiet. (nervous breathing) And you suddenly hear an impact of stone against the wall behind you. All of you guys immediately turn around and you watch as the heavy piece of stone that marks the outer part of this building is now cracked, and part of it begins to fall in. I need Scanlan One, real Scanlan, and Percy to make dexterity saving throws, please SAM: Not good. Ten TALIESIN: I’m going to burn a resolve TRAVIS: Burning it already? SAM: What? TALIESIN: I rolled really low. I want to do that a little better LIAM: So take a conk on the head! TALIESIN: Oh, fine LAURA: No, you don’t know! You don’t know! TALIESIN: I don’t know– which is why I am MATT: What are you going to do? Are you going take it or not? TALIESIN: No, I’m going to kill a resolve, one more. That’s way better! Natural 20 MATT: Okay, cool. You only take three points of bludgeoning damage TALIESIN: That’ll do MATT: Scanlan takes six TALIESIN: It’s just a resolve; I got three TRAVIS: Six points MATT: You reduced three points of damage LAURA: I thought they could be trapped under the wall or something TALIESIN: No, it was fair. I’m not in the mood for that. And resolves I got plenty of MATT: It crumples over onto you. You manage to pull away. As you turn around, you can see, right around the edge of the part of the building that’s collapsed and fallen, a gloomstalker, covered in dust, shaking its head as it attempts to stand once more. It looks like it’s been slammed to the ground, or crashed into this wall. And you can see it’s on the ground, (croaking noises), shaking its head and trying to get back up, its wings trying to unfurl As it rights its head, you see a leaping blur of black armor and red scales climb to the back of the beast, grasping the side of its shoulders as it spins back and forth, trying to shake it. You see this humanoid figure, trying to take something and throw it around its throat and its head, however, it’s just not able to grasp it around, and gets thrown off the side and to the back. You watch as the gloomstalker bucks off the assailant and begins to try and get its wings up once more, as the figure leaps up again and shoulder slams it into the wall a second time. You get a better look at it now. You can see now, standing at a pretty decent height, about a seven-foot dragonborn of red scale and black, hooked armor, bladed and angry. You see a burning fury in its eyes. Joe, if you want to come to the table, please ALL: Ooh!
(cheering) LIAM: Welcome to the table! SAM: What’s this? (cheering and laughing) JOE: Yes! TRAVIS: Brothers in arms! Yeah! TALIESIN: I like that it’s kitty-corner right now JOE: The tanks on the ends MATT: Arkhan. You’ve been trying to wrestle this gloomstalker down– You spent days here, trying to find a way to recover from the circumstances that left you here. This is the closest thing you’ve had at this circumstance, as you’ve regained your strength, and as you leap onto its back, it continues to knock you off to the side. You guys see this confrontation happening. What do you do? LAURA: Does it look like– (pained noise) TRAVIS: No, I’ll run in LIAM: Yeah, he’s attacking a gloomstalker; I’ll join in MATT: All right, so what are you guys doing? LIAM: I’m going to help this guy out and throw MATT: All right, so go ahead and make two attacks LIAM: All right. Plus one to– JOE: Wait, don’t hurt him! Don’t hurt him; I scream: Don’t hurt him MATT: Well, he’s thrown two daggers LIAM: I did, and they both hit MATT: Yes. Technically adjacent, so you do sneak attack damage LIAM: All right, I will SAM: Oh boy LIAM: Four– It could be bad. 12– TALIESIN: Oh, wow. What are you doing? LAURA: All of the damage TRAVIS: Save it for battle! LIAM: 34, 35– I can’t! It’s too late; it’s triggered! LAURA: No! Don’t do it! LIAM: 46 for the first SAM: I cover tiny Scanlan’s eyes LAURA: Welcome to the game, Joe! TRAVIS: This is what we do MARISHA: Yeah, what were you trying to do? JOE: I hope you have a healing potion SAM: Nope MATT: That’s 51 points of damage. You have 46 and four? It’s 50 points of damage. Marking that down You see two daggers into the side of the gloomstalker. It gives this horrible shrieking shout in pain and rears up JOE: Now that it’s distracted, does that give me some sort of advantage? MATT: I will say, given the pain it’s had, make an athletics check because you are attempting to grapple the entity JOE: That’s correct. All right, okay LAURA: Can we see, does it look like he’s got hands and eyes complete? JOE: That’s athletics, that’s going to be a 19 MATT: Natural 20 JOE: Is it part dragon? MATT: No. It is not. It’s considered a monstrosity JOE: Okay, fair enough. Okay MATT: That’s okay. You hear the dragonborn shout out, seeing the dagger slam into its side. What do you yell to them as they’re attacking it? JOE: Don’t hurt this thing. Help me wrestle it to the ground MATT: At which point, it now thrusts the dragonborn off of its back. He goes tumbling and rolling onto the ground, landing onto your back, and you see it– LAURA: I throw out the Rope of Entanglement. On the gloomstalker MARISHA: I turn to Percy, and I go: Who’s fighting who?! TALIESIN: I don’t know! MATT: So now I would like an initiative roll from everybody, please TRAVIS and TALIESIN: Oh shit TRAVIS: What’s that? Plus a d10 to my initiative now? SAM: Does Scanlan Two take my initiative, or no? MATT: Separately LAURA: You’re two people again! How does it feel? SAM: The best MATT: 25 to 20, anybody? LAURA: 24 SAM: Natural 20, which made a 23 TRAVIS: 22 MATT: All right. Grog– All right. Super low. All right, 20 to 15? JOE and MARISHA: 17 SAM: Oh, sorry, Scanlan Two is also 21 LIAM: Joe, you’re sitting on Scanlan Two MATT: All right. 15 to ten? TALIESIN: 12. No, really? ASHLEY: Well, would I be Pike without rolling shit initiative? MATT: Vax, what’d you get? LIAM: Eight MATT: Eight, wow. What’d you get, Pike? ASHLEY: Yes. A six MATT: All right, so. Vex, you’re up first. You’re going to use the– LAURA: The Rope of Entanglement, is what I was going for. I can’t find my– MATT: I have the sheet here. So you thrust it out It has to make a DC 15 dexterity saving throw LAURA: Yeah MATT: All right. Let’s see here– Natural one Natural 20 to natural one. Back to back. As you fall onto your back and shout that out, you go rushing towards it and you watch as this glowing, long piece of thick rope begins to suddenly wrap around this gloomstalker as it’s trying to take off again. It gets, like, a foot off the ground before its wings get pulled up to its body, and it falls back onto the ground, wrapped and restrained by the rope JOE: Great. I can do my thing now? MATT: Is anybody else going to do anything, right now?
TRAVIS: Yeah, I run up. I’m going to run up, and grab it by the head and neck and lay on it MATT: Okay. Scanlans? SAM: I’m just watching. And I turn to Scanlan Two and say: So that’s a gloomstalker TALIESIN: “Yes.” SAM: And that guy, I’m not sure what he is, but he looks really cool TALIESIN: “I know what he is. I’m not going to tell you, though.” MATT: All right, Arkhan JOE: I remove this golden-needled, five-jeweled wreath from around my neck, and I approach the beast, and I fasten it around its neck SAM and TRAVIS: Shock collar MATT: Kind of. So it’s a DC 17 TRAVIS: If it barks, it activates MATT: Five plus six, that’s an eleven. It does not succeed. You watch as the thrashing around gloomstalker on the ground begins to slowly calm down until it reaches a point where it’s not moving; it’s breathing, and you almost hear what sounds like a reverse purr JOE: Does this thing have horns? MATT: It has a series of spines along the back of the neck, but no actual horns. It has a head that flares out like a cobra, but it’s made of shadow Where the jaw is, its tongue lashes out, but instead of saliva, it gives off smoke JOE: Then I grab it by the back of the jaw, here, and I put my forehead down to its forehead, and I close my eyes, and then open them, and they turn into that thing’s eyes, correct? MATT: Mm-hmm JOE: Yeah MATT: So the gloomstalkers, they have no discernible pupil; it’s a glowing beacon of yellow-white where each eye is. And you watch as this dragonborn opens its eyes, it’s headbutted against it, and the dragonborn’s eyes now match the coloration of the gloomstalker JOE: I climb up onto its back MATT: Okay. It’s still bound by the rope. But you get up onto it now. You watch as this massive dragonborn gets up onto the gloomstalker, which is now currently on the ground, trying to right itself now, still wrapped in the rope JOE: You can release the rope now LAURA: Does it look like anybody’s noticed us? MATT: Make a perception check SAM: We’ve been fighting silently LAURA: 33 MATT: You do look and see two more gloomstalkers that have broken away from the cluster, that are making their way in your direction LAURA: Will this thing obey you? We should get inside. I let go of the rope and go back in the building so that we can hide MATT: Okay. Everyone else following? LAURA: I cast Pass Without a Trace on all of us MATT: Everyone else following suit? SAM: Yes MATT: Okay. You? JOE: Yeah. Absolutely MATT: All right. Do you leave the gloomstalker where it is and then step inside with them? JOE: Can I take it with me? MATT: If you want to JOE: I’d like to take it with me MATT: As you guys all dart inside this alcove in the building– Like, most of the roof is gone; there’s a section of roof that’s there. It can hide most of you. The gloomstalker’s a bit large, as you all cluster into the space, as it looms in (heavy footsteps) This is the second time you’ve had an allied gloomstalker this close, and it’s a very upsetting proximity MARISHA: Uncomfortable elevator at a convention MATT: Kind of. As you guys pull into the side, I’d like you all to make a stealth check, please MARISHA: Why did you wear wings? LAURA: Stealth check! JOE: If I’m on its back, does that have anything to do with my plate armor? Meaning, am I relying on some form of stalking that doesn’t make my armor clank around? MATT: Unfortunately, as you’re still riding it and it moves and shifts, there is still the plate sitting against it, so you would still be at a disadvantage JOE: Am I the only one in plate armor here? LAURA: No, she’s got plate armor ASHLEY: Nope. Clanky twins! JOE: I just didn’t want to be fully responsible TRAVIS: She has something that makes her less clanky-like LAURA: Yeah, you got your boots ASHLEY: Boots!? LAURA: Yeah, so you don’t roll at disadvantage anymore ASHLEY: Wait, wait LAURA: Yeah. You got non-clanky boots JOE: And I am at disadvantage? (sighs) LAURA: Add ten to your roll SAM: Yeah, you’re fine JOE: Okay. 20 TRAVIS: Aw, yeah! JOE: Disadvantage MATT: By the way, there’s your stat sheet for the gloomstalker JOE: Yes! MATT: It’s taken 50 damage, so you can note that JOE: Can I feed it a healing potion? MATT: When you have a moment you can, yeah JOE: Yeah. Trust me. It’s all going to work out What could go wrong? LIAM: You were jumping at him, and punching him in the face. I thought wrong. I do that sometimes ASHLEY: Do you have a name for him? SAM: Do you have a name? ASHLEY: Do you have a name? That’s true. I just love animals SAM: We can kill you any second, so be scared of us, if you’re an evil person JOE: You could. But I know these two SAM: What? MATT: And there’s a moment of recognition for Percival and Keyleth MARISHA: Oh, holy shit TRAVIS: No way MARISHA: Oh. It’s been, like– two years? TALIESIN: At least two years JOE: At least. Percival, you’ve aged. Keyleth, you still look the same
MARISHA: (giggles) TALIESIN: She got a haircut LAURA: Oh, shit. Are you going to let him do that to your girl? MATT: It’s at this moment you hear two heavy impacts from nearby rooftops TRAVIS: Okay. Maybe not the best reunion time MATT: As you all stay as silent as possible, waiting, one of them takes off. And you can see it arc barely over the opening, but seems to be doing a wide sweep, out of visual range. The other one appears to be stalking from rooftop to rooftop, not far from you. (thudding) (sniffing and croaking) It leaps and lands on top of the small part of the roof that’s above you guys. It holds A few rocks tumble around you as you’re quietly in that space, hoping. (thudding and croaking) Its head peeks over the edge and looks straight down, right into all of you LAURA: Oh, God darn it MATT: What are you doing? LAURA: I shoot an arrow into its eyeball MATT: Okay. So as soon as the head passes over, make your attacks. You’re close enough to get one swipe up, because you’re on the back of a gloomstalker. So as its head peeks down, you can get a strike at it TRAVIS: How high up? MATT: It’s about, I’d say, 12 to 15 feet up LAURA: 35 MATT: That hits JOE: That’s going to be a 31 MATT: That hits JOE: Damn, that’s a Vox Machina number. About damn time. That’s what level 17 will get you. All right. Yeah MATT: All righty. So LIAM: 20, 21, and a miss MATT: Okay. So those both hit LAURA: 25 damage MATT: 25 damage, all righty LAURA: Oh, and I get to do it again? MATT: You do LIAM: Is his proximity close enough that either of these guys are within five feet, or anybody’s within–? MATT: No. Oh, I’d say Arkhan probably is LAURA: 18? MATT: 18 damage? LAURA: 18, does that hit? MATT: That does hit, yeah LAURA: Okay SAM: Come on, insta-kill this thing MARISHA: I know. I don’t want to have to do anything LAURA: 18 MATT: Okay JOE: This is the paladin dilemma. I think I’m going to save the spell slots. But I am going to swing at this guy MATT: Go for it JOE: Okay, I’m going to swing my battleaxe, Fane-Eater MATT: Okay. So you get two attacks with that JOE: Great. Oh, okay. Well, one was 31 MATT: Yep JOE: Oh, that’s going to be nine, plus 14. That’s 23 points of damage on the first one. And then second attack is going to be a 23 MATT: That hits JOE: And that’s going to be 21 points of damage on the second MATT: All right. And with that, as soon as its head peeks over the edge, two arrows (whooshing) under its throat, and you watch as an axe cuts part of its head clean off, as it tries to make a noise, but the blade is caught in its throat and prevents the air passage. As Fane-Eater is yanked out of the side, you see the jagged edge of the axe arc back, causing blood to splatter across the back, the wall behind him, as Arkhan goes in with a second swipe. And with one clean cleave motion, the head falls and plummets into the ground. The rest of the gloomstalker tumbles in, lifeless, into the rock. And you see as it lands, its wings sprawl out and slowly the body begins to dissolve into black smoke and shadow SAM: I run out and I say: Wait! Don’t kill it! I’m just kidding. It’s fine TALIESIN: Vox Machina, may we introduce you to Arkhan? SAM: Arkhan? MARISHA: Arkhan SAM: Hi MARISHA: You look like you’ve, you know– You look like us. You got more stuff. We’ve acquired more stuff, over the years. That’s cool SAM: How do you know this gentleman? TALIESIN: We did some work, ages ago MARISHA: Yeah, forever. Before we really knew any of you JOE: The temple of Shumash LAURA: How did you get here? MARISHA: It was a crappy swamp. It was good times Yeah MATT: Technically it was a desert, but yeah MARISHA: It was a crappy desert. Good times SAM: Well, it was the worst kind of swamp. It was one with no water MARISHA: It was, yes. The driest of swamps, yeah TALIESIN: What are you doing here? JOE: That’s a long story. Weeks ago, we wound up attacked by a cult, my companions and I. This cult was led by a Death Knight. And a sorcerous woman SAM: Lady Briarwood MARISHA: Sylas? JOE: And then Vecna followed. And we were ambushed. My companions and I were marked for death. They were all destroyed. And I watched that Death Knight burn the closest thing I’ve ever had
to a brother. And he cut the still-beating heart out of our goliath. And then these buzzards came to pick my bones, thinking I was dead. But I wouldn’t die. The queen had another plan for me SAM: The queen? What kind of queen? JOE: I hold up my shield MATT: Make a religion check, Scanlan SAM: Hm, that’s no good. 11? MATT: You have passing knowledge that the symbols that adorn both around Arkhan’s throat and the shield that he holds up are that of the Scaled Tyrant, Tiamat, which is the patron god to chromatic and evil dragons all across the world LAURA: Oh, he’s evil. That’s evil. That’s the evil dragon. Potentially SAM: You serve this queen? TALIESIN: He’s our kind of evil. It’s fine JOE: I understand that because of my dogma, we belong to groups that would never mix, but I can assure you, if you help me get revenge on the one that killed my friends, I swear to you, I will fight for your lives with the fury of a man who is already dead TALIESIN: I think we have a surprising amount already in common TRAVIS: Good pitch SAM: Devil’s advocate: maybe not. I don’t know, maybe– LIAM: I mean, I’m just going to do an insight check on principle JOE: I make the gloomstalker snarl at the two Scanlans MATT: (snarls) LIAM: Yeah, I rolled an eight. He checks out MARISHA: Quick question. We didn’t roll our temporary hit points for our Heroes’ Feast MATT: Oh, you did not. You should do that MARISHA: Can we do that? Or does Pike do that for us? MATT: Yeah, Pike, you roll the temporary hit points MARISHA: For all of us, right? It’s an additional 2d10, I’m pretty sure MATT: So roll 2d10, Pike. And everyone who was present for that– LAURA: Oh, yeah, you should give us a speech. How long does that last? MARISHA: Oh, I totally should’ve given a speech LIAM: That’s a ten-minute one, yeah? MARISHA: No, it’s a short rest thing. But it’s a thing that lasts until– LAURA: Later, then MARISHA: Yeah. I should’ve done that before, but I’ll do it next time SAM: Whatcha doing over there, Johnson? ASHLEY: I’m just looking for my tens! LAURA: Oh no! LIAM: Two ones MARISHA: Two ones? ASHLEY: Wait, are these 12s? LAURA: No, those are tens MATT: All right. So you guys gain two additional hit points, to your max hit points LAURA: That is such a bummer JOE: Is that everybody? MATT: Yeah. You weren’t there for the meal, unfortunately. It’s from earlier LAURA: It’s okay; the meal didn’t do a lot, apparently ASHLEY: So glad I’m here to be useful MATT: However, everyone does still have their advantage on wisdom saving throws and you’re immune to fear. Which is pretty huge MARISHA: And poison MATT: And poison. The hit points are more of, like, a bonus. You’re fine LIAM: It was slim fast. Slim feast MATT and MARISHA: Slim feast! JOE: Can I feed this thing a healing potion? MATT: You may ASHLEY: I really thought I was going to roll two tens JOE: Greater? I think greater MATT: If you have, yeah– JOE: I have a greater MATT: So that would be 4d4 plus four ASHLEY: I rolled the wrong, I actually rolled the wrong tens JOE: That’s nine; that’s not great SAM: No, that’s not great. We’ll figure it out later TALIESIN: We know Lay on Hands and some such JOE: Well, I have them, I just don’t want to blow them TRAVIS: Wait. You can’t die? SAM: Is that true? Wait, when did he say he couldn’t die? TRAVIS: Well, he said, like, “She thought I was dead, but my queen–” SAM: He said he would fight like a man who is dead, but he wasn’t– TALIESIN: It was a metaphor, Grog. It was a metaphor SAM: Oh, no, you’re right LIAM: Do you mean actually; have you died? JOE: It’s kind of a colloquialism for religious folk. You know what I mean? Like, I hit a death save LAURA: Oh, tight, tight, tight, tight SAM: I touch him to see if he’s real JOE: I blow smoke out of my nostrils, like a little fire SAM: Kind of squishy. Really soft TRAVIS: Thank god he’s wearing that armor, huh? SAM: Yeah. Pudgy JOE: I’m going to pump 30, then, back into this gloomstalker. Plus the nine. So there was, what, 51 that came off? MATT: 50 points of damage were taken off JOE: 50 points, so I put 39 back on, so that’s 11 off MATT: Yep, you got it TRAVIS: When do we want to do Freedom of Movement stuff? Not yet? LIAM: That’s short term LAURA: Right before. That only lasts for an hour Here’s the thing. Do we go for the outer walls to take out the shield first? Probably. Once we go in, we’re going in SAM: The outer walls of the city? LAURA: Of Thar Amphala, yes SAM: How are we going to take down entire walls without being– LAURA: We don’t have to take out the walls. We have to break a couple of the crystals MARISHA: Yeah, those crystals that we started to break when we were in the Shadowfell TALIESIN: If just do a hit and run, we can cause so much chaos that all of these gloomstalkers are going to be busy dealing with everything in the air
LAURA: Hey! You remember our old plan of just set everything on fire? Let’s set everything on fire! MARISHA: Yeah! In fact, that’s actually a brilliant plan. We could disable a crystal, maybe I could light a signal, distract people. While they’re distracted, we make it to the next one TALIESIN: And as long as we’re close to that one, they don’t know that we’re here. They can’t see us JOE: What are these crystals? SAM: We don’t know where these crystals are! TALIESIN: They’re all around the outer wall LAURA: We saw them when we were in the city before MARISHA: Yeah, in the Shadowfell. Remember, we jabbed at one, and decided against it SAM: All right TALIESIN: If we break these crystals, this could help– MARISHA: Everything TRAVIS: Does anyone know that you’re here? JOE: Vecna. The female wizardess LAURA: She knows? JOE: And the Death Knight TALIESIN: And if they’ve been watching, he just vanished. We should run now JOE: But they thought I was dead. They left me for dead LAURA: So they don’t necessarily know you’re in the city JOE: I think they’d be surprised to see me LAURA: Okay. All right, cool MARISHA: Let’s move LAURA: Okay, stealthily, let’s try to make it to the outer wall so that we can cut out some of these crystals MATT: Okay. First off, make a perception check as you glance out to see how close you are to the nearby wall LAURA: 30 MATT: 30, okay. You notice you’re on a different part of the city than you were previously. If the city’s moving forward, if you consider the direction that the titan is traversing forward, you guys were to the back and right side of Thar Amphala. Like a clock; if twelve o’clock is where it was traveling, you guys were around four or five o’clock. Looking now at the layout of the city, you’re closer to 11 and 12 right now And you’re maybe about 200 feet from the nearest wall. You can see the curvature of the dome is pretty striking from your current position. And you can see the pulses, the waves. Imagine like a reverse waterfall of energy shooting upward. And every now and then, there’s a burst LAURA: Does it look like there’s an area that the pulses are brighter, along the wall? MATT: Yes. You do see the pulses aren’t universal There are certain locations, about six of them throughout the city, that you occasionally see them (bursting), and they spread out LAURA: Are we close to one of those pulses? MATT: You can maneuver there. It’s not directly behind you, but you can eventually get to that location, yeah LAURA: Okay. I see where one of the crystals is; let’s move towards that TALIESIN: We’ll get Grog to smash it to smithereens TRAVIS: I smash (stumbling) mitheens ASHLEY: You do. To mitheens TRAVIS: (drawn out) Mitheens TALIESIN: You’re so good at punching walls MATT: All right. I would like you all to make a stealth check. Are you all walking on foot? Are you taking the gloomstalker? JOE: I’m on top of the gloomstalker SAM: Is it walking? MATT: Yeah JOE: It’s walking right now? MATT: It’s currently walking, unless you want to hover with it SAM: You got to stay within 60 feet of us? 30 feet? MATT: 60 feet JOE: I’d like to hover MATT: As you guys are staying lowkey, Arkhan is currently riding against the back of this gloomstalker as it’s hovering in the air above. And the stealth check you’re going to be rolling is going to be to see whether or not anything notices you on the back of a gloomstalker. The gloomstalker is not going to register on the radar of any of the current watching creatures, because it’s part of its posse for the moment JOE: So is this with disadvantage for plate armor, or not? MATT: I would say no, because it isn’t a movement-based stealth check; you’re just trying to stay still JOE: With the bonus LAURA: Plus ten JOE: Love it. Good. 31 MATT: Shit, all right. You’re just clutching the exterior of it, trying to stay low. You’re pulling into your armor like a turtle shell, since it is black. And using that to try and blend into its form SAM: And can we kind of stay under the shadow of the gloomstalker? MATT: You guys can move along SAM: Oh, 29 and 20 TALIESIN: 34 MATT: Keyleth? MARISHA: 32 MATT: Vax? LIAM: I rolled a four, so it’s 37 MATT: Fucking rogue LAURA: 29 ASHLEY: 18 TRAVIS: What? ASHLEY: No, I did it wrong TRAVIS: Oh. 19 MATT: Okay SAM: His head has muscles MATT: Okay. A five and a six. All right, so. As you guys begin to maneuver through the streets, dodging from building to building, on the outskirts of Thar Amphala, thankfully, the streets are a little more sparse on the edges. You also notice as you’re traversing, and this is interesting JOE: It’s his head shot LAURA: I would have liked if he had signed it JOE: It’s Arkhan’s commercial head shot MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You need to print one in black and white LIAM: (deep voice) If I’m good at reproductions JOE: This is, like, work in the office look MARISHA: (laughing) That’s such an L.A. joke, yeah
MATT: All right, so. As you guys are maneuvering, Vax, Vex, and Keyleth as well. You have the high passive perception of the group. You notice that the droves of undead that have been clogging the streets of this city, and the clusters of cultists that have been running about busily, running from location to location, with some work on their midst. The undead, who were just scattered and wandering, are now unified and moving in patterns They’re now being driven by some intent. Whereas once they were just scattered amongst, and in a holding pattern, now they’re maneuvering with solid purpose, away from the sides of the wall, and the shields, which enables you to go relatively unnoticed. But you’re seeing them now, gathering towards similar tunnels to the one you came up in. You can see dozens and dozens of zombies and skeletons, and the occasional robed cultist, both warrior and mage alike, all beginning to make their way down into the titan, at various points in the city SAM: Making their way down TALIESIN: They’re going to go attack the city LAURA: We got to get these shields down so that Vasselheim can actually have– MARISHA and LIAM: A fighting chance TRAVIS: Let’s find the crystals MARISHA: All right, let’s do it MATT: As you guys make your way around the edge of the city, you follow these pulses. They occur every two minutes or so, so you have to keep an eye out for it until one happens and then reorient your direction, but you taking point on this, you lead everybody, darting from place to place. Man Rolling shitty-ass perception TRAVIS: That’s okay, Matt MATT: That’s okay for you guys TRAVIS: Let it happen MATT: Eventually, you come around one cluster of exterior buildings. It looks to be what was once a manor, that was converted to a fortress. Like a small exterior fortress to this inner circle of Thar Amphala. You curve around and there you see, familiar to you from once before, the walls that surround the exterior of this inner sanctum of Thar Amphala, and the basis of this field that contains the entirety of the city. Looking at the wall, you can already feel the dangerous vibration of this field being so close. There’s this violent hum to the air, that with each pulse hits this certain frequency of sound that causes your ear to tweak just a hint. And you can see violent waves of green-blue magical energy, (pulsing) up the side of the wall, like a very powerful reverse waterfall. Shooting up, to gather and maintain this field. You cannot see the crest. The crest was visible from the outside of the wall. And the energy field is being produced on the outside of the wall. You’re on the inside of it. But you can gather the base location of where this burst is happening to get an idea of loosely where it might be LAURA: How thick is the wall? MATT: You don’t know LAURA: And we saw the crest before because there was a doorway in the outer wall MATT: Correct. Yes LAURA: Is there any kind of doorway around us? MATT: You glance over to where the door was, below the crest, before, and you can see the opposite side of a door, currently, yes. It is shut. And appears to be made of hard wood with– It’s iron bar reinforced crosshatch LIAM: Well, we can try the door, and then if that doesn’t work, Grog can make a new one LAURA: Yeah LIAM: Let me check out the door TRAVIS: I’m not really so keen on making doors, as opposed to knocking them down. I’m a craftsman All right. I’m just, me LIAM: I’m going to check and see if the door is trapped LAURA: How are you with doors? JOE: Pretty good TRAVIS and JOE: Yeah! TRAVIS and TALIESIN: Sh! LIAM: 26 MATT: Thankfully only rolled a nine LIAM: 26 for investigation on the door MATT: The door is locked, but it is not trapped LIAM: All right. Let’s open it up JOE: I hand Grog some jerky from my pouch Hungry? TRAVIS: Oh, fuck yeah. Don’t share it LIAM: 28 MATT: 28, okay. So the door (clicks). And it’s interesting, as you put your lockpicks in to feel the tumblers, you can feel the metal vibrating Like the entire door is just (buzzes). And as you hit it, and the door swings open, almost like something’s been pushing it on the opposite side It swings open and slams on the inside of the frame, and there you’re looking at a wall of violent green arcane energy. (whoosh) Coasting by– Actually, this is blasting downward right now, because the threshold crest, as you recall, was above the doorway, in the wall LAURA: Can we see it? Like above the doorway? MATT: No, it’s flush LAURA: It’s like on the other side? MATT: It’s on the other side and up on the wall And currently where the door opens, there is violent magical energy slamming down LAURA: Do you think it’s possible to, like, punch up on the archway and knock the crystal down?
LIAM: I pick up a rock about that big, walk ten feet back, and throw it at the energy MATT: It hits the field, and there’s a violent flash in that section, about a foot radius around where it was, and the rock shoots past you. Make a dexterity saving throw LIAM: Ooh, that’s not good. 16 MATT: 16? Strange. Wow! That’s the first time you’ve failed a dex save in a long time! LIAM: Yeah, I rolled a three MATT: Oh, thank god LAURA: So happy about it MARISHA: You are fallible MATT: You take six points of bludgeoning damage That’s a d4 plus two. But it literally pelts you in the side of jaw and the neck, and you turn around and feel it. And you can feel the pulsing of the blood begin to flow into the bruise that’s going to be there tomorrow LIAM: I literally just got choked to death 18 hours ago, so I’m not sweating it. What’re we going to do? TALIESIN: Grog? Let’s start drilling up LAURA: Try punching up SAM: All right, but if we interfere with that forcefield and it somehow hits us, we’re going to be hurting TRAVIS: Oh, yeah. Not only should we back up a little bit, except for me, we should also have an area that we’re going to run to, right? Because I’m sure this will bring the noise MARISHA and LAURA: Is there a house nearby? MATT: There’s about a 20 foot gap between the wall and any nearby building, and there is the large, fortress-like manor that you saw earlier. I mean, I say fortress-like manor; it’s not a huge house It’s two story and a decent size. But it looks like it’s been reinforced in the walls, like somebody had designed for it to be a place to hold off some sort of a stand, probably from the war with Pelor’s army, long ago. That’s the closest thing to this doorway LAURA: Okay, we can get ready to run there However, we’re staying within 60 feet of you while you’re punching TRAVIS: Arkhan’s going to stay, just in case it needs, like, a double– LAURA: A double punch TRAVIS: Yeah. You know MATT: It’s probably more than 20 feet, actually; it’s probably like 30, 40 feet LAURA: 30 feet away? MATT: Yeah JOE: How many gloomstalker riders are in the sky above? MATT: I mean, overall? Make a perception check JOE: Okay. Yikes. Eight MATT: There’s a lot of them TRAVIS: Sky’s clear MATT: Like, there’s a lot of them by Entropis JOE: Gloomstalker shit hits me in the face MATT: Yeah. But you do notice that there’s– where previously there wasn’t, there’s a cloud gathering at the top of this dome funneling down onto Entropis TRAVIS: Actually. Well, hold on. You got to stay here, right? Because of the– LAURA: That’s what I said; I’m staying within 60 feet of you TRAVIS: I would like to rage MATT: Okay TRAVIS: And I go: Tiger Uppercut! and I just punch the roof of it MATT: Go ahead and make an attack LIAM: Destroy TRAVIS: Yeah, destroy. 23 MATT: That hits. Go ahead and roll damage, d4 plus your strength modifier TRAVIS: That is 15. Just by itself. So MATT: Times two. That’s 30 points of damage with a punch SAM: One Punch Man MATT: Fucking siege, man. That’s good. As you slam into it, you guys watch as, right above the doorway, in the door frame, the entire wall– Just a spider crack shoots up about 20– The wall is about 30 feet tall or so. Actually, probably not It’s about 20 or so feet. And it cracks up to the very top, and you watch as large parts of it break off and fall, but it hasn’t completely collapsed But it’s sustained some very serious damage TALIESIN: One more and we run. And take cover TRAVIS: One more? LAURA and ASHLEY: Yeah MATT: I also need you to go ahead and make a constitution saving throw, please LIAM: I’m going to walk up behind him– JOE: He’s within ten feet of me. He gets a plus four LIAM: And plus two from me MATT: Awesome. Well, they don’t stack LIAM: Doesn’t stack? MATT: The plus four is what you get LIAM: Then I’m backing the fuck up MATT: From the aura JOE: Aura of Protection. Provided by Tiamat! TRAVIS: 24 MATT: 24? All right. You suffer– it would be 14 points of force damage, reduced to seven and you’re pushed back 20 feet, but you’re not knocked prone So as you slam into it, there’s a burst of arcane energy out of that section of the doorway and wall that slams into you. You go spinning past, spiraling, and you catch yourself on the ground about 20 feet away, in the middle of the open there. Catch yourself LIAM: Feet skidding, like a Jackie Chan film MATT: Still don’t fucking see you, okay TALIESIN: It’s a very loud– MATT: I’m rolling so shitty today SAM: Yeah, well. You’re going to roll well when it counts JOE: I’ll take a shot MATT: You take a shot as well? JOE: Yeah MATT: All right. So as Grog spins back and catches himself, you walk up to this doorframe. With your axe in hand? JOE: Yeah MATT: Go for it. Roll an attack
JOE: Okay, that’s going to be a 19 MATT: 19 hits LAURA: 19 hits a wall! MATT: It’s an AC of 18 on the wall SAM: The wall has an AC of 18? TALIESIN: The wall has my armor class. That’s really horrifying JOE: With my axe– MATT: It’s solid! LAURA: It’s a magic wall JOE: That’s going to be 20 points of damage MATT: 20 points of damage, that’ll do it. So as Grog catches up, and look up, you watch as Arkhan rushes forward, and with a giant leap, cleaves the axe into the stone. As it does, the archway collapses downward. First off, make a constitution saving throw TRAVIS: I’m standing there like a catcher, ready JOE: Con save? All right. Not big money. This is not. It’s going to be more whammy than big money. That’s a nine on a con save MATT: That’s not going to do it. Okay. You suffer 16 points of force damage, and you get blown back into Grog’s direction and knocked prone. So you catch, but the impact actually pushes you back five feet, and he falls face first on the ground There’s actually a dig in the ground, like a groove where the impact is. At that point, as you watch the wall crumble and collapse, you see, suddenly dislodged from its position, the about two and half foot wide threshold crest stone that is embedded in the wall there crumples downward and falls out of its space. As it does, there’s a series of bursts of vibrant arcane energy that shoot up the wall, causing this side of the wall to glow exponentially brighter than the rest of the shield. At which point, like a large slice of pie, one sixth of the dome falls inward, and for the first time since you’ve arrived, you see the non-filtered sky above of the darkened clouds that have completely encased the upper atmosphere of Othanzia. You also glance past where it crumbled, as the city is at a slight angle forward, the way it’s placed on the front of the titan, and you look down and see, immediately around, the familiar sight of the Vasper Timberlands that surround the exterior of Vasselheim. And there ahead, not more than maybe a few miles off, you can assume from this distance, you see the singular mountain pillar that Vasselheim is built around, and the outer wall in sight MARISHA: I don’t know. Do we keep going? Do we try to get down some more? JOE: Alderaan is in sight! TRAVIS: We’re coming around that planet TALIESIN: We’re going to run MATT: Everyone make a perception check, please TRAVIS: I got this, guys; don’t worry JOE: Famous last words MARISHA: Opal die, don’t fuck me! LAURA: 27? TALIESIN: 27 SAM: 20 JOE: Was this passive perception? Because if it was, then I rolled a natural 20 of passive perception. The natural one MARISHA: 18 TRAVIS: Three ASHLEY: 12 MATT: Okay. Those who got over 20: There’s this small victory, and this moment of joy, and accomplishment, that is immediately washed over by the realization of how close you are to the city The two hours that you were gone, still better than a full rest, however, has put you within proximity of the city. And you hear this familiar, large, airy, reedy, stretched screech in the distance. You glance over, and you see in the distance, barreling down in your direction, a skeletal dragon familiar to you not far before MARISHA: Move, move, move! SAM: I don’t think we’re going to be able to move LIAM: We can hide, though TRAVIS: We’re going to hide? LIAM: We can’t run LAURA: At least get in this building, there was that encased part, right? SAM: We’re all in the same enclosed space? LIAM: Ring MATT: There’s a tower-like structure, and then there’s that building that was reinforced to be a– TRAVIS: If he spots us, we scatter and spread, but TALIESIN: We are not going to scatter and spread We’re going to stay together no matter what LAURA: We’re going to stay within 60 feet of each other TALIESIN: There is no scattering LAURA: Within 60 feet of us. It’s super important! MATT: If you all are rushing into this building, everyone make a stealth check, please JOE: Is this a hovering stealth check? MATT: If you want to still stay out in the open, that is up to you. They’re all darting into a building, so the choice is yours. You can stay with your beast JOE: But he’s one of them. So I can kind of leave him outside somewhat MATT: He is. You’re on top of him JOE: Yeah, I am MATT: So. Do you want to try and blend into his form?
JOE: I’d love to. I think that’s what I want to do MATT: Okay. Then make a stealth check LAURA: If you’re within 30 feet of me, you still get plus ten MATT: You would not be within 30 feet of her once she enters the building. So MARISHA: Can you do the cool John Wayne thing, and go underneath of him, and hang on his belly from the saddle? JOE: Yeah. That’s what I’m trying to do MATT: Make an athletics check JOE: 28 MATT: As this happens, you immediately climb down to the underbelly of the gloomstalker. To maintain hold on it, because its physical form– and it’s interesting, now that you’ve been this close to it, and you’ve been wrestling it, you feel it’s partially corporeal. There’s something about its physicality that is almost gelatinous. Like it’s made up of a combination of shadow and physical will. And as you clutch into it, your fingers dig and begin to seep into it, almost like a cluster of tar. But it holds you fast, and you’re there underneath. Make a stealth check, without disadvantage, but this will– LAURA: Is it a boy or a girl gloomstalker? JOE: I’m close enough to know MATT: Gloomstalkers are actually sexless. They have no natural– JOE: (whispers) It seems to be asexual. Oh, do I have a little–? MATT: You do not JOE: (groans) LAURA: Oh no JOE: This is going to be an 11 MATT: Okay. Good to know. The rest of you guys? JOE: That was a shitty roll TRAVIS: Oh, 16. No, 18 LAURA: Add ten TRAVIS: I did ASHLEY: 22 LAURA: 33 LIAM: 46 MARISHA: 27 TALIESIN: 30 SAM: 19 and 30 MATT: Okay LAURA: No, 43 MATT: Okay. As you guys all dart into this building, you all quietly listen outside, as you maintain, hovering in place. The skeletal dragon (croaking) swoops down. As its wings catch itself, the wind billows through the space in the center here. You can see a bunch of the dust and pebbles and loose rubble that’s been built up around here, and the wall that was left behind just gets kicked up, and spins a brief dust devil in the vicinity The skeletal dragon there, still flying. Make a perception check LAURA: But we’re within 60 feet of him, right? You said we weren’t within 30 MATT: He’s kept relatively close to the building LAURA: Okay JOE: So I didn’t get the plus ten LAURA and MATT: No LAURA: But you’re still hidden from view from Vecna JOE: Perception. That’s not terrible. That’s a 16 perception MATT: Okay. As soon as the dragon gets close– and you’ve seen it flying about, up in the stratosphere area of this dome before– you can see there are still bits of flesh dangling off of the bones. And it is a familiar-colored flesh LAURA: (gasps) TALIESIN and SAM: Oh, no MATT: Whereas you and your adventuring party had traveled here before, this risen dragon form seems to have been torn from the corpse of the mount that brought you to this city JOE: Oh, no MATT: You see, as the skull of its body, its eyes crackling bright blue-green energy, there on the back of this dragon, you see two humanoids standing on its back. You see a dark armored male with pale skin, with a well-kept beard and short hair, with his arm around the waist of a female, who’s currently clutching onto the back of its bones. You can see the woman, in a red robe that’s being blown up, her hair bound in the front, wild behind, as she has a necklace bauble that hangs around her neck, crackling blue-green energy. As she has her hand forward, she glances around at the space, angrily. “What!?” (heavy breathing) Looks over at the gloomstalker. “Oh. What have we “here? Is this your doing?” SAM: Maybe she doesn’t see you. Maybe she’s talking to the gloomstalker JOE: I control the gloomstalker and make him screech MATT: (screeches) “Adorable. Wouldn’t you say so, honey?” And the man behind her goes, “Oh, quite “Well, I’m a fan of taking thorns out of my side Is it time we do a bit of surgery, darling?” And the woman goes, “But of course. Oh, how I’ve missed you.” And she nuzzles into his neck a bit, and turns around. The dragon lands onto the tower across the way, facing in the direction of the gloomstalker, and it inhales. And you watch as it begins to breathe in, all of the shards of bone
matter that have been scattered across the streets of the city begin to whip up and spiral into its ribcage, like a blender. As it pulls back (roar) and as the dragon’s mouth opens it releases a blast of bone shards that arc out in front of you You and the gloomstalker, each, I need– SAM: Into the earring I say, this is our chance, we leave him as a distraction and we go. They don’t know we’re here, we can run! MATT: You and the gloomstalker make a dexterity saving throw please LAURA: But here’s the thing, we’re not going to have a better chance to get them away from Vecna Should we attack them now? TRAVIS: Plus we have one extra ally. Two! LAURA: We can attack them now, away from Vecna JOE: You said dex save? MATT: Correct JOE: I actually have an advantage on dex saves that I can see MATT: There you go MARISHA: Maybe wait for them to land SAM and LAURA: Are they landed? SAM: Are they hovering? MATT: They’ve landed on a tower right across from the building where you guys are LAURA: How far away is that? MATT: Let me show you (cheering) TRAVIS: (shouting) Oh this is it! Oh no! SAM and ASHLEY: (airhorn sounds) LAURA: Oh my god MARISHA: So wait, is it Vorugal? Is it Thordak? LIAM: No it’s his mount MARISHA: It’s your old mount? JOE: I rode in on a white dragon named Obakala (groaning) TALIESIN: (shouting) What? No! ALL: Ooh LAURA: And they’re on this? SAM: How did you know we would be here? LAURA: How did he know we would be here? MATT: I had a few possibilities LAURA: Oh, it’s okay, Briarwoods down MARISHA: Bony dragon! ASHLEY: They’re dead! We did it! MATT: If that was the way it went you guys would have been dead a long time ago MARISHA: Wait, did you put a cool little acrylic thing on there to make them mountable? MATT: I did MARISHA: That’s pretty dope MATT: Currently riding your gloomstalker JOE: I’m on top of my dude? MATT: Yep JOE: Thank you John Paul and everyone at Gale Force Nine for my sweet-ass mini that just arrived from the UK today! LAURA: So we’re in this building? JOE: Well I was kind of on the bottom, but we’ll let it– MATT: Yeah well I’m putting it there because that’s the range of the blast right there LAURA: Shit. Maybe he rolled really well on his dex save MATT: All right, so you guys, let’s go ahead and figure out your placement here. You guys rushed into this building here ASHLEY: There’s a window LAURA: There’s windows! Okay. Oh my god MATT: You guys rushed around and into this side, so you guys were in the base floor here LAURA: Okay MATT: Where do you want to be? LAURA: Can I run upstairs and look in that window? MATT: Sure. So I’ll put you at the window there LAURA: Okay MATT: Who else is placed where? MARISHA: I’ll be downstairs SAM: There’s no way to see out downstairs? LIAM: There’s no windows on this side SAM: There seems to be some windows on this side, right? MATT: There’s a couple of small slits, but they’re facing out this way LIAM: And then would you say we could use the attic windows? It’s up to you MATT: That’s more for flavor. There would be no attic windows. It’s been reinforced, so there’s been placed armor on the bottom, the only windows that are available are the ones up top and even then only have arrow slits ASHLEY: Because we can’t see around there, I’m going to use it as a reference photo MATT: Fair enough. Vax, are you up with your sister? LIAM: Yes I am LAURA: And Trinket is out MATT: All right, so you bamf Trinket out LAURA: I bamf Trinket out but he’s down by Grog MATT: Okay, we’ll put Grog– we’ll say that you were probably down in this building being as quiet as you can. Percival, Scanlan, Keyleth, Pike ASHLEY: I’m behind my boy Grog. My boy Blue! TALIESIN: There’s that other window MATT: Up on the second level TALIESIN: Yeah MATT: Okay. So we’ll put you up there ASHLEY: Guys, do not worry! We have an extra plus two to our hit points! It’s going to be fine! TRAVIS: Most amazing 2d10 roll ever MATT: All right, Scanlan SAM: I mean I’m in there somewhere MATT: I need a second Scanlan MARISHA: Is Keyleth up top? Keyleth’s up top, okay SAM: I think I would be near the window where I could kind of see– what’s your name, Ar-Can? JOE: Arkhan SAM: Arkhan? JOE: Yeah MATT: We’ll say for the purposes of this– SAM: He can just move with me, it’s fine MATT: This will be tiny Scanlan SAM: Sure MATT: Scanlan where are you? SAM: Near the downstairs windows where I can see– LAURA: This is so intense! MATT: Right here there’s small slits, they’re all armored up SAM: Oh they’re armored up, all right, so then I’m upstairs MATT: All right, okay. We’ll put that there. So we’ll say for the purposes of this you guys would be–
LAURA: I can’t believe we’re fighting the fucking Briarwoods again! TALIESIN: That’s going to be fun JOE: That’s not the Death Knight? MATT: No JOE: It’s her dude? MATT: Sure. So TALIESIN: Yeah, that’s Lord Briarwood MATT: Now that we’re set, thank you for your patience. So what did you roll, you and your gloomstalker? JOE: Well, me get not– him not– it not so good I had a 27. Gloomstalker 11. I’m trying to be– give the proper gender-specific SAM: They JOE: They? SAM: They JOE: Rolled an 11. Well, actually no. Wait, hold on. They would benefit from my Aura of Protection MATT: That’s true JOE: So they would have a 15, I would have a 27 MATT: That’s with their plus six? The gloomstalker gets a plus six dexterity saving throw JOE: Oh, plus six! I’m looking at the dex modifier which is plus three MATT: Right. Says under saving throws, dex plus six. Wait, does it? No, it’s dex plus eight Sorry LAURA: Oh shit TRAVIS: Take it JOE: So then, it– they had a 20. I had a 27 MATT: All right. You both succeeded on the save so you take half damage which is only 26 points of necrotic damage TALIESIN: That’s solid MATT: Sorry, piercing damage, not necrotic. So as the bone shards go slamming into each of you, that completes the dragon’s turn. Now everybody please roll initiative (groans) TRAVIS: Okay. Come on, come get some! LAURA: Oh god, oh god, oh god JOE: You said 60, Matt? MATT: 26 JOE: Yeah, I got that right for there. 26 MARISHA: Don’t fuck me, Gil! JOE: Do I roll for the thing? MATT: Yes, you would JOE: Separately of me MATT: Separately. I’ll say for the ease of it let’s make it on your turn. There’s a lot going on here. All righty LAURA: In-game hour, not this game hour MARISHA: Right. No MATT: 25 to 20 TRAVIS: Thanks to Kas, 27 LAURA: Oh shit. 24 for me MATT: Right. 25 to 20? I just said that, right? LAURA: 24 MATT: Yeah. 20 to 15? TALIESIN: 18 JOE: 17 MATT: Nice JOE: For me and they TRAVIS: 18, 17? MATT: 18, 17? JOE: Yes, yep MARISHA: Do you always do this or is this new for you? TRAVIS: I always do this ASHLEY: 15 for Pike MATT: Nice JOE: Is there a cricket in the studio or is that part of the sound effect? MATT: No, that’s in the studio TRAVIS: It’s just not that intense of a fight MATT: 15 to ten SAM: Ten MARISHA: Yeah, you hear it? TRAVIS: Vax, what were you again? LAURA: 24 MATT: All right TRAVIS: Vax LAURA: You were looking me in the eye when you said it TALIESIN: Cricket’s initiative is sadly 30 MATT: Keyleth, what did you get? MARISHA: Six SAM: So did Scanlan Two LIAM: Hateful eight JOE: So you roll separate initiatives for you and Scanlan 2? SAM: No, this is new for me. This is new MATT: So is that everybody? I believe that’s everybody SAM: Matt, just manage the ten people and three creatures on the field right now and you’ll be fine MATT: I know. Be good. All right. First up first, Grog, it’s you TRAVIS: It’s me. Already raging MATT: Yep, you’re already raging TRAVIS: Let’s see, there’s a window, right? Can I run upstairs? MATT: You are now up with these assholes. Right there TRAVIS: And I jump out the motherfucking window MATT: That you can. (heavy impact) TRAVIS: Is that my full 50? MATT: I’d put that at about 35, I’d say. You’ve got 15 feet still TRAVIS: Awesome. So I’m going to double dash with the spider boots that Percy gave me and I’m going to run up the tower and just go straight, yeah MATT: Well, one dash TRAVIS: One dash MATT: So you get to the top of the tower and you are now base to base with the dragon LAURA: Did you just fucking go father than 60 feet away from me? TALIESIN: No. Technically radius-wise– MATT: Radius-wise he’s close to you still TRAVIS: Yeah, why you making me feel dumb? LAURA: Just remember that because it’s a thing during battle. They could, but we don’t know. We could kill them before he knows JOE: So that means if I get up next to this thing, I would be in range of this 60 feet? LAURA: You are within 60 feet right now SAM: Just do what you do. It’s Vex’s job to keep us in radius JOE: What bonus do I have? LAURA: That doesn’t give you a bonus, it just keeps Vecna from seeing you TRAVIS: Am I within melee of that skeleton dragon? The bone dragon? MATT: You are within melee of the dragon TRAVIS: Perfect. That’s my turn LAURA: The only way we’re going to get the drop on him is if he doesn’t actually know we’re here SAM: He’s going to know we’re here. They’re going to tell him LAURA: We’re going to kill them TRAVIS: With my bonus action can I make it a frenzied rage? MATT: You may. That’s your turn, Grog. Vax, you’re up
LIAM: I got an eight. I’m way at the bottom LAURA: I had a 24 MATT: All right, so Vex? LAURA: Can I lean out the window and attack? MATT: You may LAURA: Okay, I lean out the window, and can I see Delilah? Can I shoot at her? MATT: Sure LAURA: With my sharpshooter, she doesn’t get any additional cover or anything. Okay, so I’m going to sharpshooter Delilah with one of my needle arrows that I’ve been hanging onto for a gajillion years. So that is a 25 to hit MATT: 25 to hit? Yeah, even with Shield, she couldn’t stop that. That hits LAURA: Yes! Okay. Good SAM: Is she aiming for the dragon? TALIESIN: No, Delilah SAM: Big D LAURA: Is that sneak attack because she didn’t know I was there, technically? Oh, Grog’s standing right there! MATT: Grog’s in melee with the dragon. I’ll say because she was not aware of you, they were only aware of him, it’s sneak attack. It’s not a crit; it’s not a surprise attack, but you get sneak attack LAURA: (counting) 31 MATT: 31. All right, 31 points of damage LAURA: Oh, no, 41 because I was sharpshootering MATT: Okay LAURA: And then that one definitely doesn’t hit ASHLEY: But it wasn’t in the thing LAURA: I know, but it still was a roll MATT: What is it? LAURA: It’s 17 MATT: 17? Nope, that misses. As you lean through the window, you release the first arrow, and as Delilah’s up there, both clutching the necklace and has her hand out with this wand, you hit her hand with the arrow. (snarls) Looks over and looks down at the window, right towards you, and there’s a moment of recognition as she sees you. As you fire the second arrow, she dodges it and goes, “I remember you.” LAURA: (scared noises) I’m going to use my bonus action to hide MATT: Okay, so you duck off to the side of the window LAURA: Not that it matters, but I’m going to roll for stealth. That did nothing. 21? Nope, 31, because I still haven’t cast Hunter’s Mark MATT: Okay. Good to know. All right, that ends your turn. With that, it is now Delilah’s turn She rolled a 19 for initiative LAURA: Okay, so it’s Grog, Vex, Delilah TRAVIS: I don’t know where Vax is. I forgot his number LAURA: He’s eight. Percy what? TRAVIS: Percy, Arkhan, Pike JOE: It’s Arkhan TRAVIS: I get all names wrong MATT: All right, she is going to point her finger down at the wall where all of you guys are, and a thin green ray streaks out from her finger LAURA: She’s disintegrating the wall? MATT: Seems to be JOE: I don’t like the phone TRAVIS: I know. When there are too many dice to roll, the phone comes out LAURA: Oh no MATT: I’m just confirming TRAVIS: The deliverance of the death? The method chosen? MATT: The size of the space that it can disintegrate. There we go TRAVIS: We’ve got a dragonborn paladin. We’re fine LIAM: Could you ring up Tiamat and have her help with this dragon thing? MATT: This entire wall right here LAURA: That’s true; you could turn the whole thing MATT: This entire wall is disintegrated in place and now reveals entirely Vex and Vax LAURA: I’m like– MATT: As she pulls her finger back and the wall turns to dust around you, you hear her say, “I’m “sorry, honey, but no.” LAURA: Oh, hello there. I didn’t see you ASHLEY and MARISHA: Oh, hello! MATT: It is now the dragon’s turn. Let’s see if it gets its breath attack. It does regenerate. The dragon (wingbeats). You get an attack of opportunity TRAVIS: I’ll make it reckless MATT: I should have put tape on the bottom of them. That’s my fault SAM: We have tape. We could get tape MARISHA: Is there gaff tape in the house? LAURA: Man, I really wish we had some tape right now! MARISHA: I know there’s a row of it back there JOE: Dear Tiamat: Send tape LAURA: Did you get the attack? JOE: Dear Tiamat: It’s Arkhan. We need Scotch tape TRAVIS: I believe it’s Arkhan.
MATT: As the dragon (wingbeats), you get an attack of opportunity on the dragon TRAVIS: It’s a 34 MATT: 34? That hits! MARISHA: Yeah, get that roll of gaffer tape MATT: Thank you kindly, Mr. Brian Foster MARISHA: (mispronouncing) Brian Foster BRIAN: It’s a janitor’s keyring of tape LAURA: Use the gaff tape. It’s the best JOE: This thing is on the ground now? MATT: It is hovering right above the ground. It’s trying to get down into the space of the wall that’s currently exposed. Please pass the tape over here? Okay. How much damage is that, Grog? TRAVIS: This dragon would be considered undead, yes? MATT: Yes TRAVIS: So with the sword’s 2d10 slashing damage to undead, that’s 32 points of damage MATT: 32 points of damage to the dragon. Nice. So as it swoops up, the dragon takes one arc with the blade, and as it streaks across, it slams into part of its foot, and you watch as the bone splinters upon impact with the Sword of Kas. As the dragon lands, it brings its head down into the gap where the opening is and arches forward. As it does, it fills the entirety of the space. It inhales a second time. You watch as all the bits of bone spiral up into it. It regenerated for the second time SAM: Is this an attack roll that it’s about to make? MATT: No, it’s a saving throw on you guys’ part As it releases this torrent of bone shards and rock and whatever it can pull up into its chest and releases it, I need everybody in that room: both Scanlans, Keyleth, Percival– TALIESIN: Do I not have cover? MATT: Cover’s not going to help you on this, unfortunately. It fills the whole space JOE: Should’ve rode in on a horse MARISHA: What are we making? Dex saves? MATT: Dexterity saving throws, guys MARISHA: This doesn’t give us spell resist, right? SAM: Scanlan Two is going to use Cutting Words to reduce the damage MATT: Okay MARISHA: That’s all right. That’s good SAM: Dex? MATT: All right SAM: Scanlan One: 18. Scanlan Two: 25 MATT: Both succeed. 18, barely TALIESIN: 18 MATT: Succeeds MARISHA: 17 MATT: Barely missed it LIAM: 26. Evasion means zero LAURA: 31 MATT: 31 succeeds. All righty. The only person to take full damage on this is Keyleth, right? Sorry Double-checking on the bard ability Cutting Words SAM: Can reduce damage by d12 MATT: Roll a d12 LAURA: On all of us? SAM: Five. Five less LAURA: That’s good MATT: That is 49 points of piercing damage to you, Keyleth MARISHA: 49! MATT: The rest of you take 24 LAURA: That’s minus the five? MATT: Yes MARISHA: Minus 49? I’m at 94 MATT: It fills the space there, and you feel every ounce of exposed skin and flesh has been hit with a thousand needles. That ends its turn. Percival, you’re up TALIESIN: So I can gather my wits, there’s an angry Delilah with a wand, clutching a weird thing around her neck. There’s a Sylas with what I assume would be a brand new sword MATT: Probably TALIESIN: And they’re sitting about how many feet up on a dragon right now? MATT: I’d say about 15 feet TALIESIN: Let’s have a little fun ASHLEY: Let’s have a little fun TALIESIN: All right. Oh, good, and I have an escape route. That’ll do really nicely. This is going to be fun. I’m going to Bugs Bunny this lady. First thing I’m going to do is I’m going to take a shot– MARISHA: Don’t look down TALIESIN: Why? MARISHA: Never mind TALIESIN: Oh, no. That was good. It took me a second. I’m going to take a shot with Animus. Boy, I’m nervous. I’m going to burn a point of grit, and I’m going to make her drop her wand TRAVIS: You’ve got this. Focus in. You got it MATT: Roll for the attack TRAVIS: Walk in the park TALIESIN: That’s a 31 to hit MATT: That’ll hit TALIESIN: Let’s make her drop stuff. It’s a strength saving throw MATT: Natural five. So as she’s holding the wand out with the hand, (gunshot, grunts). She glances back, and as the smoking gun is there, she goes, “I certainly remember you.” TALIESIN: I missed you, too, darling. I still do damage on that one, I believe MATT: Her hand is now covered in blood, and you can see one of the fingers looks heavily damaged LIAM: Grog does not count in melee of the dracolich, right? It’s just toys MATT: Grog is not in melee TALIESIN: That’s nine points of damage, plus five points of psychic, so 14 MATT: Okay. 14 points. Got it
TALIESIN: For my next trick, I’m going to burn another point of grit. Let’s push Sylas ten feet Another 31 to hit MATT: That hits TALIESIN: So let’s take a little damage and do a little psychic. I do not like this die, I’m getting rid of it. It’s only nine points of damage plus two points of psychic MATT: So 11 to Sylas TALIESIN: So now Sylas has to move ten feet back MATT: No save right? TALIESIN: No save MATT: He gets blasted off the back of the dragon ALL: Yes! TALIESIN: (Woody Woodpecker laugh) TRAVIS: I thought it was Bugs Bunny, but you did Woody Woodpecker TALIESIN: Woody Woodpecker certainly has more shade JOE: Is this creature under control to the point where someone takes damage and has to make a control save? TALIESIN: We don’t know MARISHA: I mean if it used to be yours– JOE: It was mine MARISHA: I don’t know JOE: But it’s not anymore LAURA: Now it’s dead ASHLEY: Maybe you can try to get through to it MATT: So he gets blown off and lands prone on the ground TALIESIN: For my next one, let’s push Delilah ten feet for my final trick. That’s a 28 to hit MATT: Shit, that hits TALIESIN: Sorry, man. It’s my best trick and I burned a lot of it. 15 points of damage plus four points of psychic plus ten feet. Take some fall damage MATT: Put her behind the dragon. Actually both should be behind the dragon LAURA: Did they take damage from falling? MATT: They did. They both took 2d6 each, five points of bludgeoning damage each TALIESIN: So for the rest of it I’m going to use a bonus action to run a heal. I’m going to give myself 19 points back. I’m going to run downstairs. I’m heading towards that back door MATT: That ends your turn, Percival. Arkhan, you’re up JOE: I would like to rage TRAVIS: Did you rage? JOE: Yes! (cheering) LIAM: Sorry audio team SAM: The testosterone in his group just went from a half to one MATT: Did you say you went into a frenzied rage earlier? TRAVIS: I did MATT: Okay JOE: Now, question. If I fly past the dragon to Delilah do I give the dragon an attack of opportunity? MATT: Yes, you would JOE: I have to go through this thing. I’m going to fly the gloomstalker right up to this thing Gloomstalker pulls into range and it makes two attacks on the undead Obakala MATT: Go for it JOE: Oh, terrible. Actually terrible. That’s terrible. So that’s going to be a 13 and natural one MATT: Both miss, unfortunately. Its claws streak out in front of it and unfortunately scrape against the bone to no effect. But you have your turn JOE: Now it’s me LAURA: That’s an awesome– Is that your Wyrmwood box? JOE: This is mine, yes. They do those specials Those one of a kinds that you can buy LAURA: Oh, oh well (laughter) TALIESIN: Next campaign ASHLEY: I have an idea JOE: So I get advantage on my attacks because I’m raging. This is the first time I’ve ever raged MATT: If you’re going reckless attacks you can JOE: Reckless frenzied rage MATT: Then yes you can JOE: Yes. Okay, great MATT: You’re going frenzied rage as opposed to regular rage? JOE: Frenzied does– Yes TRAVIS: You have to hold it JOE: Hold? Oh because I’m not MATT: He used his bonus action to rage JOE: I used the bonus to rage in the first place MATT: Right JOE: Great! That first one is going to be a 33 to hit
MATT: That hits ASHLEY: Yes! JOE: And this thing is undead? MATT: Correct LAURA: Yas, Queen Tiamat! JOE: I’m going to pump a 3rd-level Divine Smite into it. Which is– bear with me, now TRAVIS: We don’t do math fast ever JOE: 2d8 for the axe. 2d8 for 1st-level Divine Smite. Three more for– MATT: 2nd, 3rd-level and undead. Correct ASHLEY: All of it! TRAVIS: Dump it, dude LIAM: Unload JOE: So that’s seven SAM: Math! (laughter) JOE: It’s going to be 49 MATT: 49 points of damage on the first hit. So as you rush up and the Gloomstalker is scratching towards it, you rush with a giant arc. You watch as Fane-Eater’s blade springs forth these darkened spray of colors, red, green, black. Every chromatic dragon’s power thrust into the blade as you slam it into the undead dragon. Watching bones splinter and break from the blast of dark energy JOE: Love it. Second attack MATT: Go for it JOE: That’s a good one too. That’s going to be 29 Same thing, 3rd-level Divine Smite, 7d8 (counting) 47 LAURA: Kill that dragon MATT: As you pull the axe back you arc a secondary time. This time with the sound of a union of four different dragon cries, the fifth one being your own. As you slam the axe a second time, hitting the edge of its clavicle, it carves through and breaks. You can see part of the bones shatter and reform but still broken and not in the same way It’s a serious round JOE: Just a hint, a tiny hint, of remorse for having to kill this thing that I helped raise ALL: Aw LAURA: That’d be like if I had to fight undead Trinket TRAVIS: Legendary action incoming MATT: Sylas Briarwood is going to move his speed Would you hand me Sylas, please? TALIESIN: He’s prone MATT: He’s prone, so has half it. He moves through. He gets partway through the dragon, we’ll say. So he’s about there. That ends your turn? MARISHA: Sylas is up and moving? TALIESIN: Sylas is up and moving MATT: End of your turn? JOE: That’s all I got MATT: All right. Sylas’ turn. Sylas, seeing you come up and destroy the dragon, grins, climbs up the side of the dragon, jumps onto its thigh and jumps in the air towards you, holding a giant blackened greataxe in his hand. (groans) He’s going to go ahead and make a strike at you. Oh, you know what? No. He’s not going to. Sylas instead, axe in one hand, grabs the side of the skeletal ribcage, hanging off, looks up at you. “You seem rather strong.” And looks you dead in the eyes. I need you to make a wisdom saving throw LAURA: No! Oh my god no! Do not get turned! TRAVIS: Does he have advantage on wisdom something? LAURA: No, he doesn’t because he didn’t have the feast SAM: Can I Cutting Words? MATT: You already used your reaction, buddy SAM: One of us has MATT: It’s true SAM: Scanlan Prime steps up MATT: Cutting Words only– You can’t give a bonus to somebody’s saving throw SAM: Okay, then never mind MATT: You can reduce an enemy’s saving throw SAM: Got it MATT: Through Mythcarver JOE: Straight up roll. Here we go. Natural 20! (screaming) MATT: Oh shit TRAVIS: In the clutch JOE: I stare him right in the eyes. What would have happened? MATT: He would’ve charmed you and you would’ve had to start fighting them TRAVIS and MARISHA: No! MATT: As he stares at you, you feel this cold presence consume the back of your mind. And you feel drawn to him. It’s this force of charisma and drive, and as you begin to lean forward towards it
you feel this (thump) in your holy symbol and as you glance you break the gaze for a second and look down. And you see the multi-colored fury of Tiamat reach up and block and obscure the vision from him. And as the flames burn off you look up and the presence is gone. And he looks at you with a frustrated glance JOE: Yes! Rage! MATT: He’s going to use the rest of his movement to dart back around the side of the tower TALIESIN: How much movement does he have left? MATT: He used a legendary action to get up and get his movement, then on his turn he got his movement TALIESIN: All right. No, that’s a good use of a legendary action MATT: That brings us to Pike ASHLEY: Can I get upstairs? Stay hidden somewhere’s enough? MATT: Sure. You get to about where the twins are ASHLEY: I’m going to cast Beacon of Hope. Choose everyone that I see MATT: Everyone within 30 feet that you can see gets affected. That you can see, does it say? ASHLEY: Choose any number of creatures within range MATT: Which is 30 feet? ASHLEY: Yes MATT: You’d be able to see Percival down there ASHLEY: I can see Grog MATT: Grog is farther than 30 feet LAURA: Can you see Arkhan? MATT: Yeah LAURA: Okay, good MATT: Arkhan’s in direct vision LAURA: What does this do, again? ASHLEY: You have advantage on wisdom saving throws and death saving throws. I’m also, as a bonus action, going to cast Sanctuary on Vex MATT: Sanctuary is a bonus action? ASHLEY: It’s a bonus action LAURA: What does that do? Okay, okay MATT: Sanctuary means that if something tries to attack you it has to make a wisdom saving throw to see if it does so or not TRAVIS: It’s what Earthbreaker did MATT: End your turn, Pike? ASHLEY: Am I able to get hidden around the wall? MATT: Your movement would’ve gotten you just up to the stairs at that point because you had to climb up it. At the end of that turn, swooping down, you hear two impacts on the roof above you. You hear the growling, tearing sound as the long dry rotten wooden rooftops that are above you guy get pulled open by two gloomstalkers that’ve joined the fray TRAVIS: Toothless? TALIESIN: Do they count as undead? MATT: They do not count as undead ASHLEY: Is the roof off of it? MATT: Now the roof is open. Its damaged bits and parts of it are fallen inward. You guys can move around but they have visual on you, but that’s all they can do this turn. It took their full movement and action to break in. That’s going to end their turn. Scanlan, you’re up. Scanlan One SAM: Scanlan One turns to Scanlan Two and sings a Song of Healing MATT: Scanlan Two as in the– TRAVIS: Which one are you? Prime or Two? SAM: I’m Prime right now MATT: A simulacrum can not be healed, except by– SAM: Ever? MATT: They can be repaired SAM: But not healed with a healing thing MATT: Correct SAM: Or a potion MATT: Correct LAURA: How do they get repaired? Is it like a Doty situation? MATT: Kind of ASHLEY: Once they’re gone they’re gone? MATT: Yep SAM: Then never mind that MATT: You would know this, having known the spell and the significance of its creation. If it is damaged you can repair it in an alchemical laboratory using rare herbs and minerals worth a hundred gold per hit point SAM: Oh boy TALIESIN: Can Scanlan Two heal himself? MATT: No, he can heal other things LAURA: How damaged is Scanlan Two already? SAM: A little ASHLEY: Wait, from what? MATT: The skeleton dragon breath SAM: All right. It’s all good, guys. We’re going to be fine! Then Scanlan One will heal himself with a bonus action Healing Word MATT: Okay SAM: And then he’ll grab Scanlan Two and Dimension Door behind the dragon
MATT: Oh shit LAURA: What are you doing? MATT: Both of these guys appear behind the dragon Right behind it? SAM: On the ground LAURA: Do you know Sylas and Delilah are right there? LIAM: By Delilah or here? SAM: Back there LAURA: Sylas is right here. Right next to Sylas? SAM: Yeah LAURA: You want both of you to be right behind Sylas? MATT: I’m allowing you guys to move things. Thank you LAURA: Do you want melee range, or do you want back ten feet? SAM: Back ten feet. That would be great MATT: All right, so that’s your action and bonus action TALIESIN: You can move SAM: Wait, this was Scanlan One MATT: Scanlan Two hasn’t gone yet. Scanlan Two is at the very end, with Keyleth SAM: Scanlan One will walk around the side of the thing MATT: There you go. All right. Vax, you’re up LIAM: I really am? Oh my. Okay MATT: Actually, at the end of the turn, Sylas is going to use another legendary action. He got them back, actually, because he used it before last turn. So he uses his first legendary action to head up LAURA: He can climb up walls? MATT: He runs up the side. (impacts) He glances down, looking towards where you are. All right, that’s going to bring us to Vax’s turn LIAM: Yeah, okay, so if I get to the very edge there, am I in range of Delilah on the ground with Sharpshooter? Cover doesn’t do much, except full cover MATT: Yeah, she would have cover in this circumstance, but you avoid it with Sharpshooter, so you can LIAM: And am I within 60 feet over there, about? MATT: Yes LIAM: Okay, I’m going to throw Whisper at her, and she’s down, so I have advantage. That is a 27 to hit MATT: 27 to hit hits LIAM: And I’m going to bamf there MATT: She’s prone, so yeah. You have disadvantage on the attack against her LIAM: What, because she’s prone? MATT: It’s a ranged attack. You don’t have advantage against her because there’s nothing giving you advantage LIAM: Her being prone doesn’t give me advantage? MATT: No, her being prone, against ranged attacks, it’s with disadvantage. Roll a second time LIAM: That’s much worse MARISHA: But it cancels out LAURA: Because of Sharpshooter MATT: Sharpshooter means he ignores cover. Doesn’t give him advantage on the attack roll MARISHA: That sucks MATT: Hold on, what was that one? LIAM: 18 MATT: 18 technically would hit. She’s going to use Shield as a reaction to add plus five to her AC She’s on her back and sees the dagger and goes (ping) and deflects it off LIAM: All right, second attack is a natural 20 TRAVIS: Really? LIAM: Yeah. With Whisper, she has to make a saving throw with a DC of 18 or become frightened of me for a minute, on a crit MATT: What was the DC on that one? LIAM: 18 MATT: 18? She has a plus ten wisdom save, so that’s going to put her at a 20 LIAM: All right. (counting) LAURA: That’s a great way to roll LIAM: 72 MATT: 72? LIAM: Yeah, it’s a crit. Double the dice MATT: Right, but it’s not sneak attack, though LIAM: Oh, sorry, so. 32. Thank you MATT: No worries TRAVIS: Wow, your reverse math was super fast just then. That would have taken me five minutes MATT: All right LIAM: And I’m going to bamf there on it MATT: Okay LAURA: It’s fine LIAM: Don’t worry. And with my bonus action, I’m going to throw my third dagger up at the wall. Can I throw Whisper again? Is it like quick draw, or does it have to change daggers? MATT: Technically, I’d consider it to change dagger, generally, because you’re throwing them so fast LIAM: All right, then instead I’m going to disengage, and I’m going to dart back between the Scanlans MARISHA: Between the Scanlans MATT: All right, that ends your turn, Vax? TRAVIS: Keyleth MATT: At the end of your turn, Sylas is going to use his second legendary action LIAM: Wait, she used a reaction to knock the dagger away
MATT: Sylas LIAM: She used Shield, which is a reaction, so she can’t hit me with an attack of opportunity. Never mind MATT: That’s not what this is. Sylas is using a legendary action. This has nothing to do with Delilah LAURA: You’re talking about your disengage. Don’t worry about it MATT: Sylas is going to use his second legendary action at the end of your turn to take a swing at Grog with his Greataxe of the Eclipse LAURA: Greataxe of the Eclipse? MARISHA: Wait, Delilah or Sylas? LAURA: Sylas MARISHA: Okay MATT: That is a 21 TRAVIS: That hits MATT: That is 14 points of damage, reduced to seven, and I need you to make a wisdom saving throw, please TALIESIN: With advantage TRAVIS: With advantage. Oh, wait. That’s a d10 Natural 20 (relieved noises) TRAVIS: First one was a three MATT: As the blade sinks across you, you resist the impact, but you feel this cold sensation across the wound that begins to spill across your body. You angrily, in your rage, flex against it and manage to withstand and shrug off the effect That ends that. Next up is Keyleth and Scanlan Two SAM: Hey MARISHA: Hey, Scanlan Two. Are you just as charismatic as Scanlan One? SAM: I’ve got all the words to make the girls like me MARISHA: Okay, I don’t care. Okay, Keyleth is going to try to do a one-two punch here. She’s going to move forward and then does she see Delilah? MATT: Make a perception check. I’d say probably, actually. You watched her get knocked back; you’re fine MARISHA: Okay, I’m going to reach out and do an Entangle spell right under her MATT: Okay MARISHA: Unless she can make a strength save versus my spell shit MATT: That is a four plus one. No MARISHA: Fail, so she is restrained, and then I’m going to run, and I’m going to use my Mantle of the Tempest to jump, and then trying to be dope, here, in mid-air, I’m going to change into an earth elemental and try and grab onto the bone dragon and see if I can snap his neck in the process. Grapple the bone dragon’s head MATT: Okay. Entangle is an action? MARISHA: Yes, and then I’m running and jumping and grabbing for the rest of my movement JOE: Do we need some more tape? MATT: Actually, I can finally use the layer over here LAURA: Do you want me to get the tape? MATT: All right, you leap over. That’s the rest of your turn. After entangling her, you run, leap, and as the wind from the mantle picks up, you watch this gust of wind lift her. Make an athletics check LAURA: To try to land on the dragon? MARISHA: A straight athletics? Yeah. (whimpers) 11 MATT: Okay. Not too bad. That’s enough. It was maybe a 15-foot jump at this point, and it’s tripled because of your mantle, so you leap and land, transforming into the elemental and grappling onto its back. All right. That ends your turn, Keyleth. Scanlan Two? SAM: She’s grappled now? MATT: She is, yes MARISHA: Yeah. Fuck her shit up! TALIESIN: She’s prone and grappled MARISHA: Prone and grappled, and not for a very long time SAM: So if we hit her, it automatically hits, right? MATT: Physically. You get advantage on attacks against her SAM: Is Bigby’s Hand a magic attack or a physical attack? It’s a melee spell attack MATT: It’s a melee spell, so you get advantage on the attack roll, yeah SAM: Okay, then I’ll change my plans and I’ll do that. Scanlan Two will cast Bigby’s Hand at level-6 and pound her really hard. Shit JOE: Is that a Philip Seymour Hoffman Happiness reference? (laughter) SAM: Is that 6d8? Or 8d8? Bigby’s Hand; I always forget MATT: It’s 5th-level, and you’ve cast it at 6th, correct? So it’s an additional 2d8 to the punch
SAM: And it starts at 4d8? Oh, so it’s only 6d8 JOE: Would you like to borrow some d8s? SAM: Yes. You know what? I’m going to do it at level-7, then MATT: You already said 6th SAM: Okay. That’s fine. All right, so a bunch of d8s MATT: You have to roll to hit first, so d20 with advantage SAM: 17 plus 11 MATT: Yeah, that hits, so roll your 6d8 SAM: Yeah. One, two, three, four, five JOE: Or you can use the Smite dice SAM: I like these. 29 MATT: All right SAM: 29, and then I guess, as his bonus action, he’ll inspire Vax, who’s not even here MATT: Sing to the space where he was SAM: Scanlan Two only knows the songs of Scanlan, so he will sing, weirdly hollowly: (singing) When I get that feeling, I want Clarota healing (laughter) SAM: He only knows the songs that he already knows! TRAVIS: I told you, it’s the jam MATT: All right, so when he gets back, give him the d12 SAM: And then he moves. He ducks back behind there. Yeah, just peeking out a little so he can see where Bigby’s Hand is MATT: Okay. At the end of your turn, Sylas is going to use his last legendary action to move his speed without provoking opportunity attacks. He leaps off the side and lands right next to Delilah MARISHA: Does he get entangled? Because he did just land in difficult terrain MATT: He’s not entangled, I don’t think, because he wasn’t there for the casting. Difficult terrain means he moves across at half MARISHA: He’s in difficult terrain MATT: Okay. Good to know MARISHA: I have rocky ground. That’s all I have MATT: All righty, so entangled… okay, yeah. Got it. Cool. That ends the legendary action. Grog, you’re up TRAVIS: Can I jump to the top of the bannister here so I’m looking down at old tangled-up Delilah. (sighs) May I leap off the tower and straight onto Delilah’s prone body? MATT: Sure. Make an athletics check SAM: So romantic LAURA: Feet stomping her chest? MATT: That’s easy enough. Make an athletics check, actually, in case something goes horribly bad. You are raging, so you get advantage TRAVIS: 25 MATT: Okay. Easy enough. At that height, you take eight points of bludgeoning damage, reduced to four, and (impact) you land, arcing over her, both feet to each side of her, and you’re standing, looming over her body as she’s wrapped up in vines, going (grunting) TRAVIS: I fucking hate this dead bitch. And I raise the sword and start swinging down in these huge arcs at her. The first two attacks at her MATT: Okay. As you pull the blade up, the voice goes, “Yes. Her. She’s part of the web. Her. Her!” And you give into the fury. Go ahead and make your attacks TRAVIS: Are they with advantage because she’s prone? MATT: Correct. Well, she’s restrained TRAVIS: So not reckless. Natural 20 (cheering) SAM: She’s going to die LIAM: Butcher that motherfucker! TRAVIS: Should I roll the second attack? MATT: Roll the damage first. She’s hurt, but she’s not terrible. Yet JOE: She’s about to be terrible MATT: Yeah TRAVIS: (counting) 21 plus 14. Help me. 35? LAURA: 35 TRAVIS: 35 MARISHA: 21 plus 14? Yeah TRAVIS: 35, okay. So that’s those. Let me make sure I’m doing this right. Oh, that’s before the modifier LAURA: 35 times two now? TRAVIS: Just 35 LIAM: Modifier goes on at the end ASHLEY: What is it? TRAVIS: 51 LAURA: What do you get for the crit on Kas? What do you get for the crit? That’s why I’m asking if you double your dice
TRAVIS: No, I mean my brutal critical. I roll the damage die, an additional– MATT: You roll the damage die, double that, add the modifiers, and then the additional damage MARISHA: And you’re raging right? TRAVIS: Two times, yeah MARISHA: Plus your rage damage, don’t forget to double that TRAVIS: Two damage dies at this level MATT: We’ll see– JOE: This is that crazy new sword MATT: Three, at 17th level TRAVIS: Three? MATT: Yeah, so 3d10 additional LAURA: Oh my god, so 51 plus 3d10 MATT: Correct MARISHA: And is that doubled too? LAURA: No MARISHA: Okay SAM: That would be crazy TRAVIS: 62. I rolled pretty low MATT: Okay, so as you bring the blade down, with this horrible screaming hiss– LAURA: That’s one hit? MATT: Yeah, 62 points of damage. The blade jams into her chest, and as you twist it she screams, and the blood from the wounds sprays out in the middle of the air, freezes, and then slips into the blade as it’s sucking up the blood. She’s like (grunts) entangled, and she reaches up and grabs the blade, and begins to start pulling it out of the wound, she’s (choking) as blood begins splattering up around her mouth, but she’s still alive TRAVIS: Did you want it out? Here, let me help you out (yells) and put it back in! MATT: Roll again TRAVIS: That is a 32 MATT: Okay, roll damage LAURA: I like it when the music stops, we’re like (hyperventilates) TRAVIS: 24 MATT: 24. You jam the blade in a second time, and gash across and it carves open this part of her chest, and you can see the blood spatter out. The bones are exposed, and she’s on the ground, shaking. She’s hanging on by a tether, and her eyes are going wild, and she glances over, and her hand goes out. And you can see Sylas, who’s right next to her, his eyes are wide and he’s reaching out to grasp for her hand LAURA: (gravelly) Chop her hand off! MATT: Is that the end of your turn? Oh, you’re frenzied raging? Right TALIESIN: Oh no. Yeah! MARISHA: Come on, come on Grog! TRAVIS: I was going to do something to Sylas but fuck it, we’re going to hit her SAM: (whispered) Chop off her hand LAURA: Chop off her whole arm TRAVIS: 33 to hit MATT: That hits, roll damage LAURA: (singing) Please die Deliah, we want you dead TALIESIN: Third time’s the charm TRAVIS: 23 MATT: 23 points of damage? Are you rolling extra undead damage on this? On these attacks? Because she’s not undead TRAVIS: Nope, nope. 23 plus– I wasn’t even adding– I was so excited about the sword damage I was forgetting my rage damage MATT: Right, but you rolled 3d10 there TRAVIS: I did, yeah. The d10 plus 2d10 slashing damage to undead right? MATT: She’s not undead though TRAVIS: Oh, she’s not? MATT: No TRAVIS: Oh shit MATT: You’ve been adding that to all the attacks? Okay, noted. Roll– TRAVIS: I figured she was dead, then not dead– MATT: Roll 4d10 for me right now. I’m going to retract that from the damage she’s taken TRAVIS: 22 MATT: She’s still wounded, but she’s not hanging on by that thread. Okay, so the damage you rolled for that attack? TRAVIS: 24. But I hadn’t added my– LAURA: So do your damage again because that– MATT: Roll the d10 and add your modifiers TRAVIS: Okay fair enough. Shit, I’m so sorry MATT: It’s okay LAURA: He wasn’t doing his rage modifiers, so you could add that then, potentially? MARISHA: The difference TRAVIS: So that’s 21 SAM: With your rage? TRAVIS: Yeah MATT: So as you hack in a third time with the blade, making a smear of blood across the ground, the entangled vines that hold her there are soaked in crimson at this point. And she’s coughing and sputtering, you can see the open wounds in her chest, and her hand reaching out “Sylas.” And he’s going for her at that point That’s the end of your turn. She’s still alive TRAVIS: Yep MATT: Vex, you’re up ASHLEY: Good job TRAVIS: I thought she was undead, just figured MATT: No, she’s alive JOE: She’s a clone TRAVIS: Oh, really? MARISHA: Yeah, I was wondering about that TRAVIS: Sylas is undead MATT: Correct TRAVIS: The dragon’s undead JOE: No, because I’ve faced her before TRAVIS: Are the gloomstalkers undead? MATT: No TRAVIS: Not undead? LAURA: I bet she’s a fucking clone ASHLEY: What does that mean? LAURA: She made a clone of herself MATT: That ends your turn. Vex LAURA: Okay, so if I attack her, it’s at disadvantage? Or with– MATT: With a ranged attack? Yes, because she is– well, she’s restrained, which gives her advantage, so technically, it would be just a regular attack roll LAURA: Well then I’m going to attack her. She’s already restrained. Fuck it, I’m going to attack her with a blazing bowstring MATT: Go for it MARISHA: Kill her, kill her LAURA: Yes. 17 plus 14, with sharpshooter MATT: Yeah, that hits
LAURA: Minus five. Oh god, 15 plus two is 17, 25, 30, plus the blazing bowstring, 37. That’s everything, right? TALIESIN: Did you do your plus ten for the Sharpshooter? LAURA: 47 for Sharpshooter! TRAVIS: Hunter’s Mark? LAURA: 47, I didn’t Hunter’s Mark it MATT: 47 points of damage with the Sharpshooter How do you want to do this? (cheering) MARISHA: Get it girl! Get it girl! MATT: She was reaching out for that Dimension Door LAURA: Oh fuck! MATT: You see her hand reaching out, and you see her fingers tracing the incantation in the air as Sylas’ hand reaches outstretched for hers LAURA: I point my finger down at her as I’m about to shoot the arrow. As it shoots, I keep pointing at her like: How’s it feel, bitch? How’s it feel? MATT: As she reaches out, her eyes are locked with Sylas. She’s not even paying attention to Grog at this point, all she’s focused on is escape. And Grog as you look down at her and Sylas is looking into her face reaching out, the arrow just (impact) through the jaw and out the side of her cheek there. (breath catches) and her eyes go cold. The spell incantation fades and the hand just twitches and falls to the ground still MARISHIA: That was so dope! ASHLEY: Yes! MATT: As that happens, Sylas, his hand still reached out goes (yelling) “No!” LAURA: Oh I feel so bad for him TRAVIS: No you don’t LAURA: I do have another attack! MATT: He turns around to look at you, “Vengeance, I suppose, is mine this time.” LAURA: And I attack him MATT: This is a unique reversal of last time LAURA: With blazing bowstring MATT: Okay LAURA: Sharpshooter. So 28 minus five hits? MATT: 28 minus five, yeah, that hits. That is the end of Delilah Briarwood TRAVIS: Like done? MATT: Clones take a while LAURA: 33 damage to him. Seven of which is fire damage MATT: Gotcha. Is that the end of your turn? TRAVIS: Were her hands her own hands? MATT: They seemed to be LAURA: I’m going to run down the stairs to the lower level. Yeah, I’m in there MATT: Okay. All right, first things first. As soon as Delilah’s body goes lifeless, Keyleth, you feel this sudden shift beneath your feet, as the bone structure that maintains the body of the skeletal dragon collapses entirely (cheering) LAURA: Two with one! TALIESIN: I was going to feel really guilty about killing that thing MATT: You suffer 11 points of bludgeoning damage MARISHA: That’s fine MATT: Percy, you’re up TALIESIN: I want to try and come around here if possible MATT: With a speed of 30 you can do that, yeah TALIESIN: Just here SAM: Matt, don’t forget those two guys MATT: They just got there last turn LAURA: Delilah’s dead! MATT: Percy, what are you doing? TALIESIN: First thing I’m doing is I’m taking a grit shot at Sylas with Animus. And I’m doing a headshot just to make his life a little more complicated LIAM: Do you get them at Reproductions, too? TALIESIN: I do, I’m taking very nice head shots Actually, I go to Prints Charming MARISHIA: Do you really? SAM: That is not a place TALIESIN: That’s a real place. It’s on Ventura MATT: Percy! Roll your attack! TALIESIN: Sorry! The most LA moment in our game ever! Just now! LIAM: I don’t know about that TALIESIN: Yeah, no, maybe not. Yep, that’ll do, that’s a 26 to hit? MATT: That’ll hit! TALIESIN: And he has to make a constitution saving throw
MATT: Okay, He’s going to use legendary resistance to succeed TALIESIN: That’s fine TRAVIS: His first one? MATT: His first one TALIESIN: He still takes 16 points of damage and two points of psychic damage MATT: All righty, 18, got it TALIESIN: And I’m going to take another headshot, because that’s funny. And that’s 31 to hit MATT: All right, go ahead and roll damage TALIESIN: That’s 12 points of damage and one psychic damage. And does he make his constitution saving throw? MATT: He does actually, what’s the DC on it? TALIESIN: The DC is 20 MATT: He rolled 20 exactly TALIESIN: Fine. I’m going to take another headshot. Burning my grit SAM: Pew pew! TALIESIN: I should have gone for a Sharpshooter That’s 34 to hit, Jesus Christ MATT: That hits TALIESIN: Another constitution saving throw MATT: That is a 20 again! TALIESIN: God, motherfucker! MATT: 16 plus four both times TALIESIN: That’s 15 points of damage plus four psychic. So 19 total MATT: As he’s there, his arm out, and he’s seething with rage, his eyes burning bright red, like the same shade as Grog’s, which is disconcerting. Each bullet hits him and he doesn’t react. (bullets hitting) He’s just looking down at her and back up at Vex and down at her. Is that your turn? TALIESIN: No, I don’t like the way he’s doing that, I’m burning an action surge. I’m going to use some Sharpshooter. I’m going to burn a bonus and reload my gun. Let’s just take three Sharpshooter shots, see what happens MARISHIA: That one’s cocked, I think MATT: No, they’re there TALIESIN: I should not have rolled all three at once MATT: Oh well TALIESIN: The way they landed, it would have been the third one anyway. Two shots, that’s 15 to hit? No MATT: 15 misses. He puts a hand up without even watching and deflects the bullet from the air LAURA: He deflects the bullet?! TALIESIN: 20 to hit MATT: 20 to hit? He’s going to use his reaction to use parry and the second bullet, with the other hand he shoots it off to the side. Not even looking at you just staring at Vex still LAURA: He’s looking at me? Oh no TALIESIN: And the third shots jams at a two LAURA: No I ran away! He can’t see me! I’m downstairs MATT: Glaring at the space you were when you ran TRAVIS: Yeah, through all material TALIESIN: Actually I have a resistance now to psychic damage, so I take 1d6 psychic damage for my gun, not two, correct? MATT: Okay, yes you do TALIESIN: I take my four points and I am happy for them MATT: That ends your turn! TALIESIN: That ends my turn MATT: Arkhan SAM: Come on, Arkhan JOE: I command the gloomstalker to shriek. I just read this LAURA: What does it do when he shrieks? JOE: Within 60 feet, the gloomstalker emits a terrible, shattering shriek that impacts all hostile creatures. Each must make a DC 16 constitution save or become stunned until the end of their next turn MARISHA: Hell yeah JOE: And it’s the two up there, right? MATT: Technically they are, yeah. That’s what they were going to do next turn. So that’s a two on the one gloomstalker. That is a 14, they both fail Both of the other gloomstalkers, all of a sudden (croaking) their heads begin writhing around. They are stunned until their next turn. And Sylas is going to use his second legendary resistance of the day MARISHIA: We can burn him out. Burn him out JOE: And now I’m unimpeded, direct. All the way to him MATT: Correct LAURA: Destroy him! MATT: Fly this over to him TALIESIN: High-five Keyleth on the way in MATT: Cool! And? JOE: Okay and I’m going to do reckless on this ASHLEY: Yeah you are TRAVIS: Atta boy! LAURA: I like the magical flourish of the die JOE: It’s like some David Copperfield MATT: Exactly MARISHIA: Just salt bae your dice JOE: Does 32 hit? MATT: 32 does hit JOE: Okay great. Is this guy undead? MATT: Yes he is. He is a vampire
JOE: Out of curiosity, the bones of Delilah. She deflated like a bag? MATT: She’s dead. The skeleton fell into piles of bones SAM: She’s okay MATT: She’s not okay JOE: She’s not a zombie MATT: She’s a slashed-up human. Her whole torso is a mess. She has an arrow through her jaw and cheek LAURA: Out her eyeball JOE: Great. Well, then I would like to do a 2nd-level Divine Smite, which is going to be 6d8 TRAVIS: 6d8? Holy shit JOE: I rolled badly. That’s a 28 TRAVIS: (laughing) That’s bad? Oh man MATT: 28 points. All right, so as you rush forward with your axe, you swing down into Sylas, who gets slammed in the side of the shoulder, and as the spark of the Divine Smite energy slams into his side, you can see him: he’s starting to feel the pinch, all of you surrounding him JOE: That’s a cock MATT: Roll again. It’s a dice, actually JOE: That’s not great. That’s 19 MATT: 19 does not hit, unfortunately JOE: I would like to frenzy MATT: Okay, so you’re rolling your third strike JOE: Frenzy, reckless MATT: Yeah JOE: That’s going to be a 27 MATT: 27 hits. Roll damage MARISHA: Kill him! JOE: I’ll go 2nd-level Divine Smite again TRAVIS: Come on, now! JOE: My friend John bought me some smite dice Let’s go. Oh man, that’s not a lot. That’s rough, isn’t it? MARISHA: Goddamn it, John JOE: That’s a 29, which was a terrible roll MATT: First attack slams into it and bursts Second one, you swing and Sylas’ form turns to shadow temporarily and dissipates around the blade and returns. The third hit does strike true in the back of the head. (yelps) He yelps out in pain as the blast bursts upward. You can see the flesh burning from the impact of the radiant damage That end your turn? JOE: I believe it will do so, yes MATT: That brings us to Sylas’ turn. Sylas does not regenerate because the radiant damage kept it at bay TRAVIS: I did not know that JOE: It’s why I did divine MATT: Radiant damage prevented his regeneration Looking at his current circumstance, he’s going to– MARISHA: No! MATT: You watch as he glances around and his body (whoosh) into a bat SAM: Scanlan Two’s going to cast Counterspell MATT: It’s not a spell (groaning) MATT: Scanlan Two goes to counter it, but there’s no spell to counter MARISHA: Vampire bullshit! MATT: Turns into a bat (fluttering) MARISHA: I have a reaction! Can Keyleth the ellie try to grab it? MATT: You don’t get to grab, you get an attack of opportunity MARISHA: Can I? MATT: You get an attack of opportunity. You get an attack of opportunity, and Grog gets an attack of opportunity LAURA: And Bigby’s Hand MATT: Bigby’s Hand does not get reactions JOE: Does They get a attack of opportunity? MATT: Yeah, one attack SAM: Against a bat TALIESIN: Which means if you hit him enough, he drops back to human MATT: That’s not how a vampire bat form works It’s not a Polymorph. He has the same hit points in the bat form as he does in his normal form TRAVIS: What if I made this a reckless tripping attack? LAURA: Does that work on a bat? Can you trip a bat? TRAVIS: I don’t know. I don’t know if it would ground him for one second or not. I don’t know That’s why I’m asking the DM JOE: Who goes first out of all these attacks of opportunity? MATT: You go first JOE: Okay, then I would like to attempt to snatch the bat with gloomstalker MARISHA: Yes! Come on, yes! JOE: Has a snatch MATT: Okay MARISHA: Snatch that bat! ASHLEY: Get that snatch MATT: Roll an attack JOE: That’s a 24 MATT: 24 hits JOE: Snatched! SAM: What does that mean, snatched? JOE: The target is grappled. The target is considered restrained. I can also fly with my grappled target at half of my speed. It’s 2d6 plus six piercing damage. Right? SAM: He doesn’t like this MATT: Because the snatch is a special attack, essentially, as a reaction, because a reaction gives you a melee attack; it’s not an actual attack towards him– let me double-check here for you guys real fast
JOE: Was that me trying to sneak one by? SAM: No. No, it doesn’t say that it’s special. Why don’t you plan a backup, just in case? MATT: Just double checking here. Okay LIAM: How are you doing there, M? MARISHA: I’m nervous TALIESIN: It’s our fidget spinner LAURA: I need a food for my nervousness TALIESIN: I will let you know if it snaps while it’s in your teeth it hurts a lot. I know that from experience MARISHA: Yeah, this is like what Dr. Seuss warns us about as kids LAURA: You could break your tooth SAM: Guys, what are those shirts? Can you hold up that shirt again? Oh, there it is TALIESIN: This is the face Matt’s not making right now JOE: After, if you want to enter the raffle, I’m not sure how this works, but I brought this shirt We’re going to rub it all over Travis at break and then the winner is going to get this shirt. These only come in extra large MATT: I will say because I don’t allow monsters to use special attacks as reactions and haven’t used them the entire game against you guys, because that would’ve been much more dangerous, I won’t allow it for this circumstance, but it does still do the damage on the regular attack JOE: Fine. Okay, great, then I’m going to bite this right in the fucking nose MATT: It’ll still hit. Go ahead and roll damage ASHLEY: It can also be a Halloween costume SAM: Ooh! MARISHA: Oh my goodness! Matthew Mercer?! MATT: This got really weird suddenly TALIESIN: We’re going to show up to the next game, all wearing them like a terrible Council of Evil MARISHA: (laughter) Just the eyes cut out JOE: Not bad. Do you want me to break it down, piercing and necrotic? MATT: No, that’s fine JOE: Okay, 29 points MATT: Actually, no, I do need two of those JOE: Okay, then we’re going to have 19 piercing and eight necrotic MATT: Okay. Cool JOE: 19 and eight, 27 MATT: Make your attack of opportunity, your attack of opportunity and your attack of opportunity TRAVIS: I’m going to do reckless Trip attack MARISHA: Don’t. Fuck. Me. Gil! It’s fine. It kind of fucked me. 12 MATT: No. (ricochet noise) Off his armor JOE: 30 MATT: That hits, roll damage TRAVIS: 34 MATT: Hits, roll damage TRAVIS: He’s undead, right? MATT: Yes JOE: You first, Grog TRAVIS: Oh, no, please JOE: No, no, no, you TRAVIS: No, you were up first, I insist. Arkhan, please JOE: Yeah, but you did that dynamic jump, it was really cool MARISHA: Jocks were not this polite in the locker room SAM: They were to each other TRAVIS: Yeah, 17 and then I roll a d8 or I add a d8 MATT: d8 additional damage, yep TRAVIS: It’s my first one I’ve ever rolled. Five Shit, what did I say? MATT: 17 TRAVIS Thank you. 22 MATT: All right, 22 damage TRAVIS: It’s a trip attack MATT: What does it say it does? I’ll pull it up TRAVIS: Oh, I’ll pull it up. I’ve got it right here MATT: Here we go. Okay, a strength saving throw That’s a natural one, so he’s going to use his last legendary resistance to resist it. He’s out of legendary resistances now. All right, and damage on that one? JOE: Just pumped a 1st-level Divine Smite, and that’s going to be 21 plus three is 24, 24– TRAVIS: Does his hand turn into a bat with him? Or does that fall– MATT: All of his equipment goes into his form JOE: That’s going to be 40 points of damage MATT: As you all slam into the side of this bat form it shrieks out and then just (flapping) it takes off and is going to use its action to go ahead and go into a dash and continue to fly away TALIESIN: I feel like I would be able to get an attack somewhere in here considering my range if I pulled out my big gun MATT: Oh yeah. No, we’re coming back to that. He is at that full speed and that form– TRAVIS: Plus we’re still in initiative order LIAM: Our reactions come from melee range MATT: Okay. So that ends Sylas’ turn. Pike, you’re up ASHLEY: How far away is he? MATT: He would be about– Let’s say at that flying speed of the bat, which I have to look up now, because that’s a thing TALIESIN: How could you not be prepared for– MATT: I know. What is this bullshit, Matt? Jesus Christ! The bat’s flying speed is 30 feet. So he’s 60 feet away from you guys at an angle that way LAURA: Like here? MATT: Yeah. 60 feet up there. All right. Pike, what are you doing?
ASHLEY: Okay. I’m going to– MARISHA: I love your commitment to the tickle ASHLEY: I’m trying to think of what I should do Okay, I’m going to try to Guiding Bolt it MATT: Okay LAURA: Guiding Bolt, up the butt! You want to move forward so you can hit him? ASHLEY: Yeah MATT: Guiding Bolt, I believe you have to roll your attack on that one? Yeah, make a ranged spell attack ASHLEY: 18 MATT: 18 does not hit ASHLEY: I’m going to use Guided Strike MATT: Okay ASHLEY: Which adds plus ten, so 28 MATT: You can use it on yourself, right? ASHLEY: Yeah. Guided Strike is for myself, War God’s Blessing is somebody else MATT: That’s what it is. Yeah. Go for it. That hits, go ahead and roll damage ASHLEY: I’m going to do it at 3rd level, so that’s four, 6d6 LAURA: 6d6? MATT: 6d6 radiant damage LAURA: All radiant! That is a really good roll TALIESIN: That looks solid from here SAM: Ashley Johnson. Clutch. Bicoastal Roll MATT: Bicoastal Roll? ASHLEY: Okay, 23 MATT: 23. (impact) The bat now is shining; the next attack against it has advantage. End of your turn? ASHLEY: Let me see. My bonus actions. Ugh, I don’t want to use that in case. Okay, that’s it MATT: All right. End of your turn, going to use its Legendary Action to move at speed; the bat is now 90 feet away. That ends your turn, that brings us to Scanlan. Oh, the gloomstalkers, actually, which are no longer stunned. But that’s the end of their turn. End of the gloomstalkers’ turn, it’s going to use another Legendary Action to move another 30, so it’s 120 feet away. Scanlan, you’re up LAURA: He’s really far away from us now MATT: He’s just full sprint LIAM: You said 120 feet away? MATT: 120 feet, yeah LAURA: Can you do anything at 120 feet, Scanlan? SAM: I can do something. I can do one thing MARISHA: If you guys let me go right now I can try– You can do something? SAM: Scanlan One will just hold his turn until those gloomstalkers are in range or until they move, and then he’ll cast, I don’t know, frigging Wand of Magic Missiles, I don’t know MATT: Sure. All right, end of Scanlan’s turn, will use third and final Legendary Action, is now 150 feet away MARISHA: No! Let me go first! MATT: We’re now at Vax’s turn LAURA: Yeah, you can’t switch your initiative MARISHA: You can if other people hold. And you describe– MATT: They can hold their action, but then at the end of their turn, he still gets to do movement LIAM: All right, I’m going to use my movement and dash, so five, ten, 15… 50, 55, 60, and I’m going to paladin attack the gloomstalker up there MATT: Okay LIAM: First one is great, that is a 33. And the second one is also pretty good, 25. Do those both hit? MATT: They both have an AC of 15 LIAM: Okay, shit. Should’ve called Sharpshooter All right, so the first one is one, plus eight is nine– TRAVIS: Can he use a legendary resistance on a grapple? MATT: No, because a grapple check is a versus LIAM: Seven, so 11 and seven. Just 11 and seven on that Gloomstalker MATT: Got it. Ends your turn, Keyleth, you’re up MARISHA: How far away is he? MATT: 150 feet. from where he was MARISHA: I’m going to drop my form, take my action to cast Earthbind on him, it’s a 300-foot range spell LAURA: Oh my God. Please, please, please. He’s used up his legendary resistances, right? MARISHA: He did MATT: What’s the save he has to make? MARISHA: Strength versus my spell save TALIESIN: Do you have something because of your hit? MATT: That is 22. 17 plus five MARISHA: 22?! MATT: 17 plus five MARISHA: You can’t do anything? TALIESIN: The last time you hit him, does that mean– LAURA: Advantage! MATT: It’s a saving throw, it’s not an attack Yeah, the Earthbind does not take effect on him unfortunately– MARISHA: Can I do it again immediately? Can I try again? MATT: No, it’s an action to cast the spell MARISHA: Yeah MATT: Sorry MARISHA: I know! Can I wait and– MATT: Okay, Scanlan Two? Anything?
SAM: He’s 150 feet away? MARISHA: He rolled so fucking high! LAURA: Can you run 30 feet and then do something? MATT: He can run 25 feet SAM: I can run 25 feet and then reach 120 feet MATT: Yeah, you’re just under– SAM: I’m five feet shy JOE: Wait. I can get you on the back of this thing and fly it up there LIAM: Yeah, but we can’t get out of range of the ring unless we want to– LAURA: I mean, as soon as Sylas isn’t there, he’s going to know we’re here JOE: So we have to stay within 60 feet. Of each other LAURA: Or we can all just run MARISHA: If you all hold, I can try again TALIESIN: No, because he’s going to keep running LAURA: If we hold, he just keeps moving– MARISHA: Yeah, but it’s a 300-foot range spell, and he’s only 150 feet away. I don’t think he can dash 150 feet SAM: He already did 150 getting to your turn so he’ll be able to do another 150– MARISHA: But it’s a 300-foot range spell LIAM: He’d still be in range– TALIESIN: We don’t have to hold our turns, we’ll just get back to you MARISHA: Right. That’s what I’m saying TALIESIN: Oh yeah, no, we’re fine. I mean, that’ll happen eventually. If it’s going to get there LAURA: Whose turn is it? SAM: It’s Scanlan Two’s turn. He’s going to bonus action Bigby’s Hand, grapple one of the gloomstalkers MATT: Okay SAM: The one we’ve been working on MATT: All righty. Bigby’s Hand punches– SAM: Not punches, grapple MATT: Okay. We’ll say for the purposes of this, they’re– SAM: They’re easily killed MATT: They’re pretty easily killed given the circumstances you guys have, the chase now– SAM: Well, do you want to kill them, or save them for riding on? JOE: Bah! I think I’m– (laughter) JOE: 40 minus three is 37, This one’s got 37 hit points of damage LAURA: Just try to get Sylas JOE: Do what you feel, Scanlan SAM: Well, I’ll just hold him for you JOE: Oh, thanks. I appreciate that– MATT: Let’s say, Grog, you go up there and start Anything you want to do– TRAVIS: I want to see what the inside of them looks like MATT: Okay. For the purposes of expediency in this, so we don’t spend time just trudging through these things, you guys just hacking at these gloomstalkers SAM: One we’re saving for him MATT: Okay, I will say, to note, that the Control feature generally is a once-a-day type thing– SAM: Ooh. Then never mind, we kill it MATT: Not like it can constantly regenerate to the next thing JOE: Hmm. Let me read my description that you sent me. All right. No, okay. I’m calling Mike Mearls! MARISHA: We get back around everybody! Is he still fucking here?! MATT: We get to Sylas’ turn. Sylas dashes twice– TALIESIN: Wait, is it Sylas’ turn or my turn? MATT: Sorry, it’s your turn then Sylas’, so go ahead TALIESIN: My turn first. I’m going to take my advantage shot, because I have advantage because of– MATT: With which gun? TALIESIN: With Bad News MATT: Okay LAURA: Wait, why didn’t I get to go? MATT: Oh sorry, you’re first. Go for it LAURA: Can I run out the door and hop on my broom and fly as far as I can– TALIESIN: No, no, no, no! JOE: 60! TALIESIN: Ring! LAURA: Yeah, but I can only get 50 feet away from you guys. If I come here– MATT: As soon as you go around that side, you’re starting to get close. Up to you. You have Scanlan all the way over there. You barely have Scanlan in your– LAURA: So I can’t leave. So I’m at the bottom of the stairs. If I run up the stairs and broom it from here, how far would I get? MATT: Ten feet out the window LAURA: Ten feet out the window and he’s 150 and I’m– my shot is what, but with Sharpshooter– no, that’s different LIAM: Doesn’t affect range, it just affects your chances LAURA: Shit! Wait, let me look at Fenthras. I’m just hoping there’s something that says it’s 300 feet! MATT: Fenthras does not change your range LAURA: (nervous laughter) Okay then, it’s only 120-foot range, right? With a longbow? MATT: Well, the way longbows work is you have an inner range and an outer range, so if he’s beyond– TALIESIN: But if you’re Sharpshooter the outer range is the inner range LAURA: Oh, yeah! MATT: Yeah, your max is 600 LAURA: My max is 600 fucking feet? MATT: Yep TALIESIN: Oh, yeah, so you just walk up and take a shot LAURA: Okay then, I’m going to walk up to the window and I’m going to try to cast Bramble Shot on him TALIESIN: With advantage! LAURA: With advantage? SAM: It’s an attack ASHLEY: Because of– MATT: Guiding Bolt. Go for it TALIESIN: Much better! JOE: Holy freaking half-elf! LAURA: 20 MATT: 20 just hits (cheering) MARISHA: Get him down! LAURA: Oh my God. Okay, so 12, that’s 18 plus 4d8 LIAM: Sharpshooter doesn’t double the distance? MATT: No, but you have the two different ranges Because your range is technically 30 to 60, but you can go the full 60 without taking disadvantage after 30 feet LIAM: So it’s at disadvantage normally?
MATT: No disadvantage as a Sharpshooter. It’s a crazy feat LAURA: 43 MATT: 43 points of damage LAURA: And he has to make a strength save of DC 17 or be restrained MATT: That is a nine plus five, that is a 14 (cheering) MATT: As the arrow hits the bat, you watch as the arrow bursts into a sudden swarming of bramble vines. They wrap around him and the bat (small impact) LAURA: And does he take bludgeoning damage from hitting the ground? MATT: He does take a little bit. He’s about 80 feet up from there, because he’s going at an angle, so he takes 8d6 bludgeoning damage SAM: Oh my God! That was the most sniper thing you’ve ever done! LAURA: That was pretty awesome! MATT: And with that, you watch as the bat form (poof) dissipates. The brambles fall weak and open SAM: Is he there? MATT: Make a perception check LAURA: Can I see him? MATT: Make a perception check SAM: No bueno LIAM: I got 26 for Vax MATT: You see a misty cloud in the space where Sylas was LAURA: 34. Misty cloud! How did we fight him before? Sunlight destroyed him before? SAM: Radiant something, right? LAURA: Sunbeam destroyed him before TRAVIS: When he was in the gaseous form LAURA: Now he’s in the gaseous form. Okay, so I rolled a 34 TALIESIN: I rolled huge. 28 MATT: 28? To what? TALIESIN: Perception MATT: Yeah, you see the mist TALIESIN: How far away is he? LAURA: He’s 150 feet away LIAM: He didn’t get a chance to go LAURA: He’s 150 feet away from us MATT: Yeah LAURA: So as a group we can all try to move forward, but as we get closer to him– TALIESIN: You’ve got what it takes. What’s the distance on that thing? LAURA: What’s the Daylight casting distance? Can you run forward and get close enough? MARISHA: You guys aren’t going to want to hear this, I can run forward and Sunburst him at 150 feet away but it’s going to burn my 8th-level spell SAM: Don’t do that MARISHA: I have Sunbeam, which is a 6th-level spell at 60-foot away. No, I dropped my form MATT: Yep TALIESIN: What if you got on a mount? SAM: Just to get there as fast as you can JOE: But we can’t get outside of the 60-foot bubble TALIESIN: We can all move together and he will not be able to move at high speed as a mist LAURA: Hopefully MARISHA: Can I scoop up Vex and dash 60 feet ahead and Sunbeam him for another 60 feet? MATT: Dash as your action TALIESIN: And we have to stay together LAURA: We have to stay together JOE: Well, you’re in the gray. No. Where are you? MARISHA: I’m green LAURA: I’m technically right here, right now. I’m on the second level. Next to Pike JOE: And Bigby’s is– SAM: Is it your turn Keyleth? MARISHA: Yeah, whose turn is it? MATT: It’s finishing Vex’s LAURA: No, it’s Percy’s turn MATT: Okay, so Percy. Your turn LAURA: You could technically try to sh– Oh yeah, mist form (laughter) JOE: Was that a Jenga? TALIESIN: Wait. I have a weird thing I’m going to try and do– No, the thing I need to do, I need to get within 30 feet LAURA: Well, you can get within 60 feet of me so just move toward– TALIESIN: I’m going to move to the edge of where I’m capable of moving right now at my speed. I’m going to signal everybody and say move as a group So we’re going to try to sync our movements MATT: All right. We’ll say for the purposes of this, the mist travels and vanishes from sight by the time you are able to catch up to it to get it to a place where you can destroy it. Delilah Briarwood has been destroyed, seemingly for the last time. Sylas has been driven to wherever he needs to recover LAURA: Does it take him a long time? SAM: Vecna gives up JOE: Can I say one thing right now? MATT: Yes JOE: As we were moving in the bubble, I cast Animate Dead on Delilah and I raise her TALIESIN: You’re doing what?
SAM: We’re fighting her again! MATT: As you look out, you can see the mist, and the mist vanishes, and you can see now, looking up, dozens and dozens of gloomstalkers have all turned to see this out-in-the-open action that’s now taking place in the space around you. You are all out, not being stealthy, firing and shooting out into the air, and you see now, clusters of these things heading in your direction. As you turn and look to the side, you watch as Delilah’s body gets up from the ground JOE: Rise, and kneel before your master! MATT: As the shambling corpse of Delilah falls to her knees before Arkhan– JOE: Oathbreaker, baby! MATT: As the realization begins of what is coming at you. Two you could handle, maybe. There’s a lot in your direction. You have revealed your position, the wall was already destroyed and everything is swarming in your direction. As you all begin to turn around, you hear this deafening roar from the sky above you. You glance up to see a flash of brass light as Devo’ssa comes swooping into the barrier. Behind, a hundred or more Wyvern Riders, risen from Vasselheim to join the rest of the brigade come swarming in and collide with the gloomstalkers. You now see a frantic dog-fight cluster as hundreds of one and hundreds of the other begin slamming into each other, tearing each other apart. You see blades swing, you see arrows going flying and Devo’ssa begins to do sweeping rounds, back and forth across the sky. You realise if there is a moment to move with the distraction, it’s now JOE: I load Delilah on the back TALIESIN: I grab her wand MARISHA: And her holy symbol that fell to the ground LAURA: Whatever that sparking thing was MATT: The glowing sparkle light in it is inert now MARISHA: Is what? Inert? TALIESIN: It was the controller. So we have it LAURA: We book it towards the tower. Right? MATT: You guys begin bolting your way towards Entropis with its large funnel-like cloud encircling the top of its spire. And we’re going to take a break (cheering) TRAVIS: Y’all, we recruited dead Delilah! JOE: I want to find this dude! MARISHA: What a dick! MATT: We’re going to take a quick break, because we want to probably push to 11 tonight and then we’re going to leave, so make a quick restroom break, fast as we can, come back. See you guys here in just a minute LAURA: At the break we’re giving away– MARISHA: We’re giving away things TALIESIN: So many things! JOE: Jocks Machina! MARISHA: Yeah, actually, Max or Ryan, is there stipulations on the shirt? TALIESIN: Nope MARISHA: We’ll figure it out! JOE: Hey Travis, go put this on MATT: Okay guys, we’ll see you here in a few minutes TALIESIN: Take the wrapper off! That’s weird! [break]
MATT: Welcome back. A little longer than I anticipated, but that’s fine. We’re going to jump
in here, but before we do that, the winners for the Wyrmwood box, we have Zabando is the winner
For the Jocks Machina shirt, we have Alcyon299 Congratulations! You get to join the very
exclusive Jocks Machina club
TRAVIS: Testosterone poncho JOE: Only five of these. The other’s my trainer Ron, who plays another goliath, and my brother Nick, who plays an elf ranger who was incinerated by the fucking death knight! MATT: So. Bringing it back in. As you guys are charging your way toward Entropis, running through the streets, you do the best you can to dodge in and out of any sort of things that might catch your attention street-side. You see most of the undead and various cultists have been filtering down beneath the city a while back, and you’re not entirely certain where they are at the moment. The few dregs there are around there, you guys easily enough dodge around Pushing forward, you see the Spire of Entropis growing taller and taller, the closer and closer you get to it. As soon as you get to the base of the spire, you look up and you can see the broken seams of the once-toppled tower, now held together by the network of glowing, magical threads, like arcane veins, wrapping the tower and lending an unsettling, organic nature to its visage. The exterior still stands, windowless, like an obelisk of tyranny looming over the entirety of the city The apex, of course, is now obscured by shadow and cloud, this slow-spinning tornado of twilight darkness entwining the top, blocking visibility, and possibly entry, at the top. Numerous gloomstalkers encircle the higher level, not currently engaging in the main fray, which is chaos all around. You see more emerging from this cloud, almost seemingly creating them The large front doors of the tower appear somewhat ajar and open. There is one rot behemoth currently standing in front of this door. Vox Machina, what do you want to do? TRAVIS: I don’t want to overthink this, but I feel like the sword said that it wanted to cut the webs of Vecna. Can I just cut the tower down? LAURA: I don’t know if that’s– TRAVIS: I take your laugh as a sign of– SAM: I don’t know if you can cut the whole tower down. They’ll probably try to stop you. Don’t you think? ASHLEY: You could certainly try TRAVIS: I could, couldn’t I? ASHLEY: Yeah TRAVIS: Perhaps not LAURA: I feel like, do we see any other doors, like, secret doors, maybe? SAM: Do we see invisible doors? MATT: Perception, glancing around, you don’t see anything. It looks like this is the door, entrance, to it. You could make an investigation check, but you’d have to get up against the wall and carefully check it LAURA: Can I do that without letting the rot behemoth see me? MATT: You can certainly try TRAVIS: That’s a big fat no! MATT: You can certainly try. It’s not a no LIAM: But we’re directly in front of the door a ways back? How far back? MATT: You’re about 40 feet away from it, off to the side, glancing over where you can see the rot behemoth looming in the archway LAURA: We didn’t really think about how we were getting up the tower, did we? JOE: Here’s a possibility. I have a gloomstalker and I have Delilah. I put her on the back of this thing and fly it up there, maybe this thing moves out of the way LAURA: Maybe the rot behemoth moves? JOE: I’m just saying SAM: Can she talk? Can you make her talk? JOE: I don’t think I can puppet her. I can tell her to do commands LAURA: Can you tell her to talk? JOE: She’ll understand what I’m saying, but I don’t think she can– MATT: By the way, as you’ve made this journey forward and Delilah’s been shambling behind, you know, sitting behind you, this strange pain has been hitting you in the back of your shoulders You glance back and look at the corpse of Delilah behind you as a rapidly growing tree is protruding and growing out of the chest of the corpse, and is now setting weight off of the top of the gloomstalker as it’s trying to flutter up behind the party LAURA: Sorry, sorry, that’s a thing JOE: Can I Cleansing Touch and end one spell? MATT: It’s less of a spell effect and more of a divine seed that was placed inside her body when she was slain by the Vestige, Fenthras LAURA: I placed my seed inside of her TALIESIN: And it quickened MATT: Don’t make it weird LAURA: I make everything weird, Matt JOE: I’m not going to further question you about that SAM: You knocked her up
JOE: Yeah, okay, must be an elf thing. That’s interesting. Very interesting, okay, great SAM: Maybe they’ll think that it’s just a fashion thing, and they’ll let her through MATT: It’s still growing, and it’s now protruding about four feet from her chest. The body is now starting to get a little top-heavy LAURA: Just chop the tree down! It’s a thin tree MATT: Yeah, it’s not very thick. It’s maybe about– Okay, so you take a couple hacks at it and eventually you manage to cut away the tree. Now there’s a trunk that’s now stopped growing, about a foot out of Delilah’s chest, with roots that have taken root up into the shoulders and the chest LAURA: That’s sick. It’s like she’s got a built-in shield now TRAVIS: Can I take one of the fancy robes that remains in the Bag of Holding and drape it over the trunk coming out of her chest, so it’s a little more hidden? MATT: Sure LAURA: Now it looks like she’s pregnant! SAM: I need a house. Can I take her branches and make one? MATT: A house? SAM: Oh, it’s The Giving Tree (groaning) LAURA: That’s terrible (something clanks on the floor) LAURA: Oh! What was that? MATT: You have this rot behemoth at the entryway What are you guys doing? LIAM: Well, our options are somehow flying up or going in the front door LAURA: Do we fly up, or do we go inside and up the tower? I’m sure there’s no traps or horrible things on the inside of it MARISHA: Last time, Pike and I took it down with a couple of Earthquake spells TALIESIN: But that didn’t help nearly as much as we thought it would MARISHA: I mean, we didn’t have to go up the damn thing, so maybe check yourself before you say things SAM: Let’s just charge in. This is a fricking giant, right? We’ve killed giants TRAVIS: Behemoth. Is it dead? Undead? MATT: The rot behemoth? It’s undead JOE: It’s undead? How big is a rot behemoth? MATT: The rot behemoth is about 12 feet tall or so. Just a mass of stitched-together undead flesh JOE: Medium, or large? MATT: Large TALIESIN: I’ve got an idea. Can I borrow some of that infinite rope? LAURA: Of course TALIESIN: All right. I’m taking the infinite rope, and I’m tying it around my little gem that I have LAURA: The little blue gem? TALIESIN: My little glowing gem MARISHA: Are you going to do that $20 bill trick in New York City, thing? TALIESIN: More or less. Are we all agreed? LAURA: I love it, I love it! TRAVIS: If it doesn’t work, we kill it LAURA: Yeah, we’ll drag it out of the doorway so we can kill it! TALIESIN: Well, I’m going to make it move away, and then once we’re in I’m going to yank– LIAM: I used to do this with string and a G.I. Joe for my cat when I was a kid. She loved it. I’m sure the rot behemoth will too MATT: Okay, so. You take the pulse stone, you tie it around– TALIESIN: I tie it around in a monkey fist knot. I toss it about 20 feet away. I’m going to give it a throw. I’m going to throw it about 20 feet away from the– We’re all in agreement of this plan? SAM: This is the best plan LIAM: Wait, one second. Do we want to lure it into a house and all of us be waiting to gank the shit out of it? TALIESIN: Well, technically, wait, hold on MATT: You see a flash and a flare in the sky above you. You see a cluster of gloomstalkers immolated by a burst of flame breath from Devo’ssa, who’s now up in the stratosphere. At this same time, you see about a dozen or so wyvern riders go riding into this slow, spinning storm and get disintegrated into pieces TALIESIN: I’m actually going to throw the gem, then, past the stone giant, into the room. Just a little bit so that anything in the room– MATT: Make a strength check for me. That’s a bit of a lob TALIESIN: Okay. Nine? MATT: It makes it about the 20 feet you intended to. (clattering) LAURA: Pull it back and we’ll have one of the– I mean, not that you’re not strong and very– MATT: So what was the range on this Pulse Stone? TALIESIN: 30 feet MATT: Okay, it is within range to affect the rot behemoth TALIESIN: Okay. I have to roll, though. I have to do a roll to see if it survived the throw MATT: That’s true, yeah TALIESIN: Yeah. It’s fine MATT: Tink, tink! It’s a will save for the rot behemoth TALIESIN: DC 15 MATT: Wisdom? That’s a two. No. You guys watch as the rot behemoth, the stone, (clattering), its metal-armored face and glowing coal eyes turn (heavy footsteps) and walks over to the gem and stares at it TALIESIN: Let’s all go in, shall we? And I’m going to walk around it and stealth in LAURA: Pass Without a Trace is still fucking up, if it’s been less than an hour MATT: Make a concentration check for me, real fast. Make a constitution saving throw LIAM: We just watched the wyverns get obliterated trying to fly into the swirl at the top LAURA: I got 18 MATT: Okay, you maintain the concentration Referring to the blast from the skeletal dragon, earlier on. All right. So. Did you guys all roll stealth?
SAM: Stealth? Oh shit LAURA: Plus ten! TALIESIN: Natural 20 MARISHA: Wait, stealth? SAM: I rolled a two and a two, so that’s 15 and 15 JOE: How do I do this on this gloomstalker, with the zombie? How does this work? MATT: Zombie’s not stealthed, but it is undead Gloomstalker, it’s hard to be stealthed, that gloomstalker, right now SAM: We’re going inside, we don’t need it anymore! JOE: Want me to leave it? SAM: I mean, what are you going to do with a flying thing in a narrow stairway? We’ve seen inside, we scryed inside. It’s a very narrow stairway going up LAURA: Can you have him climb up the side of the tower and meet you up top? SAM: Oh yeah, meet us up top? (under his breath) He ain’t going to survive that LAURA: Well, we can try it though TRAVIS: He might JOE: Yeah, I think that would work MATT: Okay, you can do that JOE: I hate it when you do that! LIAM: I mean, I love it, but I hate it TALIESIN: Also, double checking– grit is a reset after combat, not a reset after a short rest? MATT: No, it’s a short rest TALIESIN: Short rest? Okay, just checking JOE: I have the wreath back on my neck, correct? Because that’s how it works, I put it back on my neck once we’re attuned? MATT: Yeah, you put it back on your neck once you’ve– correct JOE: Okay. They, meet us at the top! MATT: Okay, as you step off and look into its eyes, your eyes flare the bright yellow color and the gloomstalker nods, takes a step back, and then leaps onto the side of the tower, its claws gripping in. As it bats its wings, it takes off and starts heading upward JOE: Circle at the top and wait for my command! MATT: It seems to acknowledge your command JOE: All right, now at disadvantage, rolling in heavy plate TRAVIS: You got it JOE: Do I have a plus ten? Sweet. Yeah, I got this. All right. Nine, 27 MATT: Okay, so. 27. Two and two, 15, 15. Natural 20 MARISHA: 29 LIAM: Oh, it was a one, but it’s a 37 now LAURA: Because you rolled a luck? What? LIAM: No, Matt told me that, because of reliable talent, one means shit MATT: He always has a ten minimum LAURA: That’s fucking badass! 37 ASHLEY: 21 TRAVIS: 22 MATT: All right. So as you guys all dart in around this rot behemoth, who pays no mind to your presence, you dart into the partially ajar doorway into the base of Entropis, the tower itself. It’s dark inside. As soon as you all dart into the interior, the doors are still partially open and you can see the faint glow of the very low general light that encompasses the city of Thar Amphala The normal greenish-blue glow of the shield is offset a little bit by the natural light that’s coming through from the opening of the barrier that you guys have opened. However, the light still diminishes as you step into this large chamber. As soon as you enter the chamber, those of you with darkvision glance around and see, it’s a big thoroughfare. You see a large foyer-type chamber with pillars that go from bottom to maybe 25, 30 feet up, to a ceiling. Across the way, you can see two spiral staircases that curl upward and there, maybe, 30 or so humanoid figures that are in the center of this chamber SAM: What are they doing? MATT: Well, as soon as you guys step and turn around, they all turn and look at you and begin to– (sluggish footsteps) LAURA: We need that orb TALIESIN: Once they’re within range of us, I’m going to wait MATT: I mean, a lot of them are going to be right up on you, right now JOE: Can I sense what kind they are? Divine Sense, tell what type of fiend, celestial, or undead they are? MATT: They are undead. They appear to be mostly of the baseline skeletal or zombie variety. It’s a cluster of undead that are set here TALIESIN: Okay, I’m going to tug on the rope and pull it up and toss the gem right smack-dab in the center of us. Unless somebody else wants to throw it. Eh, it doesn’t matter. I just yanked it MATT: Okay, you yank it. Go ahead and make a roll See if it’s destroyed or not TALIESIN: Nope, it’s good MATT: All right. The stone (clattering) arcs in the center. The blue pulse-glow light billows out You see the various skeletons and zombies charge into the light. They stop and stare at it. Let’s see TALIESIN: DC 15 LIAM: 30 rolls SAM: Pike, can’t you kill masses of undead? MATT: Okay, so of the 30 or so, about 20 of them stop and stare at the glow while you hear a bounding, heavy footfall sound behind where you came from TALIESIN: He was not still within range? MATT: No, you pulled the stone from where you were, inside the chamber now, so he’s now rushing
in after where the stone went LIAM: This’ll still work. Spread, and let him run right into the range of it? LAURA: Oh, we can get out of the way and let him maybe run into the undead that are– LIAM: As soon as he enters he’s in range, isn’t he? MATT: Possibly. Up to you guys. But technically, undead are still rushing in toward you and they’re immediately scrambling, with their claws and teeth, out there. Let’s say, for the people at front here, it’s going to be probably the two of you who first made it in, so three attacks against each of you. That is an 18 against you, Vax LIAM: No MATT: That is a 20 against you LIAM: No MATT: No, that misses. Three against you. Natural 20. A 20 LAURA: No MATT: And a natural one. All right, so while they scramble at you and you push them back at bay, one of them does manage to get through. It’s going to be 12 points of slashing damage against you, Vex, as one of them swings at you with a rusty blade that carves past you LAURA: Okay MATT: All right. What are you guys doing? ASHLEY: How many of them? About 30? MATT: About 30 of them, yeah LIAM: Pickle, can you release a Sarenrae bomb? ASHLEY: Yeah, I’ll take out my Mace of Disruption I don’t want to use any more spells MATT: You have your Channel Divinity, your turn undead. Or destroy undead LAURA: Yeah, destroy undead ASHLEY: Do I want to wait? LAURA: I don’t know how many undead we’re going to face– LIAM: Vecna’s going to be too powerful for a destroy or turn undead. It’s for weak-ass shit like this LAURA: But he might have, you know, I don’t know what kind of army he’s going to have up top, so it’s up to you ASHLEY: Well, I have another one LAURA: So maybe do one of them? ASHLEY: So I can do it now, yeah MATT: Okay, so as you rush in toward where this Pulse Stone is, as the crowd of undead are gathered in, you hunker down, clutch your holy symbol, and release a wave of divine energy, the whispers and prayer of Sarenrae emanating from you like a caustic wave against undead energy. What’s the DC on that? ASHLEY: It’s not written down MATT: It’s your spell DC LAURA: Oh, 18 MATT: Okay, 18 SAM: Wisdom, intelligence, or charisma LIAM: Wisdom for clerics SAM: Has your wisdom gone up at all? LIAM: Eight, plus five, plus your proficiency bonus. 14, 20 LAURA: You’re at six proficiency bonus, now You’re not at– ASHLEY: I am? I didn’t know that LAURA: So your DC is 19. Sorry, Matt MATT: It’s okay. I lost count. Even with their saves, four undead survive. As the shock wave emanates out from you, you watch as about two dozen of these various skeletons and zombies, many of which are grasping at you, turn to ash. One of them, you see it reaching out toward you, you get a glimpse of it. You can see, this one’s a fresher corpse, one of the zombies. It has dirty blonde hair, a torn chin with stubble, and for a brief minute you can see– it has this gash in its stomach, a partially eaten arm. For a brief minute, as it reaches out for you before the wave hits, you’re like, “Aldor?” Turns to ash MARISHA: Aldor? MATT: A member of the Slayer’s Take. Once the prized love of– SAM: Felicia Day! (gasping) LAURA: No! MARISHA: No, Aldor! SAM: Oh, no! MATT: As the flash expands, you glance around and you see a withered gnome corpse has been reaching toward you. Mostly bald head in places. You recognize, this is one of your companions, Grubby, before the wave hits and he turns to ash SAM: You just killed two of our friends, Pike! LAURA: Don’t do that to her! ASHLEY: Fuck off, I didn’t know! MATT: All of these are long dead. As this burst of energy hits and all of a sudden dust and ash fill the chamber around you– LAURA: Did it do anything to the rot behemoth coming in? MATT: The rot behemoth behind– what is the DC on him? LIAM: Challenge rating of four or lower MATT: Yeah, it’s higher than a challenge rating four, so it doesn’t affect him at all. But the four of you, easy enough to cleave him down, but we’ll see if he’s even affected by the stone. So the last four that are there, as they charge into the stone, nope! None of them make their save, so the last four that are still there, all stop and stare and glare at this stone in the center of the chamber. The rot behemoth comes looming in (crashing) What’s the DC? TALIESIN: DC is 15 MATT: 14, does not make it. By one! LIAM: Don’t worry, Matt. Your luck is coming upstairs
MATT: That’s true, that’s true. So the rot behemoth (crashing) through the door and then stays there, staring at the stone, blocking the doorway and holding it in place. But now this chamber’s open LAURA: Should we kill this shit while we’re stunned? SAM: No, we should just run up! LAURA: How do we know we’re not going to run into a whole bunch more? TALIESIN: Which is why we’re going to keep the rope. We’re going to go all the way up the stairs, and when we’re ready, we’re going to tug like a motherfucker LAURA: Okay, and then all these things are going to chase after us? MATT: They’ll keep following you. Every time you pull the stone, they’re going to come toward you LAURA: So we might as well kill them now, while they’re stunned TALIESIN: All right, one at a time. Let’s kill one at a time SAM: The giant’s going to take more than one hit TALIESIN: Yeah, but we’re going to get him MATT: We’ll say, easy enough for you guys to coordinate. The skeletons are easy enough to destroy. The rot behemoth, all in one swoop, you guys can take down as one quick blast on it. One of the skeletons, you also recognize: a heavily charred zombie making a horrid sighing sound as it’s sitting there, staring at the stone. You see the remains of Vander JOE: Is he damaged? MATT: Burnt to a cinder. The last thing you saw was him being immolated and screaming JOE: I’d like to Channel Divinity and Control Undead MATT: Okay. And with that, before you destroy the zombie– JOE: It’s a wisdom save MATT: Wisdom save? Three. Nope. You’ve got two zombies. Delilah and now your previous ally, Vander. Turns from the stone. (wheezing) JOE: This is fucking dark TALIESIN: I’m really excited about the notion of a Delilah potted plant JOE: It’s my brother’s character from our home group! LIAM: You are now Michonne, from Walking Dead. You got two zombies TRAVIS: Bring them into the CRU, you got them! JOE: Zombie Vander, aw man. This is like, rattling whatever blackened heart my character has. Okay LIAM: All right, well, up we go, then, yeah? TALIESIN: Let’s do this LIAM: I’m going to look for traps, as we go MATT: All right, make an investigation check SAM: Everyone all healed up to full? LAURA and MARISHA: No SAM: Should we pause and heal, or–? LAURA: Pause for 30 minutes and heal? TRAVIS: Vasselheim was just out the window LIAM: Two miles away, ish MATT: What’d you roll? LIAM: 18 MATT: 18, okay SAM: If you take a potion, you’re full. Right? Don’t you have your thing going, or no, is that gone? TRAVIS: Beacon of Hope LAURA: Beacon of Hope just means it heals the max that a healing spell or a healing potion can do You don’t automatically go to full health TRAVIS: 2d8, 16 SAM: Oh, I didn’t know that MATT: How long does Beacon of Hope last? LIAM: One minute MATT: Beacon is gone LAURA: That’s okay. Do you have a healing spell for people? ASHLEY: I do TRAVIS: Are we doing a group thing right now? LIAM: Are we short resting or we doing little healies? LAURA: I don’t think we have 30 minutes MARISHA: We need a full 30 minutes to do a quick short rest? MATT: Technically it’s a full hour, by the rules I let it slide a little faster in times of intensity. I’d allow a 30-minute quick rest, but that’s still– TALIESIN: I would not say no to it, but I can live without it LAURA: I don’t know, I mean, they’re fighting at Vasselheim right now TRAVIS: Yeah, we’re at the gates MARISHA: I’m at 94 hit points, I’m down about 50 or so hit points LIAM: I’m telling you, though, it’s this or nothing. If we fall here, if we fail, then it’s fucked, so even if it destroys half the city, it’s better to have all of us at full fighting potential JOE: I would like to cast Death Ward on myself 4th-level spell slot MATT: Okay TRAVIS: All right, do it. Do the short rest. Just do it SAM: Wait, we’re doing a short rest? Wait, who needs it? TALIESIN: We honestly all do LAURA: We all need healing. I’m 40 points down MARISHA: I’m 50 points down, and I burned both of my shape change. Who else is down far? TRAVIS: A quarter, or half, of Vasselheim, is– SAM: Don’t you have a healing spell? ASHLEY: I do, but it depends on the roll SAM: No no, because it maximizes it LAURA: No, we don’t have it anymore ASHLEY: Yeah, so if I roll bad, or– LIAM: No, but we have hit dice. You don’t need the spells SAM: Bye, Vasselheim MATT: All right, so you guys are taking a short rest in the inside of Entropis? MARISHA: No, look, super short MATT: There is no super-short rest. It’s a short rest SAM: Seems terrible MATT: Vasselheim was in sight when you were outside MARISHA: I don’t know! What do you want? MATT: I’m just letting you know! SAM: We have potions! Can’t we drink potions? JOE: Listen, you’re not going to need the potions after today. I’m just saying
LAURA: Might as well take them TRAVIS: Don’t take your superior, though SAM: No, we have other ones, though LAURA: Can you try healing and see what it does? ASHLEY: Yeah, I’ll do Mass Cure Wounds on you guys LAURA: What does that do? MARISHA: I don’t know, but we also, we broke down the barrier, so Vasselheim can defend itself a little more TRAVIS: One-sixth of the pie MARISHA: I’m 50 points down and without my beast shape LAURA: You don’t have beast shape? MARISHA: I used it to go earth elemental, because I thought the Briarwood fight might be a little bit more beefy than it was. But I don’t necessarily need it TRAVIS: Vote as a group. Hand up if you want a short rest SAM: No TRAVIS: No hands? Just put your hand up if you want it TALIESIN: I will admit, it would do a lot for me TRAVIS: Keyleth, put your hand up LIAM: I’m going to put up because I think that these two need it TRAVIS: I’ll tie-break it LAURA: So short rest? Short rest. Okay SAM: Vasselheim MARISHA: To quote the leaders of Vasselheim, “They have defended themselves through many forms of battle.” JOE: That vampire’s going to be up there, full strength. He’s going to be back. He’s going to be back full strength LAURA: He might not be back full strength yet! JOE: He’ll be back something LAURA: He takes a while to rest up JOE: It’s 25 a minute, isn’t it? TRAVIS: It’s super fast MATT: He regenerates 25– Well, there’s a lot of things at work here. It depends. Roll a religion check TRAVIS: Natural one TALIESIN: I’ll try a religion check JOE: I’m a paladin with terrible religion skills Blind faith MATT: All right, but still roll a religion check Seeing as how undead is your domain LIAM: Just roll a natural 20, Joe JOE: I rolled a natural 18 MATT: Plus? JOE: Zero, for religion MATT: Okay, okay. You know this because of your experience with undead and amassing yourself a necromantic energy since breaking your oath long ago. When a vampire is reduced to zero hit points and goes into mist form, it has two hours to return to its resting place. When it reaches its resting place, it has to rest for one hour. Once it rests for the one hour, it goes back to one hit point and then it regenerates 25 hit points, or at least, Sylas, every single round LIAM: Roughly how much time has passed since we went from–? MATT: I’d say 30-ish minutes or so. 30 or 40, because you’ve been slowly stealthing your way through, being careful LIAM: Right right, but probably his box of dirt is not– MATT: So if you take a short rest, you’re probably going to look at a Sylas waiting for you somewhere up top LAURA: It’s going to take two hours to get up the tower? SAM: It’s a big tower. There’s lots of shit up there MATT: No, meaning, if you guys take a short rest, he needs to rest for an hour. It took you 40 minutes since that happened to get to the tower If you take a short rest, you’re going to have to deal with a Sylas TALIESIN: I mean fuck it, if we heal ourselves– SAM: Scanlan’s got healing. Scanlan Two’s got healing. We can pump you guys up TRAVIS: Because he also turns people, right? TALIESIN: He does turn people TRAVIS: I barely made that save LAURA: We need to not rest TALIESIN: How much heal do you get out of a potion? ASHLEY: Who’s bad? MARISHA: I’m not great ASHLEY: You’re bad? Who else? JOE: I could use some, seeing that I have tank duties SAM: How many can you include? ASHLEY: Okay, is anybody down? I’m going to do Prayer of Healing. I want to save Mass Cure Wounds MARISHA: I’m at 94 hit points, so I’m down– JOE: I’m down 42, but I could probably heal– MATT: You could take a short rest, but understand and be prepared with the knowledge of knowing that you’re also going– put some things in your chamber that will be helpful against a vampire SAM: Scanlan Two has tons of healing spells that he can use, so use them. He’s going to be dead soon anyway MARISHA: You guys don’t want us losing any of our spellcasters right now. I’m at 94. It’s not a lot, it’s not bad, but it’s bad enough. I’m a third of my hit points down MATT: You do have a battery of low-level spell slots right now that can be used to heal things up if you want to SAM: Yeah, I can heal you and heal you and heal you until you’re all done MARISHA: Yeah, but every time you heal me and heal me and heal me, it’s taking away from something else mechanically SAM: It’s a level one bullshit spell slot TALIESIN: But it’s also healing that could be done in combat. That’s what we’re meaning MARISHA: I’m resigning my decision right now MATT: Make a choice here, guys. You’re wasting time in the tower SAM: No short rest! Heal some people, I’ll heal some more. We got this. We got lots of healing ASHLEY: Okay, I’ll just use a 2nd-level for 16 points of healing for six people who need it SAM: Great! MARISHA: 16 points? I’ll take that LAURA: I’m taking one SAM: I will take it as well TALIESIN: How many people have taken it so far? SAM: You said up to six people? I’ll take that MARISHA: 110, I’m still 31 hit points down
SAM: I will cast Healing Word, or Scanlan Two will cast Healing Word at 2nd-level for you MARISHA: For me? SAM: Yeah. That’s– MATT: You can use Cure Wounds as opposed to Healing Word SAM: I don’t have Cure Wounds MATT: Oh, that’s right. Never mind SAM: That’s nine more points for you MARISH: For me? SAM: Yeah. Oh, wait! I can sing a Song of Rest MATT: That takes a short rest to do SAM: Yeah. That makes sense MARISHA: I could do my speech if I had a short rest LAURA: Well, you can do the speech as we climb up the tower! JOE: How much are you short? She’s 22 short? LAURA: The speech does what? Does the speech regain hit points? MATT: Ten minutes to say the speech LAURA: So as we climb the tower, she could be saying it? MATT: Perhaps, yeah SAM: I will heal you another 2nd-level healing spell LAURA: A Greater Healing Potion is 4d4? MATT: You’ve got it. 4d4 plus four SAM: That’s another 12 points MATT: Consider now, as you guys climb the tower, if you have any buff spells, if you have any long-lasting things that you want to utilize for the coming fray. Freedom of Movement, Death Ward, all the things you guys want to prepare with, now’s the time to do it MARISHA: 141, I’m full LIAM: I’m going to, when we’re right on the verge, when we think we’re right on the verge, I’m blessing you and you TRAVIS: I think this is the verge MARISHA: Is this the verge? Because if this is the verge– MATT: You still have the tower to climb, but know, if you have spells, like buffs, to cast that aren’t concentration and last a while, now’s the time to do it MARISHA: Like, an hour a while? JOE: Tiamat gave her 12. I’m going to give 18 to myself out of my healing pool MARISHA: Pike and I burn all of our 4th level spell splots to do– ASHLEY: Splots! MARISHA: Splots! Do all of our spell splots! To cast Freedom of Movement on anybody. With the exception of Percy, who already has it JOE: What does Freedom of Movement do? MATT: Wait, how many slots is that for you guys, then? MARISHA: Three each MATT: Three each. Okay MARISHA: Except, we didn’t account for– SAM: Scanlan Two MARISHA: Or Arkhan JOE: What’s happening? MATT: Okay. Anything else you want to buff with? LAURA: Yes, I’m going to invoke my Blessing of the Dawnfather MATT: Okay MARISHA: Oh my god MATT: No Death Wards? JOE: I did– MATT: You did Death Ward to yourself? TRAVIS: She has a Death Ward ASHLEY: Wait a second. One of us is without Freedom of Movement LAURA: Scanlan Two TALIESIN: I have it automatically MARISHA: He has it automatically ASHLEY: Understand LAURA: Can anybody cast some Death Wards too? JOE: Wait, I didn’t get Freedom of Movement? SAM, TALIESIN, and MARISHA: No SAM: We did it with an earring. Sorry, you weren’t on JOE: I’m over kicking a can in the corner SAM: We’re all on iPhones and you’re on a Windows phone ASHLEY: I don’t have another 4th-level, unless I burn a 5th-level, for Death Ward JOE: Now, I have some funky shit. I have a Cleansing Touch, anyway, that can end a spell on me or any willing creature that I touch, so that should help MATT: So what’s the plan, guys? SAM: Wait, we’re doing things that last an hour? LAURA: We’re doing things, yeah. We’re doing it SAM: Shit MARISHA: I mean, I don’t know– Unless we want to try and get higher up before we go MATT: That’s up to you guys MARISHA: Do we think this is it? Are we sure this is it? LIAM: Is it one of these guys where we can see the height of the tower, or–? MATT: You can’t see the height of the tower. It goes up into another floor MARISHA: Okay, so this means, anything we encounter, if it’s not fucking Vecna, then we’re barreling through it and going straight up Because we’ve burned everything MATT: If you want to hold your spells until you get higher, I’ll let you do that. Up to you LIAM: There’s a death knight MARISHA: I don’t know what’s worth it. Do we have any idea of how much higher this tower goes? MATT: I mean, it goes pretty high LIAM: Oh, excuse me. Where is Vecna right now? How high up? MATT: Right above you LIAM: Right above us, way up, or a floor up? MATT: Way up LIAM: Way up. Okay MARISHA: Do we want to try and jog another ten minutes before doing this? TALIESIN: Let’s get halfway up the tower MARISHA: Okay, okay. Before we burn everything– MATT: Just letting you guys be prepared here, because you’re Vox Machina MARISHA: Okay, we’re going to go ten more minutes up and I’m going to give a speech as we go LAURA: So I’m invoking the blessing as we get closer ASHLEY: Does anybody else want Death Ward? TALIESIN: No, I’m good MARISHA: I say, okay, guys, as we climb this tower, I know there’s a lot of stairs, but the stairs are going to be fucking nothing compared to Vecna. But holy fuck, these are a lot of fucking stairs SAM: This is inspiring TALIESIN: The stairs are a metaphor MARISHA: The stairs are a metaphor. Each stair that we get across is going to be like another
step further into defeating Vecna. You know? With each stair– I’m winded LAURA: The stairs are long, but they’re not infinite MARISHA: The stairs are long, but they are not infinite. Be good and now we’re almost there, guys! We’re almost there! This is it! This is it (sobbing and panting) LAURA: I feel so inspired, Keyleth. Thank you SAM: Wow, that was so inspiring MARISHA: This is it, you guys! Just keep going up the stairs! And that’s my speech MATT: Okay, take your 17– no, 19– MARISHA: 19 hit points MATT: 19 temporary hit points. Including you JOE: 19 temporary, yeah MARISHA: And they’re temporary, not– LAURA: In addition to our plus two, so now we have 21 MARISHA: Do we heal above that? MATT: Yeah. Well, you get temporary hit points, like a buffer shield MARISHA: Right, so those 19 go first MATT: Correct. Okay LAURA: Oh god, oh god, oh god. Okay, are we getting near the top? JOE: Let me know, because I’m going to throw up TRAVIS: Who wants the Death Ward? MARISHA: Yeah, and Pike and I cast whenever seems appropriate MATT: Right TRAVIS: But who wants it? Who needs it? SAM: I mean, who’s going to die? TALIESIN: This one, definitely LAURA: Okay, here’s the thing. The people that have the trammels should probably have a Death Ward, too TRAVIS: I’ve got my one hit point regenerate, regenerate, regenerate LAURA: Okay, you’re good SAM: Pike can have one ASHLEY: I have my armor LAURA: Okay, so that bumps you back up once you’ve gone down once. So really, he needs– and you, well, no. You won’t come back right away LIAM: If I have the Death Ward, I will pop back up MATT: There is only one person that can complete the Incantation of Sealing SAM: That’s me TRAVIS: Sealing of what? Oh, the trammels? MATT: Once the trammels are in– TRAVIS: You’ve got to put it on Scanlan TALIESIN: He has to do it. Without Scanlan, everything goes to shit LIAM: What about Scanlan Two? Can Scanlan Two do it? SAM: Technically. He’s not going to last that long, guys ASHLEY: I cast Death Ward on Scanlan SAM: Pike, I accept your blessing ASHLEY: Scanlan, if we get through this, you know what that means, don’t you? SAM: No, what does it mean? TALIESIN: It means that your clone’s going to get very lucky. You, on the other hand, no ASHLEY: You’ll just have to live. You wait and find out SAM: Well, what does it mean? What could it mean?! ASHLEY: Just live! You’ll see! SAM: Just then, the real Scanlan comes back from peeing. He’s like, what’d I miss, guys? (laughter) MATT: Ascending the stairs, you climb and climb, the spiral continuing upward. Both of the stairs spiral upward, so which direction did you take? The right, or the left? LAURA: The right. No, wait! Which hand does Vecna chop off? MATT: The left TRAVIS: What does your speech do, Keyleth, again? MARISHA: It gives you an additional 19 hit points Temporary hit points. So add plus 19 on top. When you lose them, they’re gone. Huh? SAM: We’re trying to decide whether we went left or right up the stairs TALIESIN: We went right MATT: Okay. You spiral upward and upward and upward, climbing an extremely long period of time Your legs begin to ache a little bit. Then another floor opens up. It appears the tower is now divided into two chambers. From the bottom floor up, it’s now two sides to a tower and you’re on the right side. The hallway curves around the outer edge of the tower. On the opposite side, you can see the staircase continues upward. The interior of this chamber appears to be an incredible arcane laboratory, occupying the center space of the tower inside. You see six overlapping circles of dulled runes and glyphs that encompass the entire 30-foot walkway between here and the stairs. Shelves and tables of countless glass tubes and metallic vices lay out across tables, organized in a near-OCD pattern. Tomes and books line the inner chamber walls. What do you guys do? LIAM: I use Divine Sense and feel for undead. 60 feet MATT: You sense around. No undead in the 60-foot radius LAURA: Does this feel like it might be Delilah’s room? Her chamber? MATT: You don’t know TALIESIN: From where I am, can I recognize any of the book titles? Any of it? MATT: From where you are now? You can’t even see It’s too far away LAURA: Is there any traps in this room? MATT: You can check for traps LIAM: Fan out
JOE: Can you sense Vecna? TALIESIN: Yes. If Vecna moves, we will know LAURA: What is that? Investigation? MATT: Investigation LIAM: 24 for me LAURA: 14 for me MATT: Okay. I mean, there’s symbols across the ground here, but they seem pretty inert. Three of the circles in the center of the chamber appear to be ready to trigger. By proximity. A five-foot proximity LIAM: Where’s the exit to this room? MATT: It’s across the way, around the outside of the tower wall, so you can follow along LIAM: We can go around the edge MATT: Most of you can. It’s a very tight walk to get through. You have a few large individuals LIAM: What’s making that so tight? Is there one trap that’s making it so tight, or all of them? MATT: There are three large circles that overlap with each other that are triggerable, and then there are three inert ones that overlap. It’s like a series of Venn diagrams LIAM: Did they seem arcane in nature? MATT: Yes, they do LIAM: Do I have a shot in hell? Of disarming them? TRAVIS: I take out the Immovable Rod and have it in my hand MATT: Okay. Make an intelligence check LIAM: Natural 20 MATT: These traps are far beyond your understanding to disable LIAM: Okay, okay MATT: You glance at these and go, “Oh, this is bad.” TRAVIS: We would need Dispels LAURA: What if we go– no, the people that are small go around. I’ll bamf Trinket out on one side, put Grog in, go back, put Arkhan in, go back? We work our way around the runes SAM: What about the zombies? LAURA: The zombies are little. They can work their way around SAM: No no, his slave zombies TALIESIN: They’re little TRAVIS: His dead brother, and– JOE: Aw man, I wasn’t thinking about it until you brought it up again! Like, I was actually in an okay place! TRAVIS: I’m sorry, I thought, you know– Got to pay respect LAURA: Are you guys okay with this plan? LIAM: (Marlon Brando voice) I could’ve been somebody, Arkhan. Instead of a zombie. Because I am JOE: (Marlon Brando voice) Vander, pick up the mic, boy, and hit me in the head with it MATT: I need everybody except for Arkhan and Grog to go ahead and make a general dexterity check LAURA: Oh, fuck. I thought we would be able to avoid it. Natural 20! TALIESIN: 24 MATT: Okay SAM: Scanlan Two is okay. He made a 17. Scanlan One had a one MATT: Okay. So. What’d you get? MARISHA: Oh, I had to roll? MATT: Everybody except for Arkhan and– MARISHA: Oh, everyone but for them! Dex save LIAM: Oh, who’s near me? Could I retcon and say that I’m– MATT: Dexterity check. You add your dexterity modifier LIAM: What did you get? You got a natural one? MATT: Scanlan did, yeah LIAM: If I’m next to him, because I give plus two to saves, does that futz with it? MATT: It’s not an ability check, it’s a saving throw. One is an auto-fail for a saving throw JOE: They weren’t within ten feet of me, were they? MATT: No, next would have been partially across Because you couldn’t get across, you’re too wide JOE: Fair enough MARISHA: 13 MATT: Okay, that’s fine. And you got? A four? Okay. So. As you guys are moving across, Scanlan and Pike, you both are clustered next to each other. Unfortunately, Pike begins to wobble. You reach to grab her and pull her in, but the armored weight is too strong and you both accidentally step out of place. At which point, the glyph to your left suddenly flares. You watch as, in a flash of sudden arcane energy, a cage of force-like power encompasses the both of you in a cube. You see these bars of crackling energy (lighting crackle) around. You’re both currently stuck within this arcane entrapment. The gnomes LAURA: Can Scanlan Two dispel that shit? SAM: I don’t know Dispel Magic MARISHA: Can you Dimension Door? SAM: Good question. If only the person in here with me was also of gnome size. Oh wait! She is We’ll Dimension Door out LIAM: Do we want to try to get everyone else across before you do that? Maybe it’s a one-time-only? LAURA: Everybody else went already MATT: Well, they’re currently blocking the path, now, with this cage LIAM: Oh, okay. Well, I meant the necklace, but SAM: I don’t know how this spell works. I hope it works. We might get hit on the way out MATT: Okay. As you clasp Pike and complete the incantation, I need you to make a charisma saving throw TRAVIS: Come on, buddy! Come on! Come on! SAM: A charisma save? Is this magic? MATT: It is SAM: Okay. 20 MATT: 20? 20 will do it SAM: I’ve never had to make a charisma saving throw before TALIESIN: You got very high MATT: So. As you grab her and you both begin to transport outside of the cage, you feel the force
of it push back, but the nature of your innate magical ability manages to puncture through that threshold and then both of you reappear at the opposite side, no worse for wear. The cage is still present, though, and it’s now blocking the path across The rest of you get across fine. It’s the gnomes that got stuck, and now the two of you are on the opposite end. You have 30 feet between you and the opposite side, and that walkway is entirely closed off JOE: We can do this TRAVIS: Yeah. I’m not worried one bit SAM: Wait, did you switch your boots? TRAVIS: I did! LAURA: You can Spider Climb to the ceiling! TRAVIS: Do you want to Cirque du Soleil this thing? We’ll hold arms and I’ll walk on the ceiling? SAM: Two shirtless, hunky dudes holding each other?! In crazy poses? LIAM: Definitely take your armor off for this, though. Definitely MARISHA: Not for any particular reason TALIESIN: We still have the pot. You could get some oil and really make this work JOE: My answer to your question was– Cut to TRAVIS: Yeah, I will walk up on the wall so that I’m sticking out TALIESIN: That’s a lot of powerful– JOE: Oh, I have four fingers MATT: Okay. The force cage encompasses too much of the wall space to go sideways, so you’ll have to go across the ceiling TRAVIS: Because I was inverted, bullshit. Top Gun? Thank you MATT: As you climb the top and you pull, Arkhan, you tuck your feet up underneath TRAVIS: Treat me like your fucking dragons– French girl, whatever LIAM: Paint me like one of your chromatic girls JOE: You like volleyball, bro? Just thinking, if we make it out of here, we should play some beach volleyball some time TRAVIS: Hand wraps, get some aviators? It’d be totally cool MATT: Could you both please make athletics checks for me? TRAVIS: I’m still raging MATT: Yeah, you’ve been raging this whole time You’re the most intense spotter right now JOE: This is an athletics check? MATT: Yes JOE: 22 TRAVIS: 25 MATT: Step by step, you carry the heavy, armored, red-scaled dragonborn across the threshold of the chamber. You release him and both safely come to the opposite side of the laboratory LAURA: Good job, guys LIAM: Is it hot in here? TRAVIS: Not a problem. What happened to you guys? JOE: Did you guys see that? SAM: Yes. We did MATT: You continue up the stairs? ALL: Yes LIAM: Point of order. I know roughly how far Vecna is, right? So I should be able to tell, as we’re getting closer, roughly how much distance? Halfway up the tower, three quarters, et cetera? MATT: You guys are, based on far you’ve climbed, you’re about halfway up the tower TALIESIN: I would like to do one thing before we leave the room. I would like to take something, set it on fire, and toss it on those books over there LIAM: Oh, that’s dark LAURA: Nice MARISHA: We’re holding on our Freedom of Movement, right? We decided that? Until we get higher? LIAM: How long did it take us to get to this point? MATT: I’d say a little over ten minutes or so of continuous climbing LIAM: Who knows what is above us. It could be slower for the upper half SAM: Fire stays where it is, typically. It doesn’t move up LAURA: We’re fine. I like it TALIESIN: There’s nothing else to catch fire in here. It’ll be nice TRAVIS: Is there anything else to catch fire that would travel upward toward us as we’re climbing a towering inferno? MATT: It’s a stone chamber SAM: Full of chemicals TALIESIN: It’ll be noxious, but brief. I take a torch. I actually have one last Whitestone seal that’s flash-powdered. Wrap it, light it, and toss it on the counter MATT: Okay. It clatters and the torch burns. The powder (flaring) TALIESIN: That’ll do. Walk away MATT: You guys continue up the next set of spiral stairs, climbing higher and higher up Entropis You can see, every now and then, one of the various vein-like cracks of energy that’s holding the tower together. You can glance out and see, very obscured, movement in the distance. It’s too
fractured; too much diffraction Continuing upward, you come to a second, or another, floor. About four minutes of climbing This next half-chamber, you see dozens of sets of chains and manacles affixed to the walls, where tortured corpses are currently dangling from them, left in pieces. The scent is terrible. Decay is strong LIAM: I cast Divine Sense. Undead MATT: No undead LIAM: Traps? MATT: Go ahead and make an investigation check LIAM: 18 MATT: Okay. No traps in this chamber TALIESIN: Do we recognize any of the corpses? MATT: Make a perception check TALIESIN: I had to do it. Natural 20 MARISHA: Oh no! TALIESIN: I get to know. The rest of you don’t get to know MATT: Most of the corpses around here have been mutilated to the point where it’s hard to even recognize. This was essentially a torture chamber This was a gathering information, this was a point-making chamber. The ones you do see around here, nothing catches your eye. One does seem familiar. You look and see, and it’s been a while, but you remember the face of a Scalebearer Desona, who traveled across the Ozmit Sea with you aboard a skyship. Glancing around, the bodies appear to have been cleaned of any useful items. This is mainly a for-utility-and-fun chamber TRAVIS: Any weapons or items besides the chains and manacles on the floor? MATT: The room is clean LIAM: How far above us is Vecna? MATT: About 120 feet LAURA: We should cast it now. We should do all of our casting MARISHA: Okay LAURA: Now I invoke the Blessing of the Dawnfather TRAVIS: Call it out MARISHA: I’m waiting for Pike ASHLEY: Let’s do it MATT: Okay. Doing a round of what spells to who? MARISHA: Freedom of Movement to Scanlan One, myself, Vax MATT: So only three Freedoms of Movement? SAM: That’s all she has, right? MARISHA: That’s all I’ve got. From Keyleth MATT: From Keyleth, right. And then, Pike? ASHLEY: Freedom of Movement on Vex, Grog, and Pike LIAM: I’m putting the wings out now MATT: The raven wings emerge. Pike? You said you were doing Death Ward? LAURA: Oh yeah, she did it on Scanlan ASHLEY: Death Ward at a 5th-level MATT: Okay, so 5th slot’s taken SAM: Scanlan will invoke the Blessing of the Knowing Mistress MATT: You watch as the forehead space, where once you had seen the briefly visible third eye of Ioun, now emblazoned like a lantern light, this bright purple eye. In that moment, you watch as Scanlan’s pupils turn to silver LAURA: Whoa! Are you still you? SAM: I can’t see anything! Everything’s silver! Oh god, I’m blind! I’m just kidding. I can see fine TALIESIN: I charge Diplomacy up ASHLEY: And I will invoke the Blessing of the Everlight MATT: And with that, you watch as this bright light emerges from the back of Pike’s shoulders as a familiar, but much more vibrant and strong set of divine golden wings, not made of energy, but visibly beautiful gold feathered wings expand from her back. Your feet lift off the ground and (whooshing). As the voice of Sarenrae whispers into her ear, “I’m with you.” ASHLEY: (squealing) Okay! Thank you! LAURA: I bamf Trinket out MATT: (bear noises) LAURA: If you want to Polymorph him? SAM: Now’s the time? Polymorph only lasts– is it an hour or ten minutes? I’ve got to learn this MATT: Polymorph, I think, is an hour with concentration. Could be wrong, but I think it is Do note, you still have another series of staircases that are pretty tight LAURA: Okay, we should go up. We should keep going LIAM: Also, I’m going to say this now, in advance It might not be possible, but if we get to a door, I’m thinking ahead of time, if we think we’re about to step out, I want to cast Bless on the three half-elves right before going out. That might not be possible, but it’s in my head to do it MATT: Okay, good to keep in mind JOE: We should send Delilah in first SAM: Yeah, sure MARISHA: That’s actually a good idea SAM: Scanlan Two is going to dump a 3rd-level spell into the Tome of Isolation to reveal the hidden text. Is it only revealed to Scanlan Two, or is it revealed to everyone?
MATT: Let me see the item again. Well, the text remains for an hour, yep LIAM: You’re blessed. If it happens, hashtag blessed, a d4 rolled for every attack or saving throw MATT: Once the text is revealed, technically, anybody with any sort of penchant for arcane knowledge could attempt it, but you have the best chance LAURA: So you don’t need to do that SAM: No, I do need to, to reveal the text. It’s hidden otherwise MATT: Correct, but the text is revealed for an hour. If, in theory, you were to fall, and the book could be found– TRAVIS: I got it. I’ll pick it up and start reading MATT: Yep. It’s more difficult, but it’s possible SAM: I have a book I need to read MARISHA: It’s possible, but (uncertain noise)? Is what his face was? MATT: Because he was the chosen of Ioun, he can read without issue, but the text itself is still very arcane in nature LAURA: He’s the only one that can finish the sealing MARISHA: Right. Then Keyleth turns to Vax: Whatever happens, lest it be trite, stay with us Casts Guidance for the next minute, which gives you 1d4 on ability checks LAURA: Right before we go out, you mean? MARISHA: Yeah, before we move. Just for the start of it MATT: You guys begin to climb up the next staircase? All right. You’re beginning to spiral up the next length of it. You get about 80 or so feet up before– are you leading this charge visibly? TRAVIS: Actually, Delilah is MATT: You’re sending Delilah ahead of you? LAURA: When we get up to the top MATT: As you’re coursing around the edge, the stairs stop into another chamber. The chamber levels off LIAM: Up so that we’re seeing the edge of steps at the top? All right, I’m stealthing MATT: Okay, make a stealth check JOE: Very quickly, Grog, give me another longsword for zombie Vander TRAVIS: Last one I have. You got it LIAM: Are we Pass Without a Trace right now? 44 MATT: 44? So you stealth up around the edge and you see now, where once it was divided into two chambers, it now seems the chambers converged once more into a single room. It’s not very big, and the tower’s been slowly tapering the higher up you go. The room is fairly empty. You see a few vases in the corners and some basic ancient decor Standing, not noticing you’re there, you see three figures in full dark armor. Similar to who you fought in the ziggurat, or the one who was guarding the tunnel that led up into Thar Amphala LIAM: They don’t look like the big kahuna, they look like the underlings? MATT: The underlings. You see them in the same dark, horned armor. There’s one that’s humanoid sized and one that looks to be halfling size. Or two of them, halfling size LIAM: From my hidden position, I want to see if I see any traps in the room MATT: Make an investigation check for the immediate entry LIAM: I’m not entering. I want to do it from my peeky spot MATT: For the immediate entry for what you can see. You can’t investigate from across the room TRAVIS: They’re facing away from us? MATT: They’re not facing away, but they don’t seem to acknowledge his presence yet. They don’t see him LIAM: Yeah. 23 for investigation MATT: You don’t see any traps in the immediate vicinity of the room LIAM: So what I’m going to do is slowly back down to the party, relate what I just saw. Three of them. What do we do? SAM: Standard undead? LAURA: No, they’re death knights MATT: They’re not death knights LIAM: They’re dudes in armor. They’re lackeys TALIESIN: Are they humans or undead? MATT: Can’t tell. Fully armored JOE: How far up the stairs? MATT: From where you guys are right now, they’re about 30 feet around the way and then ten feet into the chamber JOE: I’ll Divine Sense, which is up to 60 feet Are they fiends, celestial, or undead? MATT: Nope JOE: It looks like they’re human LIAM: Is it difficult to use that silenced weapon of yours? TALIESIN: Once I use it, I’ve got ten minutes of silence. I was curious that if I get close enough to Vecna, he can’t talk. I was hoping to save that, because that might be a thing where we can
keep him from casting vocal spells MARISHA: Can we stealth around them and not fight them at all? LIAM: It’s a small room. You and I can probably handle two, but that leaves a third MATT: You see one staircase, one final staircase, that winds around the corner. Actually, you haven’t seen it yet TRAVIS: There’s no chance you could remove the stone from the middle of the floor and have them fall? MARISHA: That’s what I was looking for. Can Keyleth take a peek and see what’s up? MATT: Make a stealth check MARISHA: Yeah TALIESIN: Plus ten MARISHA: Do you still have that? LIAM: Yeah MARISHA: Dope. That’s real good. 39 MATT: 39? As you curl around the edge and glance inside, you recognize this chamber. When you scried in here previously, this was the chamber that was being left by the death knight as he ascended to the top of the tower. This is the last stop MARISHA: (inarticulate yelling) Okay LAURA: Can you open up the floor underneath them? MARISHA: Does it look like the floor opens? MATT: It doesn’t look like it’s a trap door or anything LAURA: It’s stone. Could you open the floor and let them fall? LIAM: Could Stubby and I each target one and you yank one into the ground simultaneously? Can you do that right now? SAM: I could hold one TALIESIN: Let’s have you two take some out and send the big guys in MARISHA: It’s worked stone MATT: It’s all worked stone. It’s all very carved SAM: I could hold one. Paralyze one of them TRAVIS: If we don’t think the room or the setup will fuck us up, the big boys can go in and probably handle it. Or we can follow your attacks LIAM: We don’t want to create a stir. We might, so it’s better that we do two quietly and leave one left. Can you throw your fucking Manners ball at the third? TALIESIN: It’s better against weaker opponents LAURA: It’s a thin staircase. Three people won’t be able to attack at once TALIESIN: I’ll have ten minutes of silence MATT: Two at most would be able to strike at once LAURA: So you and me go up, sneak attack, fall back and let somebody run in and take it out. Yeah? LIAM: Yeah, so who’s going in? MATT: You have the taller one in the center and the two smaller ones flanking LAURA: We’ll take the smaller ones TRAVIS: I would send in the dragonborn, because they’re all alive JOE: Yeah LAURA: Get ready to fight once we take the two out LIAM: Tell me again, the three that are in this room? MATT: There’s a human-sized one in the center and two halfling-sized ones on either side TRAVIS: Jocks Machina does not get hazed JOE: Stop bullying Jocks Machina! LIAM: Arkhan, we’re going to handle the small Right after, you’ll handle the tall JOE: Sounds good to me LAURA: We sneak up. Is it auto-crit if it’s a sneak attack? MATT: If they’re surprised LAURA: Okay, are they surprised? LIAM: I stealthed. You have to stealth, right? MATT: You have to stealth LAURA: Okay, 29 LIAM: I will go a split second before my sister MATT: Both of you guys curl up to the edge and you see the three of them. What are you doing? LAURA: We’re attacking the two smallest LIAM: Throwing on the right, throwing on the left MATT: You’re attacking the one on the right, and you’re the one on the left. Go ahead and roll your attacks LAURA: Is it auto-crit? MATT: If it hits, it’s an auto-crit, but you have advantage on the attack because they don’t know you’re there LAURA: Oh, that’s good. 30 on the first hit MATT: That hits LIAM: They all hit. That’s good. Four LAURA: Oh my god, I rolled four sixes! And a five LIAM: I’m doing okay, too LAURA: 29 times two is what? SAM: Both of you guys got big damage JOE: What is it? 29 times two? MATT: That’s 58 LAURA: 58 plus eight, so 64. 66! LIAM: 80 for the first LAURA: That’s the first attack MATT: All right, so a second attack for each of you LAURA: 19 MATT: That hits LIAM: 12 for my second MATT: Does not hit LIAM: No, they all hit. All my attacks hit. 12 damage for the second MATT: Okay, what’s the damage on the second one? LAURA: 18 on the second MATT: Both of the armored ones on the side take the hit and crumple, fall back, helmet falling off. Unconscious LAURA: I immediately move to the side so he can run through JOE: So the guy turns around? And I’m– (whoosh)
MATT: They’re still in the center of the chamber They’re about 15 feet from the top of the stairs The two of you are going to rush in? Arkhan, you rush in towards the one in the center, go for it SAM: Unleash everything JOE: I don’t think I can reach. I don’t think I’m in range. Did you see that? MATT: So what’d you roll? SAM: Right as he runs, Scanlan says: Don’t fuck this up! MATT: As they both drop, you rush up to the one in the metal armor, who doesn’t react to your arrival, stands there staring at you as you rush forward and swing. You hit the armor, but you hit the edge of the blade, cleaves off doing no impact LAURA: Does he move? JOE: That’s attack one. Okay, that’s a 21 MATT: 21 hits TALIESIN: That looked bad from this angle. Yeah, I see it now! Holy cow JOE: He’s not undead. He’s not undead, is he? MATT: He’s not undead, nope JOE: Okay. Well, this is going to be weird, then Oh, that’s not bad. That’s 28 MATT: 28, all right. You hack and the axe slides into the front of the breast plate and as you pull back, you see a gout of blood. He takes it not reacting JOE: Just stands there? TALIESIN: Maybe we shouldn’t kill all of– JOE: I would like to bonus action MATT: Okay JOE: No, I wouldn’t. I’m not– LAURA: Why isn’t he moving? Does he have a helmet on? MATT: Yeah. The one standing has a helmet and the two that fell, their helmets tumbled off as they impacted and fell back ASHLEY: What do they look like up there when their helmets came off? LAURA: Oh no! Were they our friends? JOE: What friends? LAURA: Pull the helmet off. Arkhan, pull the helmet off! JOE: I pull the helmet off MATT: You pull the helmet off and you watch immediately a bit of black, fuzzy facial hair from underneath. As you reveal, you see darkened skin and long black hair with a bit of colored makeup under the eyes and a metal band across the forehead, looking ahead, unmoving, unflinching, locked in place staring past you LAURA: Is it Gilmore? MATT: You glance up, and it’s Gilmore standing in the middle of the room LAURA: We killed the two– TRAVIS: No, we don’t know anything yet JOE: I command zombie Delilah and zombie Vander to go to the heads and take the helmets off the two heads on the ground MATT: The helmets are partially off, so it’s easy enough to slip the helms off. To the left, it was less of a halfling and more of a younger girl Jammed into the armor and a little taller than the other, you can see brown hair with a shock of white in it currently laying back, unmoving and bleeding out. The other one looks to be specifically gnomish, short brown hair and eyes wide on the ground SAM: (high-pitched) Is that my girl? Is that my baby girl? ASHLEY: I think it’s an illusion. I’m hoping. I don’t know. I feel this can’t be real SAM: It’s my baby girl– ASHLEY: I’m going in. Can I stand over one of the bodies and do a perception check? A medicine check? MATT: Make a medicine check TRAVIS: No, there’s no way ASHLEY: 23 MATT: 23? They’re not illusions, and they are both dead JOE: I cut the head off of the one in the middle LAURA: No, don’t do it! Arkhan, don’t! ASHLEY: No! I stand in front of him and say: no! Please don’t! MATT: They still have the bands. Each one of them has this strange brass band across the head ASHLEY: I take my mace, and I slowly try to take one of the bands off MATT: You take it off the head of one of the two dead? ASHLEY: Yeah, but not touching it, scraping it off MATT: It slides off ASHLEY: Does anything happen? LAURA: Can we cast Revivify on them? TRAVIS: Don’t do that SAM: Yeah, do that LAURA: Who is it? Who are they for sure? MATT: It is Kaylie and Cassandra LAURA: It’s Kaylie and Cassandra? SAM: Revivify them. Take the bands off and Revivify them TALIESIN: What is the band, before we do anything?
SAM: Take it off of Gilmore. He’s still alive TALIESIN: This may kill him MATT: No, she took it off one of the front ASHLEY: Does Gilmore look like he’s still alive? MATT: He’s wounded, but he’s still alive and staring forward ASHLEY: I’ll do the same thing MATT: You pull the band off, and the eyes flicker for a second. (panting) “What happened? Where am “I? How–” JOE: I pull the axe back MATT: “What happened?” MARISHA: He doesn’t know SAM: Save her. Right now JOE: I put my hand up over his mouth TALIESIN: Take them ASHLEY: It’s okay MATT: He looks down ASHLEY: I stand over Kaylie and I cast Revivify MATT: You see the eyes lull back, the stillness of the body as you finish touching the body a warm burst. (gasps) Breath comes back to her and she starts coughing. Sits up and leans over, gasping SAM: I go, grab her, and hold her ASHLEY: I stand over Cassandra and I cast Revivify SAM: These are big spells, aren’t they? MATT: As you reach out and touch her chest, the brief moment of stillness leads as her eyes slowly blink back, and begins breathing again TRAVIS: This is some Seven shit right here LAURA: That is so fucked up! SAM: Shaun. Can you get them out of here? MATT: “Yes, I–” LAURA: How did you get here? Is it really you? LIAM: Do you remember anything, Shaun? MARISHA: Anything that can help us? MATT: “I was in my workshop, and there was a flash of light. A doorway opened, and it pulled me “through and–” LAURA: Can I roll an insight check and see if it’s him? MATT: Roll an insight check LIAM: I’m taking him by the cheeks. You’re in a very bad place. You’re in a very bad place and time. You need to get out of here. You need to take these women and go downstairs and hide LAURA: 21 MATT: 21? It’s Shaun Gilmore LIAM: You are in no shape to do anything right now. You need to take these two women and hide downstairs. Do you hear me? MATT: “Where are we? What’s going on?” LIAM: There’s no time to explain MARISHA: We’re in the tower of Entropis. We’re on the back of a titan. Try to get them as far away from here as possible. Vasselheim is an hour away LAURA: Or you can fight with us LIAM: No. His head is not where it needs to be MATT: “Wait. So if we’re in– We’re near Vasselheim? What’s Entropis?” MARISHA: No, we’re in Thar Amphala. It’s been teleported to the back of a titan, which is a giant mountain, which is what we’re on. It’s from the Shadowfell. You just have to get away! LAURA: We’re 15 feet below Vecna. He’s right above us MATT: “Then what are you going to do?” LAURA: We’re going to fight him MARISHA: And you’re going to go away LIAM: In 30 minutes, we could all be dead. But if we have any chance– You three need to not be here. You need to go down now MATT: “I can get the three of us away. I can teleport us. It’s the maximum of what I can do.” MARISHA: J’mon Sa Ord is here, the Slayer’s Take has probably been vastly compromised. Just get out of here. Get to the woods. Scanlan’s right MATT: “I can probably take us back to Emon. Why even stay here?” MARISHA: Then go! Go! MATT: “I’ll do that. You’re going to fight this Vecna?” TALIESIN: I hate to even ask, but is there anything you can do and still–? MATT: “If we make it quick.” TRAVIS: I’d almost rather him stay and fight SAM: No! He’s got to get them away. They’re at one hit point each! MATT: “If you can make this quick, I can leave you with some intense adrenaline, my friend.” TRAVIS: Me? MATT: “Yes.” TRAVIS: I’m a fan of adrenaline MATT: He looks around to the blood on the floor and the two barely living women at his side and says, “If the one you’re going to fight is the one that did this to me and them… Leave a scar in my
“name, if you don’t mind. When it’s done, maybe carve a unicorn.” TRAVIS: With pleasure MATT: You begin to hear heavy footsteps coming up the stairs behind you, heavy footfalls, and a number of other footsteps heading up the tower behind you. He goes and grabs the bodies close Glancing around you, up the stairway you see emerging the death knight who joined you in the fight against Vecna SAM: I grab Kaylie by the face and I say to her: Goodbye MATT: The one that met you at the top of the tower last time you fought Vecna emerges, looks across, and begins to go for the blade JOE: I go straight for him MATT: You go straight for him? JOE: With the death knight? Straight for him MATT: Gilmore reaches out to you and casts Haste on you TRAVIS: Haste?! (gasps) MATT: “But it lasts a minute. Hurry!” MARISHA: I hate to say this but Arkhan do you have him? JOE: Get upstairs! I’ll hold him off! MARISHA: Let’s go! LIAM: Bless. Shaun! It was an honor knowing you MATT: “It will be an honor knowing you all still.” Grabbing on to both of the girls and with a flash of light, the three of them vanish. The death knight has turned to reach out and goes to cast something. Arkhan rushes up and slams the axe across his arm, knocking it aside. You can see now, behind them, other cultists and other things begin to head up the stairs. But they’re currently being choked at this point where the death knight’s being held at the stairway where Arkhan is stepping there JOE: Zombies are grabbing for his arms MATT: As Arkhan holds off, you guys head up towards the top of the tower. That’s where we’re going to pick up next week (screaming) TRAVIS: What did you do?! You Kevin Spacey from Seven mother fucker! What did you do? MATT: When you revealed to a god how close and dangerous you were last game, there were going to be repercussions TRAVIS: (terrified laughter) Oh my god! MATT: And he knows how to get to you. He knows your secrets LIAM: This is a great game! JOE: This is the most fun I’ve ever had! (laughter) MATT: I love you guys. We’ll pick this up next week for what will most likely be the final battle SAM: Ashley, can you pipe in? ASHLEY: I don’t know yet. I don’t know the schedule MATT: If any of you are watching are from Blindspot, find a way to not have her work Thursday evening, please. That went a little longer than we anticipated, but we’re at the end of the campaign LIAM: Joe Manganiello! (cheering) JOE: Jocks. We’re here. Get used to it (laughter) JOE: Thank you so much for having me MATT: Of course! Thanks for coming TALIESIN: I’ve been looking forward to this TRAVIS: You’re welcome! Any time JOE: Tiamat: she ain’t so bad MATT: Well, she’s pretty fucking bad. But when your goals are aligned, it can be useful. Well guys, thank you for joining us for this extended episode leading into the final fray of the campaign. I’m so excited for next week TALIESIN: Everything’s downhill from here. It’ll be super easy TRAVIS: You’ve got surprises and then you’ve got that shit. LIAM: That was fucked up TALIESIN: I was feeling weird about it JOE: I was going to cut his head off. I thought he was some kind of sentinel. He was seeing through his eyes or whatever. I was about to chop his head off TRAVIS: Thank god you rolled a one JOE: That was the luckiest one MATT: That was a lucky fucking one, dude! LIAM: Next campaign, we don’t attack anybody! We talk to everybody! Every NPC, every hot dog vender, every lich! Talk! MATT: That was a fucked-up tactic is what it was LIAM: Fucked up! You managed in the space of a week to make the choke-out seem like child’s play!
TALIESIN: You are a monster MATT: Vecna is a monster, guys TALIESIN: I’m so proud JOE: My undead brother I’m dragging around with me! This is fucking so fucked up! (laughter) MATT: Well, thank you guys, hope you had a good time. We’ll see you guys next week. Have a wonderful night, and is it Thursday yet? Bye! MARISHA: Congrats to our t-shirt winners! [music]